Dreams of the Psychic

Still Standing, Ch03

2009-09-23T23:06:35Z

OMG... I didn't even realize that I didn't post this chapter. It's been done for ages... ;; Sorries

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Vincent, Cid, Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Vincent/Cid, Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Still Standing
Word Count: 2,730
Chapter: Chapter 02/?
Status: Incomplete
Rating: R (for language so far)
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this series, I wouldn't need a job.
Summery: As Cloud goes back to ShinRa, Vincent is left behind...with a piece of paper. Will his curiosity get the better of him to find out who Cid Highwind is? And will the five of them ultimately learn that getting rid of Jenova just isn't that easy?

It was hardly the most ideal trip for Vincent. Cid rarely stopped talking and his bemoaning for his plane was forefront for most of it. After awhile, the pilot started asking him more than yes or no questions, something that was not high on Vincent’s list of favorite things. He didn’t mind talking, so much, so long as who he was talking to was someone he trusted and liked. Cid was not one of those people. If it weren’t for Cloud and some nagging feeling that told him to do what Cloud asked, he would have left the pilot in the middle of nowhere quite happily.

“It’s getting dark,” he commented as they finally reached the edge of the large plateau, a beach no more than a ten minute walk to their left. Vincent would have pressed on until it became pitch black, but he was feeling exceptionally tired after all that had gone on today, the plane crash only being one in a long line of events that had sapped him of energy.

“Your point bein’?”

“We should stop and get some rest. There is no point in exhausting ourselves when we won’t reach Costa Del Sol for several more days.”

“Then I hope ya got a tent in that coat, ‘cause I ain’t got nothin’.”

He gave Cid a look that clearly said he was being obstinate for no good purpose. “You will come to no harm sleeping on the ground under the sky.”

“Yeah, well…you do that.”

He blinked once at the comment. “…What are you planning on doing exactly?”

Cid glanced over his shoulder and shifted. “Gotta go back to the Tiny Bronco.”

“For what purpose?” he asked curiously.

“Gotta go pick somethin’ up.”

The fact that the pilot wasn’t answering his questions piqued his curiosity even more, as so far from what he could tell, he’d been perfectly honest with whatever question Vincent chose to ask. “Pick what up?”

Blue eyes glared at him and Cid spat, “Ain’t nothin’ to do with you, so shut the fuck up! I’ll be back, I ain’t gonna leave, so just stay here.”

Vincent watched as Cid stalked back the way they came. What could he possibly want from the wreck? There could hardly be much left. Pursing his lips, he silently followed the pilot. He had once been a Turk trained for subtlety and on top of that, thanks to Hojo’s machinations, was as silent as the grave as he did so. Cid never knew he was being followed.

It had taken an hour and a half to get from the top of plateau where they’d landed and it would be dark in another hour. Cid wouldn’t be getting much sleep by the time he got back to where Vincent had decided they were to camp for the night. Neither would Vincent at this rate, but his curiosity was a difficult thing to manage against, even after all this time.

The pilot kept glancing around, but it didn’t appear as if he were making sure he wasn’t followed. It wasn’t an unreasonable action; there were dangerous creatures that came out at night, which wouldn’t be long now. Still, apparently the plateau wasn’t a frequent spot for anything, because there was no hint of anything approaching. Not even a chocobo. Perhaps the sounds of the crash earlier had sufficiently scared away everything enough for the night.

Cid treated the wreckage with care, using gloves that had apparently been in his pocket to protect his hands as he moved piece after piece to the side in his search. At least it was only giving off minimal smoke by now. Given the crash, Vincent had difficulty determining what the pieces were at this point, but they meant something to Cid. He kept himself a good distance away from the pilot so he wasn’t seen. He wasn’t sure why, he honestly didn’t care if he made Cid angry, but perhaps it was a remnant of humanity that Hojo hadn’t managed to sap out of him that acceded to the ‘request’…such as it was.

Cid’s torso all but disappeared in what Vincent assumed was the remains of the cockpit in his search. A moment later there was a sound of success from the pilot and he began tugging on something. Curses followed soon after when whatever it was didn’t heed to his command to come loose. Watching Cid was actually amusing and he could see why perhaps the other man wanted him to stay behind. Some of his positions Cid contorted himself in to get at whatever it was, was hardly dignified or manly in any way. Vincent had to bite his lip gently so he wouldn’t actually snicker aloud and alert the other man to his presence.

The pilot paused for a minute to catch his breath and apparently think up a new strategy while muttering and randomly kicking the cockpit idly. He couldn’t help wondering what it was that was so difficult to get out. It must be awkwardly shaped, or the crash caused the cockpit to be deformed. Cid stalked around the wreckage of the plane several times before bending himself in it again and shoving against something several times. Apparently he had some success in that, since he started to pull up at an angle after a few minutes.

Vincent watched in surprise as something long and thin started to appear and it took a second to realize it was a spear of some kind. Cid, all but straddling the outside of the cockpit, yanked hard when it stopped moving and he assumed that the spear had gotten caught on something again. Another hard yank was apparently enough because it suddenly came loose and Cid, with a shout, fell end over end off the wreckage in surprise of the sudden lack of tension.

Seeing all there was to see, Vincent slunk away as Cid picked himself up and headed back to where they’d stopped.

-0-0-0-

Using as much speed as he could get, Vincent had reached the area that he’d decided on for camp long before Cid and he pretended to be asleep. Cid glanced at him cautiously before he settled down on the ground to get what little sleep he could. It didn’t bother Vincent really, that he only had one or two hours sleep; while he still needed it, he needed much less than a normal person thanks to Hojo.

So he was awake long before the pilot and shook him when the sun started to rise over the horizon. Like he had expected, there was grumbling but oddly enough, no fight over it. Though Cid made it clear verbally that he hated mornings and didn’t want to get up, there was no hesitation as he did so despite his words to the contrary.

Vincent didn’t ask about the spear even though by the look on Cid’s face as he’d picked it up, the pilot had expected him to. Even if he hadn’t followed and seen Cid, he still wouldn’t have asked merely because he wasn’t that interested. At least the morning was quiet, he reflected. In fact, Cid seemed to be asleep with his eyes open as they walked and more than once, Vincent had to pull him to the side so he’d avoid walking into something. A tree, for instance.

“Why do you keep doin’ that?” Cid complained after the tenth time.

“Because if I didn’t and you ran into the tree, you would start to curse and sputter and I would have to listen to that for hours. I’d rather not.”

“Well it shouldn’t have been in my way!”

Vincent almost laughed. “I believe the tree was there first,” he deadpanned.

Cid stared at him for such a long time that he finally asked, “What is it?”

“Nothin’. Just didn’t know you could joke, is all.”

“I wasn’t joking.”

“Okay, well, maybe it wasn’t a joke per se, but that kind of thing is supposed to be funny when you say it, so…still a joke.”

Vincent shook his head. “I don’t understand you at all.”

“Welcome to the club. Why are you the way you are?”

“What do you mean?”

“Exactly what I asked. Why are you so annoyingly stoic and generally no fun and—”

Enough of that, thank you, he thought as he interrupted, “Why are you the way you are, cursing as if every day deserved such abuse? You just are, and I just am.” He wasn’t up to explaining in any way, shape, or form the reasons of his personality, even if he could in a way that Cid could understand. He wasn’t about to bare his soul to someone he didn’t trust.

Cid shoved his hands in his pockets and muttered curses under his breath, before commenting, “Ya gotta wonder what that Cloud kid was thinking of when he sent you to see me. Sure I was in ShinRa before, but I was ‘let go’ long before he ever joined, so how does he even know me?”

“I don’t know,” Vincent answered honestly. “Even though he asked it of me, I would not have normally went to see you, but my instincts said to follow his request.” He glanced at Cid out of the corner of his eye and at his skeptical expression. “You’ll understand when you meet him.” Maybe he was taking for granted the fact that Cid would know what he meant; maybe he didn’t have instincts the way that Vincent did, however, that was the only explanation he could give.

“Mebbe,” Cid answered, dropping and stamping out his finished cigarette and bemoaning the fact that he didn’t have any more. “It’d better be worth this trip, I’ll say that. A week of walking is a fucking long way and then getting a damn ship to take us to Junon, then another week of walking to fucking Midgar!”

“We wouldn’t be walking if your plane had not crashed,” he pointed out, knowing that he was opening a door to a fight, but not wanting such a thing to be ‘left out’.

“Hey! Don’t knock the Tiny Bronco! She got us from Rocket Town almost all the way to Costa Del Sol!”

“Almost being the key word.”

Cid’s arguing only seemed to get worse at every calm rejoinder from Vincent, but at least his voice hadn’t risen so that he was yelling. Why had he chosen to say something like that when he knew what would come about? Ah well, at least with Cid griping, the pilot wasn’t thinking of other things with which to pass the time that Vincent would likely not like at all.

-0-0-0-

“Why is our luck always shit?” Cid groaned, staring at the monster just ahead of them that, so far, hadn’t noticed their presence.

Vincent studied it, trying to place what it was. “I believe that’s a Grangalan. When attacked, after a certain point, it will spawn a small ‘Jr’ version of itself…then that Jr will spawn a third. They aren’t overly difficult opponents and the smaller the version, the less damage it can take before dying, but they are an annoying sort. They are immune to most status effects, such as sleep, darkness, silence and poison, among a few others.”

“You must be bad luck,” Cid complained, ignoring him.

“I would say the opposite,” he replied calmly. “After all, it was your plane that crashed.”

Before the pilot could offer up an outraged response, Vincent hurried forward to take the creature by surprise. He barely succeeded, but he was satisfied when there was a resounding noise of protest as one of his bullets embedded itself into the side of the Grangalan.

“At least fucking wait for backup!” Cid shouted as he was suddenly beside Vincent with his spear ready and waiting. He did a quick jab forward, managing to land a good one in the creature’s eye. It staggered back in a hop for a second before bouncing forward again and opening its mouth. A silver disk appeared and sliced through the air with almost no sound and Vincent barely ducked in time. His hair was fine, but his cloak wasn’t so lucky. Ah well, one more rip wasn’t going to be noticed.

Cid took advantage of the fact that the creature opened its mouth to allow the silver wheel to boomerang back into it and jumped high, bringing his spear down in a resounding crash on the Grangalan. The sound it emitted as the spear scraped over the hard shell made Vincent almost wince, but instead he let out another few shots to jab at the other eye. With something that sounded remarkably like a growl, the mouth opened again and a smaller Grangalan appeared. Once spawned, he watched as the larger keeled over, its shell falling to pieces.

The pilot landed next to him and grunted a little, wiping sweat off his brow. “I can see now why you said they’re annoying.”

“Quite.”

Five minutes later there was nothing left but a few pieces of shell left on the ground. Cursing to his left caught Vincent’s attention and he noted that one of the silver wheels had clipped Cid’s arm and there was a dark red splotch growing on his shirt. He didn’t have any bandages, so… With a slice of his sharp metal claws, he grabbed a piece off his cloak that was barely hanging on anyway. He wasn’t impartial to his red coat, but realistically, they had to use it to stop the bleeding.

Vincent wrapped around Cid’s bleeding arm and ignored the protests. “Shit! You’re going to cut off blood flow!”

“It has to be tight otherwise it won’t stop bleeding.”

“I know that, but damn!”

“Stop complaining,” Vincent told him. “We have still have a ways to go.”

“Slave driver,” Cid complained…likely on purpose.

The former Turk rolled his eyes and set off without another word, leaving the pilot to hurry to catch up.

Family Ties, Triple Hue

2009-04-06T17:17:20Z

I worked on the beginning two years ago after Dual Tone was done, but never finished it. Now it's done. Hope it's up to par, it's been a long while since I've wrote xxxholic or Legal Drug

Series: Legal Drug/xxxHOLiC
Characters: Kakei, Saiga, Doumeki, Watanuki (mentions of Kazahaya and Rikuou)
Couple: Kakei/Saiga, Doumeki/Watanuki, hints of Kazahaya/Rikuou

Title: Family Ties, Triple Hue
Word Count: 2,709
Chapter: Oneshot
Status: Complete
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I wouldn't have to work any jobs if I owned this...and there were would be much more smut :P
Summery: Doumeki is very mad and it's Saiga's fault. How is Saiga going to fix it?

Saiga had been quite happily napping in the back room of the Green Drug store. It had been a week since he’d seen his cousin at the archery range, but he hadn’t had much chance otherwise, as Kakei had kept him busy. But despite everything, he was happy, mostly. He could still remember those golden eyes that had seemed to smile at him…

…the same golden eyes that were now fixed on him with annoyance, he noticed as he opened his eyes to a looming presence over him.

“Nnngh?” Saiga managed eloquently and yawned widely, wincing at the sudden exposure to the bright light of the office, which had hitherto been dark.

“What did you say to Watanuki?”

“Huh?” he muttered, not anywhere near the mental capacity for speech or conversations after being woken up abruptly from a very sound nap. He shifted a little, scooching up so his back was against one of the armrests and looked up through his sunglasses.

Shizuka appeared perhaps the angriest he had ever seen on his younger cousin. Hands were on his hips and his golden eyes were harsh and unforgiving. Confused, he scratched his head and glanced around the office, but the door was closed and Kakei nowhere to be found.

“What are you talking about?” Perhaps, Saiga conceded, when being woken up unnaturally that he was not the smartest, but he really had no clue what his cousin was talking about.

If anything, at his question, Doumeki Shizuka became even more unpleasant. “Watanuki will barely look at me and has avoided me like the plague all week. When I cornered him finally, he said you came to talk to him. What did you say to him?”

The pieces of the puzzle were finally clicking and when he could see the bigger picture in his head, he groaned. Oh god, what is the deal with this kid? Not that I didn’t expect it, but damn…Does he have to make my job even harder?

“Now, now, Shizuka. I didn’t—”

His cousin did not seem to appreciate his stalling and loomed over him. “What did you say to him?”

“Look, I was just trying to help you out, since you know I love you so much, and I might have let it slip, maybe, that you were in love with him.”

As he had expected, this did not go over very well at all. It was the first time he’d ever heard something akin to a growl come from Shizuka’s mouth. “Saiga, you made things ten times worse. How am I supposed to protect him if he won’t even let me come within twenty feet without turning and running?”

“It’s not my fault that he’s an idiotic twerp who can’t recognize for one, your sexy good looks and two, his own damn feelings.”

“Yes it is your fault, Saiga, and you are going to fix it.”

“…Eh?”

“You are going to fix it,” his cousin repeated with a dangerous tilt to his voice that boded no good.

“Oh, no,” he almost pleaded. “I’ll probably only make things worse. This is for you two to work out—”

“Saiga, you are going to help.”

Oh dear…He dared not argue now that Kakei, who had mysteriously appeared, to make his situation even worse and agreed with Shizuka. They both stared at him with piercing eyes that told him that he’d best do it fast or he would find himself in very dire straits.

-0-0-0-

“Saiga-san…What are we doing here? Is this really one of Kakei-san’s jobs?”

He preferred to ignore Kazahaya’s skeptical look and instead mentally grumbled about when the stupid bell would ring. “Would I lie to you, cutie pie?”

“Yes,” Rikuou answered not a moment later and he winced. Kazahaya might not be the most aware of people, but his partner on the other hand was a little too observant for his peace of mind right then.

“Okay, well…not technically, per se.”

“What’s going on, Saiga-san?”

Saiga sighed and leaned against the sidewalk wall, making sure to keep an eye on the gate and on his watch. School should let out any minute and then he could pounce Watanuki and get it all straightened out so his cousin wouldn’t kill him and he could get in his lover’s pants again… Maybe even in their bed too, for as much as he liked their sofa, three nights in a row was not the best thing for his body or their relationship.

“Well, you see… You remember my cousin Shizuka, right? The one that came into the drug store with a loud-mouth a week or so ago?”

“Yeah…”

He took a moment to compose what he was going to say. Already Rikuou’s expression was slowly turning a tad long-suffering, as if he had an idea where this was going. “I love my cousin very much and I was suspicious of this Watanuki, so I checked him out and then went to have a chat with him. I could have mentioned that just on the off-chance Shizuka was in love with him. So now…Watanuki is avoiding him and this apparently puts a damper on the kid’s life expectancy.”

“And?” Rikuou prompted, though there was a look in his eye that said he already knew what he was about to say.

“Now I have to fix it.”

“Why are we here then?” Kazahaya asked curiously.

“Because it’s your job to catch him.”

“Catch him?”

The bell rang at that exact moment and as Saiga had expected, one of the first people out of the gate was Watanuki, speed-walking as if he feared the hounds of hell were on his heels. As soon as he turned to the left, Saiga’s eyes met that mismatched pair and there was a silent pause. A flinch on that pretty face was their warning and then, with a move almost too swift to see, Watanuki had spun on his heel and was pelting in the other direction.

“Well?” he said to the teenagers next to him. “Go get him!”

Maybe it was because he was conditioned by Kakei, but Kazahaya sped into a run without further prompting. After a second, the heavier footfalls behind him said that Rikuou had joined him in the pursuit of the fleeing high school student.

And damn was he fast! “What is this kid, a track star?!” Rikuou huffed behind him and Kazahaya couldn’t help feeling a bit of satisfaction that he was the faster runner even though Rikuou had longer legs than him. However, it was only a small one because Watanuki was one fast runner and even he was having trouble keeping up.

“Watanuki-san! We only want to talk!” he called, wheezing just a little.

There was only the briefest glance backward, but it gave Kazahaya the chance he needed. The slight slowing was minimal but for someone as fast and nimble as Kazahaya could be, it was perfect. Putting on a sudden burst of speed, he dove forward and his arms wrapped around a slim waist tightly. The unexpected grab knocked them both off balance and with no defenses up, memories slammed into his mind.

The teenage boy paced the room, feeling shivers going down his body for no reason he could name and three times he checked the same ward before he realized what he was doing and just who had put it there. “He’s got to be crazy! No way is that jerk in love with me! He’s after my precious Himawari!”

Watanuki paced even more fiercely, face slowly burning bright red. “Definitely no way! I need to stop thinking about this! No, I wasn’t wondering what it would be like to date Doumeki, never consider it ever! No, that man was just teasing…but why? What if…what if it’s really true? Does he really… Does that mean he wants to…touch me and…”

He stopped pacing abruptly and gripped the area of his shirt over his heart. “I can’t believe…my heart is beating so fast… No! I’m just confused! This will all go away if I avoid him!” An almost soft look came to his face as he glanced at the ward he’d all but abused in the last few minutes. “Besides…I can’t…return his feelings, I love Himawari, so… I should avoid him so he doesn’t get hurt. It’s only…right…right?”

“Get off me!”

Kazahaya blinked, drawn back from the strong memory to reality. He was clutching a flailing Watanuki’s waist as if his life depended on it and his partner… “What took you so long?” he asked his bent-over partner as he gasped for air.

“Not all of us are freaking inhuman, okay?” Rikuou spat, clutching at a stitch in his side. “So damn fast…you’re both insane, you know that right?”

“Would you let me go?!” Watanuki demanded and Kazahaya narrowly avoided a vicious knee jerk into his stomach.

With Rikuou’s help, they got the flailing teenager on his feet, but holding both arms to keep him from bolting again. “Please don’t run, Watanuki-san. Saiga-san just wants to talk to you, okay?”

“Why should I talk to him?!”

“Because they asked nicely,” Saiga told him, waltzing up slowly and ignoring the outraged looks of Kazahaya and Rikuou for taking his time about this. Saiga didn’t run if he could help it; too much energy to waste when he had two strapping teenagers raring to go to do it for him. “Look, we have to talk.”

“No we don’t!”

“You don’t even know what I want to talk about, so how do you know we don’t?”

Watanuki seemed to visibly wilt at that, clearly questioning his sixth sense as to what Saiga was about to grill him on. “Then…”

“Let’s talk about Shizuka.”

An angry glare was sent his way. “So I was right!”

“Lesson one, stick to your instincts,” he teased before growing serious. “You’re a total idiot, you know. From what I’ve heard, without Shizuka around, you’re going to end up dead and being eaten is not a good way to go, you know. He wants to protect you and you’re running away and he’ll be very upset if you die. And think about your own feelings! Why’d you give up your sight for his?”

“Because it was my own fault that he lost it!”

“You can’t expect anyone to believe that it was just responsibility. If it was just that, nobody no matter how good, would ever give up the sight in their eye just for responsibility’s sake. From what I heard, you were very upset about it. Now why would you be upset?”

“Why wouldn’t I be? I’m not heartless!” Watanuki spat, struggling against the arms that held him, but Kazahaya and Rikuou weren’t about to get into another running match.

Saiga wanted to hit the oblivious idiot. “Then why are you running away? You already admitted that you don’t actually hate him, so why would you avoid him?”

“Because…wouldn’t it be painful for him to be around me if what you said was true?”

“And why would you care? Maybe because you’re friends? Maybe…because you think of him as something more?”

“I…don’t…”

Watanuki was visibly wavering and Saiga couldn’t help but wonder why it was so easy. From all he’d heard, this kid was as stubborn as a mule. Had he already started to have his doubts? If that was so, all that was necessary was to go in for the kill, right? However, Saiga hesitated. Was this really his place? He could probably manipulate Watanuki into admitting it, but he wasn’t the one that needed to hear it. And it almost felt like it was cheating in a way.

He stepped up and ruffled that black hair. “I think you have something to say to Shizuka, don’t you? At the very least an apology for avoiding him. He was very upset, you know.” Which was true, just that he had neglected to mention that Shizuka had been upset with him more specifically.

With a wave at the two employees to follow him, Saiga headed off and hoped that this worked. If not, both Shizuka and Kakei would continue to make his life hell.

Kazahaya hesitated and touched Watanuki’s shoulder, making sure his barriers were up so he didn’t get flashed another memory. There was something about this situation that made him feel sympathy for this young boy and not just because he’d seen the conflicting thoughts Watanuki had over what had happened. Why he felt this so poignantly, he didn’t know. That mismatched gaze met his eyes and it almost seemed as if they had a silent conversation, but if asked later, he wouldn’t be able to tell anyone what it was they seemed to ‘talk’ about.

“Hey! Are you coming or not?”

At Rikuou’s words, Kazahaya’s attention jerked and the moment was broken. He nodded at the younger boy and followed after his partner.

-0-0-0-

Watanuki found Doumeki sitting against a tree in the yard of the shrine. For a second he thought the other boy was asleep due to his eyes being closed, until a low voice muttered, “Yes?”

“How’d you know it was me?”

Doumeki opened his eyes and pointed to the eye they shared. Well, it wasn’t surprising, his emotions were going haywire. “Is…it true?”

“Is what true?”

“Do you love me? Saiga-san said…”

There was a moment of silence as the other boy stood up and dusted off his shrine robes. “Yes. He wouldn’t lie about that.”

“Why not?”

“Because we’re important to each other.”

For no reason he could name, Watanuki felt a faint burning in his gut at hearing that. Was that…jealousy? Because Doumeki had family left or…? No, it couldn’t be that he was jealous for any other reason!

“Is it my turn?”

“Your turn?”

“To ask a question.”

Watanuki tilted his head cautiously and narrowed his eyes. “So long as it’s not something stupid…”

“Do you love me?”

“Now that would be an example of a stupid question—”

“Watanuki.”

The look that Doumeki sent him shut up his soon-to-be tirade. Usually it would never do that, but maybe he had wanted to be shut up. He was feeling uneasy about this whole situation, butterflies in his gut going wild. Why on earth would he want to Doumeki to stop him mid-rant? It defied all logic! “I don’t know,” he answered honestly.

“Will you continue to let me protect you at least?”

“…Yes.”

“No more running away?”

“God, I said yes already you jerk!” he snapped, finding some relief that Doumeki seemed happy with that second answer. It only made his cheeks flare into a blush and he growled to cover his embarrassment.

“I want shrimp tempura.”

“I’m not your personal chef, you ungrateful—!”

-0-0-0-

A sudden flood of light once again stabbed at Saiga’s eyeballs through his sunglasses and interrupted his nap. Could he get no sleep?! After blinking and trying to wake his brain up, he muttered, “Shizuka? Is that you?”

“It’s fixed…somewhat.”

“Somewhat is better than broken, right?” he asked, sounding pathetically hopeful to get on his cousin’s good side again.

“…I love you, Saiga, but don’t meddle again. I don’t need help. I’ll get Watanuki to love me on my own, or he won’t love me at all. We’re farther along a little now than we were, but you nearly ruined it.”

It was the most he’d heard from his cousin speak in a long time and he felt truly guilty about what he’d caused. He just wanted to help his Shizuka. He’d always remember that little boy that clung to his pant leg when he was little and remember Shizuka sitting in his lap as they talked with their grandfather. “Sorry, Shizuka. Thought I was helping.”

Doumeki sighed and the tension in his face eased a little. After a moment, he commented, “By the way, is it just me or does that one guy here remind you a lot of Watanuki?”

Saiga snorted loudly. “Kazahaya? Mentally and personality-wise, they could bloody be twins! Oh, on your way out, why don’t you give Rikuou some pointers? He’ll never get Kazahaya into bed at this rate!”

“…You never learn your lesson.”

Saiga gave an unrepentant grin. “Why should I? It’s fun!”

The End

Still Standing, Ch02

2009-04-03T16:05:38Z

Um...

*bows very low* I'm so sorry for the inordinate amount of time it took to get this up. I wrote it shortly after the first chapter, but I didn't like it and didn't like it when I read it. Then Christmas hit and on top of Christmas, my sister decided to monopolize our life and move her into her new apartment (even before the 25th!) And then the new year hit and I had extra work to do at work (though I don't begrudge the money) and I was doing 11 hours day and then we're in the process of selling our house and moving into another and and... *sigh* So yeah...

Real Life Sucks. Anyway, here's chapter 2.

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Vincent, Cid, Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Vincent/Cid, Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Still Standing
Word Count: 2,730
Chapter: Chapter 02/?
Status: Incomplete
Rating: R (for language so far)
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this series, I wouldn't need a job.
Summery: As Cloud goes back to ShinRa, Vincent is left behind...with a piece of paper. Will his curiosity get the better of him to find out who Cid Highwind is? And will the five of them ultimately learn that getting rid of Jenova just isn't that easy?

Vincent climbed into the ‘Tiny Bronco’ with a great deal of trepidation. Traveling from Rocket Town to Midgar was a very long journey, for one thing, and for another, this aircraft looked older than himself. Cid naturally swore for its integrity, which only made Vincent doubt the machine’s capabilities even more. The noise it made as it started up made him wince. It reminded him of someone taking two pieces of blunt metal and rubbing them together, creating the worst grating sound that could make rocks sweat blood.

“You do realize there are mountains and oceans between us and Midgar, correct?” Vincent hated having to do so, but had no choice but to practically shout as Cid had the plane start moving for takeoff. It was the only way to be heard over the racket. At a sharp bump, Vincent immediately grabbed at the metal that connected the wings to the metal body of the plane. He wasn’t sure of flight terminology and he didn’t particularly want to know. All he wanted to know was that they wouldn’t crash land.

“Sure,” Cid shouted back. “We’re going over both of those things!”

And he was sure this wreck could do that? Could it actually go that high without them plummeting for a nasty death in the ground? Somehow he doubted it and Cid’s confident manner surprisingly failed to do anything to relieve those doubts. Despite the long journey, he would have rather traveled on foot. It wasn’t that Vincent was afraid or bothered by heights; Chaos had a fondness for flying when he had control, and even when he didn’t, he enjoyed injecting such a feeling of vertigo and flight into his dreams. No, what Vincent had an argument with was being so high in something that he didn’t think was capable of safety past the first five minutes.

Due to the racket the old plane made as they flew, conversation was nonexistent even if Vincent had felt the need to ‘chat’ with Cid. He did seem to be a competent pilot, if he could make the wreck steady like this, but that was the only concession he was likely to get from the former Turk.

Even more surprisingly to Vincent, after the third hour or so, was they were still in the air. He watched as they came to the nearby Nibelheim mountain range and Cid turned their direction left. Despite the noise that threatened to make Vincent deaf, he watched as the ground beneath them change to an inlet that led to the ocean and another twitch on whatever flight control Cid used had them swerving slowly into a gap between two mountainous regions that lay behind the smaller Mount Nibel.

Vincent had just about chalked up the fact that they had gotten through most of the narrow areas of flight through the mountains and were slowly and gradually being overtaken by flat land when there was a slight jerk to the whole plane. His stomach seemed to plummet to his feet and even through the racket, he heard Cid cursing up a storm. This did not seem good to him…

Slowly but steadily smoke radiated from the motor. At first it was just little wisps, something that Vincent might have dismissed were it not for Cid’s shouting. That told him such a thing wasn’t good. Keeping his eye on it to tell them how bad it was getting, he wasn’t reassured to see the little wisps turn into a steady stream and the gray smoke turning a bit blacker every minute or so.

As the plane swerved dangerously out of control, Chaos couldn’t seem to keep quiet. This, in case you hadn’t noticed, is a bad thing. And you are also, in case you hadn’t noticed, not invincible. This thing crashes while you’re in it, you’re going to die.

And you’re saying this out of compassion? he shot back.

Absolutely not. However, if you die, in a manner of speaking, so do I. My spirit is immortal, this is true, but I don’t want to be trapped in a dead body for eaons until it decomposes enough to escape. Supposing you even do decompose.

You wouldn’t say this if you didn’t have a solution. What is it?

Let me have control. I have wings, I’m capable of flight. You are not. Let me save us both.

Vincent was very leery of any deal that Chaos offered. It seemed to be legitimate, something that benefitted them both, which was what made him worry. He had to look for any particular loophole he could find before agreeing; any single option he might not mention that Chaos could tell him he never asked about after something had happened.

On a few conditions first.

Make it quick, mortal. You don’t have much time.

You will not abandon Cid. You will grab him as well and land him safely on the ground and give me back control.

There was a moment of silence and Vincent had a sense of satisfaction that he had found the area of the bargain that Chaos had been banking he wouldn’t. He could almost feel the vague consternation. Annoying. Fine. Keep in mind that I am only agreeing because I don’t wish to end up ‘dead’ as well.

Vincent sent back that it didn’t particularly matter why Chaos was doing what he was, so long as he did it. An agreement brought on by a mutual threat was often how he interacted with those beasts trapped inside of him. Thankfully his mind, honed to thinking in a certain way because of the Turks training, was able to keep up with them. They were not, Chaos included, exactly trained in the art of subtly and espionage.

He let go of the spokes he held and unbuckled the safety belt. In the short time of his conversation with Chaos, Cid had managed to keep the plan from crashing into the mountainside or the water, but they were heading for a downward spiral toward a nearby grassy plateau and two miracles were apparently enough to use up the pilot’s luck in flying.

Taking a deep breath, Vincent crawled from the small second seat in the cockpit and clung onto the side of the plane. Cid, he thought, was yelling at him for something, but the screaming of the motor drowned him out. With his human hand, he reached out and grabbed the pilot’s jacket. It was only as he was tugging that he realized Cid was still strapped in with his safety belt.

Growing annoyed, Vincent let go and switched hands until his human one kept him on the side of the plane and used his sharp, sharp claws to slice through the straps. It seemed to enrage Cid even more, but Vincent paid him no mind and yanked him out of the cockpit. He kicked off from the side of the plane and waited. For a terrifying second, he thought Chaos had deserted him and they were plummeting into their death.

He shouldn’t have doubted Chaos’ desire to ‘live’. Pain from the transformation staggered through him and he felt, first and foremost, wings ripping through the skin and clothes on his back before his whole body seemed to shudder and change. In moments, a fanged grin was thrown at Cid’s shocked expression. Claws had half ripped Cid’s jacket. Being so sharp, there was little left in the grip. Vincent sent warning thoughts at Chaos about breaking the deal and with a grumble, the monster yanked Cid toward him and wrapped an arm around his waist, holding him like an annoyed parent would carrying a disobedient child home.

With a fearsome puff of smoke and scream of metal, the Tiny Bronco had an intimate meeting with the ground. Far as Vincent could tell, nothing had been on the plateau thankfully. Chaos growled a little and lazily did a few circles in the air over it before acceding to Vincent’s pestering to land. He was sure Chaos wouldn’t have ever done so, if it weren’t for Cid. Cid was a full-grown man and not exactly a lightweight. Nor was he exactly quiet. The only thing either could be thankful for was that at least Cid was not struggling in the grip, otherwise Chaos might have dropped and he wouldn’t want to get into a discussion of if it was done on purpose or not.

As soon as they were on the ground, Cid yanked himself from Chaos’ hold. Much to both their amusement, the pilot’s knees gave out on him and he landed with a ‘huff’ onto the ground. Had Vincent been the teasing sort, he could have had endless fun with that, but as it was, he had bigger things to worry about. Unlike their deal, Chaos was putting up a fight about giving in to Vincent’s control.

Our deal—

Never specified when I had to give back control, only some time after we landed. I’m not as dumb as you seem to think I am, being trapped in this small space that you call a soul for so long.

Chaos! Don’t make me use force!

Chaos threw him an internal frown that he couldn’t see, but felt very clearly as it was followed by waves of annoyance. That would hurt you as well. Your mind would be in agony for the rest of the day.

And so would you. There was silence from Chaos’ end and Vincent threw up some warning mental pressure. You think I won’t do it? He hadn’t been living with these demons in him for so long without learning how they thought, worked, and indeed, he wasn’t defenseless against them. They were his enemy, no matter that they came in handy in fighting and certain other situations.

…I believe you would. Che. If only to spare myself the same agony, you can have your control back.

Vincent would have heaved a sigh of relief that Chaos gave in to him if it weren’t for the fact that even changing back was painful. His clothes were ripped, though still serviceable, and his back was one massive ache. Dried blood ran down and stuck to his skin, but at least going back to himself wasn’t quite as bad as going to Chaos’ form. Even the other three weren’t as bad as him.

He’s picking up human mannerisms, Vincent thought to himself, thinking over Chaos’ ‘che’. Never before had he heard the demon say anything remotely like that. After so many dozens of years and internal conversations, he supposed it wouldn’t be impossible for it to unconsciously seep into Chaos’ speech pattern. Vincent didn’t particularly want to admit it, but that would mean the reverse was also true and that some of Chaos’ mannerisms would have affected him as well.

A hard yank on his arm brought the former Turk right back to reality and he realized that Cid had been ‘talking’ to him, albeit it sounded remarkably like yelling to him, for a good minute or two while he’d been conversing with Chaos and then lost in thought. There was a wild look in the pilot’s eyes that he couldn’t begin to fathom, but what shocked Vincent the most was that he wasn’t recoiling in fear. Instead of being three or more feet away from him, maybe cowering, Cid was right in his face and demanding an explanation at the top of his lungs.

Which was giving him a headache. “I will explain, if you stop shouting,” he said, hoping his calmness would be injected into Cid and the man would become a rational being for once.

There was no luck on rational, but Cid at least moved back so they weren’t nose to nose. He gave an annoyed sigh and crossed his arms. Rough fingers yanked a cigarette from the band of his goggles and stuffed it in his mouth, though he didn’t go so far as to light it just then. Instead, he chewed on it and Vincent could only guess that meant that Cid had far more that he wanted to say, but was restraining himself.

That actually gave just a bit of a notch of respect for the pilot in his estimation. His impression had told him that Cid had no such concept of restraint and that he could at all, even for however long it took before he broke down was something to at least grudgingly admit was in his favor. “Well?!”

This wasn’t a conversation that he particularly wanted to have with anyone, much less Cid who was, more or less, a total stranger. When he contemplated saying nothing, or perhaps even lying though, Cloud’s face floated in his mind’s eye. Oddly enough, he trusted the teenager. Though his body was young, he could see the age and maturity in the man’s eyes. Not to mention that his story rang startlingly true to Vincent’s instincts…and Cloud had sent Vincent to Cid. That had to mean something.

“I was a former Turk. I was shot by Hojo, taken to his lab. The result of his experiments is what you see.”

Cid waited with a tapping of his foot for a good minute or two until it became clear that was all Vincent was going to say. It was true, everything in a nutshell…and it was all the explanation that he was going to give Cid. He wasn’t about to offer details that horrified even himself.

“Wait, that’s it? That’s all you’re going to fucking say?! What about that creature that—”

“Like I said,” Vincent interrupted, sensing a long tirade if he didn’t end it abruptly now. “Chaos came about in the experiments. You asked for an explanation, that is your explanation.”

“You…You have a really shitty personality, you know that?” Cid snapped, finally hunting around his clothes and multitudes of pockets for a lighter. Finding one, he spent an inordinate amount of time almost beating up the little metal lighter until it decided to heed to the cursing and spout a tiny flame. Apparently it needed more oil, but with what Cid was currently saying, anyone would think that the poor creation was the pilot’s mortal enemy and had killed millions.

“I think it is best we press on if we are to make it to Midgar within the year,” Vincent suggested, withstanding the glare with the same fortitude he did everything: by just not caring. “I believe Costa Del Sol is a week’s walk north of us.”

Cid seemed to want to hit him or step on his foot or something equally childish, or so it appeared to Vincent, but thought better of it. The former Turk didn’t stand physical abuse well after what happened to him and he would have had no problem with giving Cid just a little injury back. His mood wasn’t at its best, as he had had a rotten day from the moment he’d laid eyes on the pilot, and he was rather itching to take it out on something. Perhaps a monster in the area would be stupid enough to attack them.

“And how do you know that, are you fucking psychic now?”

“Of course not. Chaos saw it when he watched the plane crash.”

Vincent actually found Cid’s frustration at his calmness amusing, to be honest. He didn’t particularly understand why. Maybe it was because it was unexpected. No one had ever seemed to care that he was the way he was. Cloud, Sephiroth, and Zack didn’t seem to even think about it. Cid, on the other hand, seemed to take an overwhelming exception to the fact that he was calm and expressionless, as if it were somehow a personal insult. That, of course, made Vincent wonder if Cid would be childish enough to make it a goal to get beneath his stoicism.

Rather than waiting for Cid or even saying anything, Vincent straightened his cloak to cover the rents that his change had made in his shirt and started north. He would at least like to have gotten somewhere before dark. The pilot shouted something that Vincent chose blithely to ignore and hurried to catch up with the former Turk’s longer stride. When Cid immediately started to chatter, words broken up with tirades and bemoaning for his precious Tiny Bronco, he knew that before long, he would start to question his sanity.

Still Standing, Ch01

2008-10-01T22:27:12Z

The sequel to Redemption. I left it for a while before re-reading and posting this and I think it sounds good. I have lots of plans for these two and the overall plot to tie in with Redemption. This focuses more on Vincent and Cid this time 'round.

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Vincent, Cid, Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Vincent/Cid, Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Still Standing
Word Count: 3,462
Chapter: Chapter 01/?
Status: Incomplete
Rating: R (for language so far)
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this series, I wouldn't need a job.
Summery: As Cloud goes back to ShinRa, Vincent is left behind...with a piece of paper. Will his curiosity get the better of him to find out who Cid Highwind is? And will the five of them ultimately learn that getting rid of Jenova just isn't that easy?

Vincent Valentine watched the men from ShinRa pack themselves away in the van and drive off. The blond, ‘Cloud Strife’, glanced at him through the rear window, but he turned away. The town of Nibelheim was silent, people completely unaware of what had gone on in the reactor a mere two days ago. He had felt the imminence of what had been told to him, probably more than Sephiroth or Zack Fair. He could feel the truth in Cloud’s words, felt a ringing to his soul, and even the demons inside him calmed somewhat. Probably from some dream he didn’t remember.

He glanced down at the piece of paper that Cloud had pushed into his hand, not really seeing the words. So Lucrecia’s son had survived? Sephiroth Valentine. What an odd name. If Sephiroth was his son. It was entirely possible that it was Hojo’s. His and Lucrecia’s relationship had only been physical one time. Was that one time enough to conceive a child?

The problem was, there were no tests that could be run to prove who’s child Sephiroth was. Both himself and Sephiroth were so completely changed in DNA from any other person that finding any similarities between them was impossible. Neither one of them could really be called ‘human’, in his opinion. Even Zack and Cloud were still ‘human’, despite being mako enhanced. He and Sephiroth were changed so completely that he couldn’t consider them so.

Vincent’s feet had taken control and he found himself staring at the door to the ShinRa Mansion. He’d done what he’d said he’d do; he’d followed Cloud and found out the ‘story’ behind everything. He could go back to sleep with a clear conscience and it wasn’t like there was anything waiting for him. Except…

He lifted the paper up and made himself read the words. ‘Cid Highwind. Rocket Town.’ Cloud had pressed it into his hand just before they’d left. It had been a silent request, to go to the place that had been written. Instead, Vincent had found that the place was superfluous; it was only there so he knew where to find the person. The name Cid Highwind didn’t mean anything to him. Unlike his instinctive knowledge, from a dream probably, of that face that woke him up being ‘Cloud’, nothing came forth at the name Cid Highwind.

He hesitated. Did he really want to go back into the darkness of his dreams? They were endless and cold, omniscient in a way that made him feel oppressed. Chaos was cackling at him, whispering dark words in his mental ears. He couldn’t control any of his four demons except Galian Beast, at least not fully. Galian Beast was completely under his thumb, and a lesser extent and less predictable was Death Gigas. Hellmasker was barely controllable, and Chaos…he remained completely free in his mind and soul, refusing to heel to the higher authority Vincent had, given that it was his body all five of them were inhabiting.

Why don’t you go there? were the whispered words. But coward that you are, you want to play it safe by sleeping. Are you a weakling?

It wasn’t Chaos’ words, though, that prompted him to step away from the front door and head out of town. He wasn’t sure what did it. Maybe it was the worried look on Cloud’s face, how he glanced back time and again as they left when Vincent had said that he wasn’t going to back with them. He didn’t want to have anything more to do with the Turks or ShinRa.

He disappeared into the mountains quickly. As if unsure if he knew where he was going, Cloud had drawn a rough map of how to get to Rocket Town. The quickest way would be going through the caverns and over the mountains, and he didn’t mind if it took him awhile. He was actually enjoying the silence of being by himself as he walked. Just hearing the sounds of life relaxed him.

Though a few monsters waylaid him here and there, it wasn’t something he was particularly concerned about. Quicksilver could handle just about anything of a small to medium proportion. It was old though and because of that, he skirted around such beings as dragons. He’d even found a nest, the sleeping babies obviously waiting for their mother to return with food, which meant the adult would be even worse in a fight. It added a few days’ journey, but that was okay.

Being forced to detour wasn’t so bad, Vincent thought, as he found a broken, battered chest hidden among some rocks. Inside was a Sniper CR, somewhat old but quite usable and a definite jump from Quicksilver. By comparison, the Sniper CR was practically new with how old his trusty Quicksilver was. Sitting down, Vincent spent most of the day repairing and fixing the rifle so it was serviceable. Eying both, he set Quicksilver back into it’s halter on his leg and set about making a makeshift holder for the rifle. He wasn’t about to give up Quicksilver until he’d tested the Sniper CR in actual combat and see how it performed.

Besides, he had sentimental value to Quicksilver.

It took two days for Vincent to navigate himself through the mountain trails, especially since he was also focusing and keeping himself to fights that he was sure he could handle. Chaos and the other demons urged him to not avoid the tough fights that would probably lead to his death, but he figured that was only because they wanted any chance they could get at control of his body so he ignored them. It was gradual at first, the slow changing of hard stone to soft grass and dirt. Greenery quietly beat back the gray of the mountains; trees were more plentiful and reached their branches up to the strong sunlight, as if pleading for more of that life-giving light.

For longer than he cared to remember, Vincent hadn’t seen such sights. In fact, he didn’t even want to know how long he’d been asleep. He did know that it had to have been a long time if Sephiroth, who hadn’t even been born yet when he’d been ‘taken’ by Hojo and nearly killed, was an adult man.

Vincent glanced at the paper. Who was this Cid Highwind? There had to have been a reason that Cloud had told him to seek this person out. Was he a retired scientist that had taken up residence in such a small town as Rocket Town probably was? Unlikely. What could this man he’d never met offer him? And why? Cid Highwind had no idea who he was or that he was even coming. Probably. Had Cloud somehow alerted him before he’d come to Nibelheim? That seemed a little…

With a sigh at all the unanswered questions in his head, Vincent put the piece of paper away and followed the roughly drawn map toward Rocket Town.

-0-0-0-

He had the impression of a hastily cobbled together place and now he could see why it was called ‘Rocket’ Town. The huge, old rocket seemed to be the unofficial town center, even though it didn’t seem to be in the actual center of town. Far as he could tell, it was set somewhat off to the back of all the store buildings and homes.

He stopped next to a man staring at the rocket, making sure that his metal arm was hidden underneath his tattered cloak. “Do you know where I could find Cid Highwind?”

“Ah, he’s in that house over there, nearest the one to the rocket.” Vincent glanced in the direction of the pointing finger to a house that seemed more…well-kept than any other. There was a flowerbed in the front of the building that looked well cared for.

Not wanting to go up to the door without at least knowing more than the name of the person he was supposed to find, Vincent asked, “What is he like?”

The old man looked up at him in surprise, as if he didn’t understand how he could possibly not know about Cid Highwind. Maybe the man was the ‘major’ of the town? That seemed unlikely, considering the town was so small it likely didn’t need one. “Why, he’s the captain of the rocket! Would have been the first man in space, had ShinRa not canceled the program before launch.”

So he was a pilot then. Still, that didn’t give him much information. He wanted to prod for more information, but the old man seemed to ignore him and continued on blithely about the space program and the rocket, when Vincent didn’t care and eventually even wandered away, not that the man noticed.

Now he was even more confused why Cloud had told him to come here. Why would he need to talk to, at the very least, a pilot? Vincent could see no reasoning behind it that made any sense. What could either of them offer each other?

Not wanting to feel like he was procrastinating about the meeting, as that seemed cowardly, Vincent headed for the house, being sure not to step on the flowerbeds. Especially seeing as someone had already done so without care, by the footprints. His knock was quiet, as he wasn’t a dramatic person in general, and already there were quite a few stares from the more nosy people in town.

The door yanked open, the wind that the abrupt move generated ruffling the strands of hair around his face for a brief moment. “Who the hell are you? And damn it, woman, where did you put my socks?!”

The man that was busy yelling over his shoulder was scruffy, looking as if he hadn’t shaved in a day or two, with bright blond hair that was paler than Cloud’s. The shade was the same, but the sun had bleached out a bit of color in Cid’s hair than it had Cloud’s. He was a bit shorter than Vincent and oil stained his dirty and somewhat ripped clothing, as if it had been torn and worn to death but was so loved it couldn’t be parted with. Almost too pale blue eyes looked up at him, sparking with life and what it seemed to be a sort of unconscious ‘assertiveness’. A cigarette was stuck in his mouth, unlit as of yet, and another behind his ear. Goggles were hung around his neck with a careless ease.

Vincent disliked him instantly.

Had he not had such control over his expressions, a hold over from his days as a Turk, his lip would have curled in disgust. He had never felt such an instant emotion, from just a mere look, but there was a first time for everything. Cid Highwind, for this obviously couldn’t be anyone else but him even though he prayed he was wrong, was everything that Vincent had never liked. He took no care in his appearance, his language was vulgar, and he seemed very unreliable.

“Well? Are you mute or something? I’ve got things to do, so if you’ve got something to say, say it.”

“…Do you know Cloud Strife?” It took all his willpower to prevent the disdain from appearing in his voice.

“Never heard of him.”

There was an awkward silence as they stared at each other and Vincent wondered what, by the planet, Cloud was expecting him to do here. Cid had no idea who Cloud was, or who he was. And he, in turn, had no real idea of who Cid was. What did Cloud want him to accomplish by sending him here? Seeing Cid practically glaring at him, he was unsure of what to say or do. He could just walk away right now and no one would fault him, but his curiosity over what Cloud had asked him to do, his dislike of Cid notwithstanding, prompted him to stay and find out. Surely there had to be a reason he was requested to go here.

“May I come in?”

“Why the fuck should I let you? I don’t even know you’re name! And damn it, Shera, where the hell are my socks?!”

Cid stormed back into the house, leaving the door open and Vincent heard a voice carry somewhere from the back. The voice was of a woman, and sounding incredibly calm in the face of Cid’s apparent rage at having a lack of socks to wear. “They’re on the top of your dresser where I always put them.”

Deciding to take his opportunity, Vincent stepped into the house and closed the door politely behind him. The house seemed to be in the midst of a war. One area was perfectly clean and right across from it seemed to be controlled chaos. If he had to guess, seeing Cid throw a shirt to the floor out of the corner of his eye from a bedroom, it was probably ‘Shera’ who kept the house clean and Cid who did the destroying of it.

A glare was blistering in its heat as it was sent Vincent’s way, but he was entirely unruffled by it, merely staring it down. Cid seemed even more outraged that he’d walked in on his own. It was as if he expected Vincent to just go around his house and randomly steal or trash it.

Cid came out hopping on one foot a moment later as he tried to pull his socks on and walk at the same time, having very little success at such an endeavor. “Who—”

Before Cid could ask another swear-filled question, Vincent interrupted. “My name is Vincent Valentine. Cloud Strife sent me to see you.”

“I don’t know either—”

“Ah, are you a friend of the Captain’s?”

Entirely ignoring the tirade sent her way, a woman came out from the kitchen with a tray in her hands. She was fairly pretty, with glasses that sat on the bridge of her nose, and her brown hair was tied in a bun at the back of her head. Her expression was pleasant and she sat down the tray with a calmness that perfectly countered the chaotic actions of Cid.

“No. I was sent here to meet him.”

“Oh really. Please do sit down.”

“Shera! Don’t just invite everybody in for tea, he could be a fucking axe murderer for all we know!” Cid snapped, sitting down in his chair with a huff of annoyance, especially when it appeared as if Shera was quite happy ignoring what he was saying.

Well he’s partially correct at any rate, Vincent thought, thinking of Hellmasker and the demon’s favored chainsaw. Not quite ‘axe murderer’, but he was hardly a vision to inspire confidence in peace and prosperity. Sometimes Hellmasker could be incredibly vicious with that chainsaw if he got control. When he’d first realized how many demons were in him, and he’d accidentally let Hellmasker have control, Vincent had found himself coming to his own consciousness in the midst of carnage of several monsters. They had been carved into tiny pieces and he’d been covered with bits of blood and skin and even what he thought were brains.

He’d quickly gone back to his coffin after that incident.

“Here’s some tea.”

Shera’s words dragged Vincent from his thoughts. It appeared that the hot tea had calmed Cid down remarkably, much to his amazement. Though he still grumbled and curse words still littered his speech, the very bearing and tightness in his shoulders had eased and he was relaxing in his chair, feet propped up on the edge of the table. “Well, since Shera’s all but invited you to live with us, I guess you can stay for some morning tea. Now…who the hell is Cloud Strife and why would he send you to me?”

Vincent pondered how to answer this question. He clearly couldn’t blurt out what Cloud had told him. For one thing, it wasn’t his story to tell, and for another, Cid would likely think him crazy. It would have helped immensely if Cloud had just told him why he was going to see Cid Highwind, but Vincent did acknowledge that if he had, he’d have likely found a way of not going. It was all the fault of his curiosity.

“I’m not sure,” he finally said truthfully. “He merely handed me a piece of paper with your name on it and where to find you. He didn’t explain anything as to why I should seek you out. I had assumed that perhaps you knew him and could explain that to me.”

Cid scratched his stubbled chin and shrugged. “Dunno him. I don’t even know how he knew about me. I’m just some two-bit pilot that was left behind when ShinRa canceled the space program. Even if I’m one hell of a pilot.”

There was a telltale bitterness to Cid’s voice that Vincent recognized in his own feelings. Though he didn’t think he could ever like the crass captain, at least he could sympathize. Somewhat. The silence grew, neither Cid nor himself having any ideas as to where to go next. Again, it was awkward and Vincent was considering excusing himself when Shera broke into the conversation, with less tact than he’d thought she’d have.

“Why don’t you just contact Cloud Strife and ask him? Do you know where he is?”

“I believe he’s back in Midgar by now, with his troop.”

“Troop?” Cid narrowed his eyes. “By troop, you mean…”

“Cloud Strife is a 3rd class SOLDIER in ShinRa. He has a…very close relationship with the General and his second in command.”

There was a bout of cursing from the pilot, most of which Vincent found incomprehensible. It didn’t appear as if he was intending to say anything, other than just spout of foul words to alleviate some frustration or anger or irritation. A definite lack of self-control, Vincent added to the list of things he did not like about Cid.

“What the hell does a SOLDIER 3rd class want with me? Even when the space program was still active, we didn’t have any dealings at all with SOLDIER, or Turks for that matter!”

“I don’t know. You’d have to ask him,” Vincent stated mildly and took his first sip of the tea placed in front of him. It wasn’t bad, though it wasn’t something he could call great either. He wasn’t much of a tea person, though he didn’t dislike it.

“Then that’s exactly what I’ll do!”

The silence at the table after that announcement was absolute until Shera stood up. “I’ll pack a few things for you. Even with the Tiny Bronco, it’ll take you awhile to get there.”

Vincent watched, his open mouth hidden by the top of his red jacket. Shera’s equability about the sudden declaration had him absolutely stumped. She didn’t try to persuade him out of it or even give him suggestions. “…Your wife is very supportive…”

“Hell, Shera ain’t my damn wife! I’d never marry her even if we were the last two people on the planet!” At Vincent’s look, Cid shifted in his chair, seeming a bit embarrassed. “On my better days, I’d say she’s an okay gal, but most of the time, I don’t even know what to do with her. Sometimes she gets on my nerves and other times, very occasionally, she’s invaluable. I could never marry her, though. We’d probably end up killing each other.”

“Somehow I doubt that,” Vincent muttered under his breath. “I don’t see how you’re planning—”

“We.”

“…Excuse me?”

“We, pal! You’re coming with me.”

A dread filled Vincent’s stomach. He didn’t want to go back to Midgar. If Hojo ever caught wind of him… Not to mention it would bring back too many memories of his past life. The fact that he’d liked being a Turk. Not that he was vindictive and enjoyed killing people, but more the tiny family that he’d formed amid the members. It had been like an island unto itself at one time and had provided a sanctuary when he needed it. To go back and face all those memories and feelings was an almost impossible task.

“I don’t think—”

“Look! You were the one that came crashing into my house because this guy Cloud Strife told you to. So we’re going to go see him and demand to know what the hell is going on.” Cid dropped his feet to the floor and stood up, stretching every inch of his body to work out all the perceived kinks.

“If you can get past his boyfriend.”

“What?”

Vincent glanced up as Cid turned around a little at his muttering. “Nothing.”

“Shera! Woman, are you done yet?!”

“Just about, Captain.”

This was going to be a very long journey.

Redemption, Ch17

2008-08-31T23:17:58Z

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 2,813
Chapter: Chapter 17/17
Status: Complete
Rating: R
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

Though it would have been more beneficial to wait until the rain let up, Cloud refused to let them have that option. Instead, he charged straight out and headed up to the trail leading into the mountains in back of the mansion. Vincent shrugged his red cape up a little more before he too stepped into the driving rain, his expression not quite changing much.

Zack personally had a few more misgivings about this, but he couldn’t let his friend and his…friend’s friend go out there by themselves, so he followed. Maybe it was because he was ‘told’, but he just didn’t feel the urgency. Sure, the story was horrific, but he didn’t feel anything more than mild alarm. He trusted Sephiroth; he’d known the man since they were both teenagers in the war with Wutai. The man he knew would never be weak-willed enough to be controlled unless there were extreme circumstances.

Which by all accounts, in Cloud’s other ‘future’, there were. Part of him wondered about the differences between what happened to create that future and the current present. Zack couldn’t imagine that his other self would have acted any differently then than he did now. So if it wasn’t him, what other million things could have contributed to Sephiroth going insane? It didn’t make any sense to him, the idea that Sephiroth could just go around killing innocent people and wanting to destroy the planet not computing.

“Zack, hurry up!”

“I’m not a monkey like you; if I hurry, I’ll slip and break my neck!” he shouted back, striving to get his voice over the howling of the wind through the mountains, the nearby caverns making it sound louder and more ominous than it really was. He honestly really hated it when his feelings were right about missions. This was becoming really complicated.

Vincent beckoned to them with a gold-colored metal arm, apparently deciding he wasn’t going to raise his voice for the sake of being heard over a storm. Cloud hurried to his side, having an agility to him over the slippery rocks that Zack envied. It probably came from growing up in this environment, aided by the fact that he now had mako enhancing his system. It wasn’t as easy for him.

They waited for him, though Cloud was fidgeting impatiently the whole while. What Vincent had found was a bridge. It was very old, the only things holding the planks of wood up being water-logged and decrepit looking ropes. It was swaying slightly in the rain. With his sight enhanced with years of mako injections, Zack could seen enough through rain over the distance and know that it wasn’t going to last if one of them put even so much as one foot on there in this weather.

“I’m going to guess that’s the fastest way there,” Zack yelled to Cloud. A glum nod was his response, yellow spikes of hair so soaked that it was actually lying flat against his head. Even Zack’s had not managed to withstand the barrage of water.

With a glare at the bridge, Cloud turned and led them into a nearby cavern. Zack didn’t even have to blink to adjust to the gloom, considering how dark it was outside to begin with. Still, darkness didn’t hide much with his sight and he glanced around, seeing that the cave was actually a convoluted system linking many like it, probably all throughout the mountain. The noise was cut significantly in roar, to be replaced by the wind’s sound being somewhat more hollow and ‘ghost-like’.

It didn’t faze him.

Glad he didn’t have to shout, Zack asked, “I hope you know the way through here. We could get lost for two weeks.”

“I mapped out this whole place when I was younger and everything about Nibelheim is burned into my memory. I couldn’t get us lost if I tried.”

Vincent, Zack noted, didn’t say much even when they didn’t have to shout to be heard and Cloud seemed too tense, so not much was said as they traversed the inside of the mountain. He couldn’t help going back over the wonderings of what had all gone so wrong in that other place Cloud was from. It seemed like one struggle after another, one huge pain dealt in small blows. No wonder Cloud was sometimes so quiet and sad when he thought he was unobserved. If he was thinking about that other time, it wasn’t surprising. For all the bad stuff that Zack saw in the present, it wasn’t anywhere like that.

They had half an hour of protection from the storm before they were back out in it again, Cloud leading them mercilessly on and not allowing a break. Zack was worried, he couldn’t deny that; his friend’s anxiety was infecting him. He wanted to find Sephiroth, but at the same time, he was absurdly confident that his General wouldn’t succumb to anything of the sort, especially not after hearing that story.

The reactor loomed in the distance and Cloud put in a burst of speed, reaching it in record time through the storm. They were all sopping wet and Zack took a minute to shake out his hair when they stepped inside, though the amount of life within it didn’t so much as twitch and remained flat against his skull and back.

“Tifa…?”

“Cloud!”

Zack glanced to the left at the girl huddled, sitting on the floor and shivering. “So that’s how Seph got here. He got himself a guide.”

“At this time of night?”

It was the first time Vincent had spoken since leaving the mansion and Zack shrugged at him. “Seph is very persuasive. My guess is as soon as we were told what had happened in the Inn, he went out and asked where he could find a guide with the Innkeeper and got one all right.”

Vincent had been told what had happened and Zack had noticed that when looking for an emotional response to note the eyes. During the second telling Cloud had been forced to do, the expression didn’t change but Vincent’s eyes would widen or narrow depending on what he felt for a split second. His calmness hadn’t changed any, but Zack thought it was good to know that Hojo didn’t break everything in the other man. He didn’t need to be told what happened to Vincent; he could make a pretty damn good educated guess from his own experiences and what he saw in the labs.

“…you didn’t write me to tell me you’d be coming to Nibelheim,” Tifa finished, Zack blinking as he realized he’d tuned out the very short conversation. Cloud was clearly using will alone to stay in one place and not sprint to Sephiroth. Knowing what he did of their relationship, the story having been embellished during their time going through the mountain, he figured it was only because of a feeling of loyalty that kept him in one spot.

“Sorry Tifa, can’t talk now.”

Zack hurried after Cloud, throwing a nod to the bewildered girl and hearing the sounds of Vincent’s metal shoes hit the metal walkway beneath their feet. For all that, Vincent moved far more quietly than he’d expected. In fact, he was almost silent incarnate.

Cloud continued, but both he and Vincent paused in the room they came to, peering into the little porthole-shaped window into the capsules. Zack felt his stomach turn a little at the sight and promised that as soon as they got back to ShinRa, he was going to talk to someone about this. Now he was beginning to understand why something might have started Sephiroth into reading on his own past and getting corrupted. To think you might have been one of these things…they looked like a mix between monster and man.

“…How could ShinRa continue to fund such a corrupt man that would make these things?”

Zack glanced at Vincent and frowned. “I don’t think they know about this. At least Rufus ShinRa doesn’t. If we’re lucky, knowing how Rufus hates Hojo, we might get something done about it when we get back.”

“We?”

“Aren’t you coming with us?”

Vincent only looked at him before they finally headed after Cloud. He wasn’t sure if that silence meant the other man was thinking about going back or if he was most assuredly not going to. Had he been in Vincent’s shoes, he’d be torn. He’d want to shred Hojo limb from limb for what he’d done, but at the same time, not want to be anywhere near the man who had caused him such harm.

“Oi, Seph!” Zack called, when his gaze spotted his friend in the heart of the reactor. Cloud was frozen in place, his face white as a sheet, and Zack felt his heart sink a little in worry when he saw why.

Sephiroth was standing in the middle of the walkway leading to a vat of some kind with a body in it. A body who’s head was currently in his General’s hands. That silver-haired head lifted to look at them and for once, Zack wished that Sephiroth used facial expressions more. Never before had he really disliked that ‘poker’ face of his friend’s as he did now, because it never gave him any idea of what Sephiroth was thinking.

“Hey, uh…what are you doing?”

His hand shot out, remaining hidden behind Cloud in front of them, to grip Vincent’s wrist and prevent it from moving. He’d seen the motion the other man had as he put his hand on the hilt of his gun. He was not about to let anyone go overboard until he was absolutely sure of what was going on. So far, all he saw was Sephiroth holding a head. That was it. No dead bodies and in fact, Tifa was completely unharmed with the exception of freezing cold from the storm. From Cloud’s recount, she’d been sliced across the chest when this had happened ‘before’.

Sephiroth glanced at Vincent, as if well aware of the motion the man had had to grip his gun, which Zack wouldn’t have found surprising. His senses were ten times as keen as any SOLDIER in ShinRa…and now they knew why. With a shake of his head, Sephiroth knocked a few strands of wet hair from his eyes and lifted up the head in his hands.

Much to Zack’s surprise, Cloud didn’t make a sound. He didn’t even reach for his weapon. One look at the tenseness of his neck and Zack knew right then that if Sephiroth had gone insane and they had to fight, it would be him by himself, with maybe Vincent’s support. Cloud couldn’t raise his hand to his lover, not now. His feelings, which at any other point would have been his strength, had become his weakness now. He’d be unable to do what was needed, unable to bear the pain a second time.

If it was needed.

It was a split second and they watched as Sephiroth tossed the head he held into the mako pit beneath them. Zack peered over the railing, having expected some sort of shriek or something from this ‘Jenova’ thing, but it was utter silence. Just a faint ‘plop’ sound as the head hit the mako far below them and sank, disappearing into the green. “Okay then…”

Sephiroth shrugged, his unreadable expression relaxing just a little. “Everything seemed to stem from ‘Jenova’ and revolving around her head. If there is no head, how can I go insane from it?”

Whatever feeling that had held Cloud as still as a statue shattered and the young man shot forward, all but throwing himself into his lover’s arms. Zack grinned when he saw the surprised look on Sephiroth’s face. Well, wasn’t that…cute? He’d never seen Cloud actually cling to Sephiroth before, burying his face in that broad chest despite everyone being soaking wet.

“Are you all right, Cloud?”

When there was no answer forthcoming, Zack chuckled and let go of Vincent’s wrist, only to put his hands in his pockets and casually lean against the railing. “He’s been completely out of his mind with worry after you left and didn’t tell us. He thought maybe by telling you, he’d either driven you insane or that you were going to break up with him.”

That one definitely stumped Sephiroth, he could tell. “Break up with him? Why would I do that?”

“Gee, I dunno, Seph. Maybe because he had told us a story where he killed you three times? I mean, that sort of stuff doesn’t exactly inspire romantic feelings in someone. Sort of kills the mood.”

A faint smile touched chiseled features and Sephiroth wrapped his arms tightly around Cloud’s shivering form. Whether he was shivering from cold or release of worry, Zack didn’t know. He glanced at Vincent and looked to the door. There was a silent nod and they quietly stepped out to leave the two lovebirds some privacy.

For his part, Sephiroth felt bad for the fear he had caused Cloud, but he had honestly thought Zack would keep their friend busy for an hour or two and he’d be back before they were aware he was gone. It was a simple thing to find a guide, come to the reactor, get rid of the head, and go back, or so he thought.

“I apologize,” he whispered.

“You should,” Cloud agreed, the faintest of laughs coming out, but he knew that his boyfriend didn’t find anything funny about this situation. “I thought…I thought you…Shit, I thought I’d failed again.”

“Was it thinking you’d failed that made you fear?”

“Absolutely not!” Cloud shot back, finally lifting his head. Spirit filled blue eyes, a conviction that pushed any doubt Sephiroth had away. “It was because I didn’t want to lose you!”

“My mistake,” he said instead, feeling relaxed now that he knew that the Cloud in his arms was the same one he’d fallen in love with. He’d seen glimpses of this spirited and challenging Cloud before, but it was always buried beneath other things: shyness, worry, duty, even love. Away from the confines of ShinRa, in an area of the world that Cloud knew intimately and held such power with him and over him, it felt as if they were more equal than they’d ever been.

“Do you feel better?”

“About what?”

“That you don’t have to hide any longer, or do it all yourself?”

Cloud paused, tilting his head as he thought about it. Eyes glanced around the reactor room, as if seeing it in an entirely new light. “You know,” he commented. “I don’t know what’s going to happen now. Now that I don’t…I feel lighter somehow. You’d think I’d feel heavier because I don’t know what’ll happen, but…”

“That’s the way it should be, Cloud. Nobody should know what’s going to happen before it does.”

“Guess that means I’m like everybody else now, huh?”

“Not entirely. You have something no one else does.”

Cloud looked at him in surprise. “What’s that?”

“My love.”

Much to Sephiroth’s surprise, Cloud started laughing and only hugged him harder. “That’s so cheesy! But I like it anyway.”

Sephiroth basked in the silence as the laughter died away and a relieved joy came back. He’d felt nothing, heard nothing, saw nothing unusual as he tossed the head into the mako. He didn’t know what that would do, but if something untoward happened, they would just have to take care of it when it happened. Knowing what he did, Sephiroth didn’t believe in worrying over something until it was clear that something was going to happen.

“We had best go before Zack comes back in to get us.”

“Yeah.” As they let go, Cloud’s death grip not fazing Sephiroth much, there was a smile cast his way. “Sephiroth?”

“Yes?”

Lips were placed on his and he happily gave himself up to the kiss. It was sweet, but promised of more and his gaze darkened in interest. “I love you.”

“I know.”

“Hey you two!”

“Coming, Zack!” Cloud called when the black-haired man’s interrupted their silence yet again.

Sephiroth watched him go, pausing to look behind him at the body still floating in the broken, clear container. The thought of that ugly carcass being his ‘mother’ made him shudder. Hearing what he’d done, at first he’d had a hard time believing it. Until he’d actually seen the corpse, it had just been a story. The fact that it was here like Cloud had said, looked exactly as he had said it would, had firmed his belief of his boyfriend’s words.

Stepping out of the room, with a shrug of dismissal at the silent body, he watched Zack and Cloud in a playfight in the room beyond. Eyes calmly watched the blond and he couldn’t help whispering a heartfelt ‘Thank you’.

The End

Okay, well...it's done. Yes, I am serious. Yes, I know you'll likely want more. I know I do. I was going to do smutness with Cloud and Seph, but it just didn't fit in the story and I've gotten to the point that I had wanted to be, the changed history.

I'm contemplating doing a sequel (haven't decided if I will), but if I did do one, it'd follow Vincent and likely Cid, because I am a definite VinxCid supporter. Might even throw in some Tseng/Rufus occasionally since I am a huge supporter of those two, they're so cute...in their own way. :P If I did one. There are vague ideas going around in my head. Nothing firm in terms of plot or anything, but just...an idea.

I've just about exhausted SephxCloud in my mind currently. I love them to death, but writing this story was like pulling teeth. I love to read about them, but writing them has somehow proven difficult for some reason. Or maybe it was just this story. Usually when I start a story and I get a rhythm, it just works. As those who read "Embodiment" know, I usually just am able to chuck out the chapters in a timely fashion. This fic nearly defeated me several times, to the point that there were actually months in between chapter updates, which I loathe doing to those that like my stuff and want to read it. I'm hoping that if I did a sequel, it wouldn't be so obstinate.

All in all, though, I'm extremely pleased at how well this story turned out. It's very much the story I had wanted to write, despite the trouble it gave me. The little chibis of Zack, Seph, and Cloud that sat on my head and shoulders giving me advice are a little wore out since I made them work so hard :P

And though I usually don't do this or say stuff like this, since I get my stories so quickly for the most part and people don't have to worry, I do apologize and thank you very much for sticking with this and supporting me. I really do hope this story was worth the wait (and despite my reservations, part of me hopes that I'll come up with something firm enough to write a sequel because I adore my VinxCid).

Redemption, Ch16

2008-08-25T19:45:43Z

More cliffage!

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 4,399
Chapter: Chapter 16/17
Status: Complete
Rating: R
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

“I what?”

Cloud hung his head to avoid seeing the confused and unhappy frown marring Sephiroth’s good features. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw an even more nonplussed look on Zack’s face. “Who’d Sephiroth kill?”

Where did he start? There was so much to say… “I guess I should start by saying that I’m not…well, normal. Remember how you said I woke up differently? I’m sort of…not from here.” Seeing he was only making this even more unclear, he sighed. “My mind is actually twenty three years old. You see, I talked with this strange woman and she gave me this vial and it sent me back to the past and—”

“Okay, slow down kiddo,” Zack interrupted, sitting up and rubbing his head. “What does this got to do with Seph killing people?”

Cloud’s shoulders slumped. He had absolutely no idea how he was going to explain this with any coherency. “Um…let me start this a different way. The last time I was sixteen, I hadn’t made it into SOLDIER. I was still a regular trooper that was sent along with the General and a SOLDIER 1st named Zack Fair. We went to Nibelheim because of a problem with a reactor.

“Once there, General Sephiroth found some books left behind by Hojo and his teacher, Professor Gast. He learned that they had found what they had thought was an Ancient. Her name was Jenova. They were doing tests and experiments when Gast found a real Ancient and learned that Jenova wasn’t an Ancient, but a ‘calamity from the skies’. Basically she was the enemy of the planet and the Ancients. Taking this Ancient with him, Gast and her escaped, leaving Hojo in charge of the experiments.

“Hojo, he…” This was the really difficult part and he swallowed thickly. “He convinced his wife, who was pregnant, to allow him to infect the womb with Jenova cells. Her name was Lucretia. She was told after the child was born that he’d died, though I don’t know if she ever believed Hojo. The child was named…Sephiroth.”

Cloud couldn’t help pausing in his narrative to look at his lover, but there was nothing in his face to give him any hint as to what the man was feeling. It made his stomach clench up, because he didn’t know whether to continue or not. Well, he couldn’t stop, they’d probably kill him, but he had no idea what he was saying was causing. He could imagine this wasn’t easy to hear, but only Sephiroth knew what he was feeling or what he would do.

“Wait a second, you’re saying this as if it’s already happened and you said this was when you were sixteen. You just turned fifteen a few weeks ago!” Zack protested.

He glanced at the black-haired SOLDIER. “Like I said, my mind is twenty-three years old. I was sent back to this time, back to what I know as the past, to try and fix what went all wrong. I went to sleep one day when I was twenty-three and the next, I was fourteen.”

“But that—”

“Let him continue, Zack.”

Sephiroth’s words silenced the other man and Cloud gulped audibly. “According to Sephiroth of back then, he was told that his mother was Jenova, which I suppose in a way was true, because he had so many of her cells in him. Lucretia…died shortly after being told what happened to her baby. Anyway, most of what happened to Sephiroth, I’m sure is the same as right now. Back to when I was sixteen…When we came up to Nibelheim to check on the reactor, Sephiroth found the basement in the mansion with all the books, but they weren’t right.

“They were written when they assumed Jenova was an Ancient. Gast didn’t leave any writings after he found out that Jevona wasn’t one, because he’d run away from ShinRa. So what Sephiroth was reading wasn’t true, but it…well…I don’t really know for sure what happened, because I’m not Sephiroth, but the books, the false information, the idea that he’d been created in such a way, thinking he was a monster…It drove him insane.

“He started attacking and killing everyone in Nibelheim, burning it to the ground and heading for the reactor. Jenova’s body was kept there. To make a very long story somewhat shorter, Sephiroth managed to reach the inner chamber and pulled Jenova’s head off. He was saying things like he was meant to rule the planet. Zack kept trying to reason with him, but he was severely injured. I…I stabbed him. I stabbed Sephiroth. I think it was only sheer surprise that I succeeded when I attacked. He…stabbed me back and then jumped into the mako beneath, clutching Jenova’s head.

“Hojo found Zack and I unconscious in the mako reactor and we were brought to the basement of the ShinRa mansion. For five years we were experimented on. Hojo seemed shocked that I had managed to ‘kill’ Sephiroth and I guess he wanted to figure out how I succeeded when a SOLDIER 1st hadn’t. I didn’t take to the mako well, but Zack was at least able to keep his mind in some semblance of order. He finally got us both out, though my mind was gone. I was aware of what was going on to some extent, I could see, but I couldn’t move my body at all.”

Realizing he was rambling, Cloud reigned in his story to be more concise. This was as painful as he expected it to be and he found the pattern of the blanket on the bed to be far more interesting looking at than either of the two other men in the room. Fingers picked at the threads idly. “Anyway, the Turks were told we’d broken out and they went hunting. They found us. Zack protected me, but he ended up dying. They thought I was already dead, so they left me there, out on the outskirts of Midgar. My mind was so messed up that I thought I was Zack and my memories got all screwed around.

“Anyway, some stuff happened and we found out that Sephiroth wasn’t dead, at least not in the strictest sense. I couldn’t help it; I had to stop him before he was killing more people. He’d already come through ShinRa while me and a few others were being held in cells and…in a way, I guess he let us out, or at least me. My cell was unlocked when I woke up. There was a blood trail, leading up and…Masamune was sticking out of President ShinRa’s back.

“More stuff happened as we kept following Sephiroth, all the way up to the Northern Crater where they’d found Jenova to start with. All the five years in the mako tubes with Hojo had given me abilities like a SOLDIER 1st and with Zack’s expertise in my head… I tried to confront Sephiroth several times, but I was completely taken over because we shared Jenova cells. Hojo had infected me too, but Sephiroth had so much… By the time Sephiroth had found out that Jenova wasn’t an Ancient, it was already too late to bring him back from the insanity. Instead of wanting to rule the planet, he had decided on destroying it, trying to find the Black Materia to bring down meteors.

“Long story shorter again, I was forced to give up the Black Materia to Sephiroth and was lost in my head for awhile before I finally sorted out that I’d never made it into SOLDIER and that I was using Zack’s memories and not my own. Thanks to Aeris, who Sephiroth…killed, we had the Holy Materia and we, some friends and I, headed up to the Northern Crater to finally fight Sephiroth for the last time, or so I hoped. It took…a very long time and more will than I thought I had. I’d always, always looked up to Sephiroth as an idol of mine, and to kill him even though he was insane…

“Anyway, we did eventually save the planet and Holy stopped Meteor, but Midgar was destroyed. Edge soon propped up around Midgar where people were living. A disease was hitting people indiscriminately, even I was infected. We called it Geostigma. When the body fought too hard against anyone supposedly infect with Jenova cells, or something like that. Vincent explained it to me once, but I didn’t really get it. All I knew was that it was killing people, children, me. And three clones of Sephiroth’s were trying to create another reunion, get everyone together so they could resurrect Sephiroth for ‘mother’. Mother being Jenova. In essence, Kadaj was sort of Sephiroth in ‘larvae’ form.

“They’d hunted up Jenova’s neck and when he absorbed the extra cells, he…became Sephiroth for a short time. This time I had to fight him by myself. I didn’t know if I could do it by myself, but I think I succeeded because Sephiroth was in a body that wasn’t really his. I, we, had already obliterated that. The last thing he told me before he disappeared was that…he would never be a memory. I knew it meant that we’d be fighting, probably again and again. At that time, I was twenty-three and savior of the world notwithstanding, I knew that we’d never stop fighting. We had developed this sort of…symbiosis. I never said anything, but sometimes I used to wonder if it was because somehow he was living through me that he kept coming back. I thought about killing myself, but then I wondered if I was dead and he came back, who would stop him? What if me dying didn’t stop him from coming back?

“I was still feeling lost when I was given a vial that said I could go back into the past. That maybe I could prevent it. However, it was a double-edged sword. If I risked it, it meant that if I couldn’t stop it somehow, it could end up ten times worse. Even with Aeris’ death, Zack’s death, the destruction of Midgar and everything we went through, I knew it could be so much worse. We’d gotten off lightly, with what Sephiroth was capable of doing.”

He could feel the heavy stares on him now that he was coming close to the end of his story and his hands balled into fists. “But I wanted my mentor back so badly. I remembered what Sephiroth was like before and…I risked it. Without asking anyone’s opinion or advice, I drank it and woke up when I was fourteen again. When I fainted, I was just so…overwhelmed. To see Sephiroth back as he should have been…

“Things are different now. I’ve made it into SOLDIER, though I hadn’t before. I know, really know, Sephiroth.” As much as Cloud didn’t like it, he didn’t think he could say any of this if he didn’t act like Sephiroth wasn’t in the room. “I panicked in the hospital room when I saw Sephiroth leaving and told him I loved him. I hadn’t known at the time that those words would become true. I’d never met Sephiroth more than three times before and suddenly we were friends and spiraling to something far more…

“One day I realized that I’d never really known Sephiroth; that the feeling of ‘betrayal’ that I’d had was a pale thing indeed compared to the pain that Zack must have gone through, seeing Sephiroth go insane. Now that I know him, now that we’re…more than friends, I can’t bear the thought that something would happen to him. If I fail to stop it, everything that I love in Sephiroth will die and I don’t think that I’d have the heart to stop him again.

“I was expecting this mission to Nibelheim to happen when I was sixteen. I’d…expected it to happen there. I had no proof, but I just thought it would. When it didn’t, I…I’m at a loss now. I don’t know what’s going to happen. If I don’t know what’s going to happen, how can I protect Sephiroth? I’ve been working so hard to get back to the point where I was when I was in my twenty-three year old body, but it’s hard work. I still don’t have the strength to be equal just yet and I…

“So now you know.”

Every second of silence was like a stabbing pain through him. Sephiroth hadn’t said a word and when Cloud risked a glance up, his face was completely unreadable. It made his insides quake with fear and something that had never occurred to him to worry about came to his mind. His hands suddenly started to sweat as he realized even if Sephiroth didn’t go insane from what he said, that he could have ruined their entire relationship. Knowing that you’d gone insane and the person you now loved had killed you several times…could you remain with that person?

“Excuse me, I need to think.”

Cloud nearly jumped up to follow as Sephiroth stood from his chair and left the room, but Zack grabbed his arms and made him sit back down. “Give him time to think, you gave us a big whammy.”

“And what do you think?”

Zack stared at him and Cloud didn’t bother to hide his anxiety. He hadn’t even thought that maybe they wouldn’t believe him; he knew they would, they trusted him to not lie about something like this. A faint smile was sent his way and Zack ruffled his hair fondly. “I think that you’re one hell of a brave guy and I’m honored that you thought you were me.”

Before he knew it, Cloud found himself laughing, in utter relief. There was just something inane about the comment. Thinking he was Zack was such a minor portion of what he’d said, but trust Zack to use that as a way to dissolve tension for a moment. His laughter faded away after a minute. His worried feelings weren’t just for what he’d said, but that Sephiroth had just left. He really did love that man and the thought that they’d break up sent shivers of fear down his spine.

“Zack…do you think that Sephiroth will be okay?”

Zack sighed and shrugged. “To be honest, I don’t have a clue. I mean, I can only imagine what it’s like to know that you went insane at one point and killed a whole bunch of people, including your friend and your friend’s girlfriend. All I do know is that we need to leave him be. I’ve seen that mood before and you’ll only make it worse if you go after him.”

“It’s not that easy, Zack,” Cloud argued. “I love him and I’m…afraid. What if, by telling you two, I somehow drive him to that point? Or that even if he stays sane, we break up? Before, I thought I had known emotional pain when fighting and defeating Sephiroth, but it’s nothing compared to now. I know him, I love him.”

“I know you do, Spike, but you have to let it be for now. I mean, you’ve been working hard for almost a whole year on this and you’ve gotten to the point that it’s out of your hands. There’s nothing more you can do at this point in time. When you told us, you gave up your total control over everything and now all you can do is wait. Which I’d say you deserve, give what you’ve put us through. You little brat, do you know how worried we were?”

Cloud opened his mouth to protest when Zack hugged him and they ended up in a small wrestling match. The sheer silliness of it cheered his mood at a little until they stopped, listening to the rain hitting the roof and panting as they caught their breath. His thoughts wouldn’t stop circling around Sephiroth though. Where had he gone? Had he…gone to the mansion?

“Would you stop fretting?” Zack muttered, seeing his anxious look come back.

“I can’t help it,” he snapped, smacking Zack with a pillow before he stood up and began pacing.

“It’s only been barely a half an hour. I’ve seen him gone for at least three in these moods.”

Despite Zack’s reassurances, Cloud didn’t stop wearing a trail through the flooring. It finally got onto his friend’s nerves and he threw up his hands. “Fine, we’ll go look for him. We’ll that make you happy? I don’t think it’ll make him so, but you’re killing me here.” With another muttered grumble, Zack got off the bed and grabbed his sword. Hunting around in his bags without permission, the black-haired man shoved First Tsuguri into his hands.

Cloud felt his tense shoulders slump a little in relief and he was right on Zack’s heels as they left the room and headed downstairs. However, Sephiroth wasn’t in the tavern area of the Inn. A cold knot of fear slunk into his stomach as listened to Zack ask anyone there if they’d seen the General. The only thing any of them could say was that he’d left about twenty minutes ago.

“Maybe he’s at the mansion,” he suggested.

They headed out into the pouring rain and jogged through the mud up to the decrepit building. The gate was still barely hanging onto its hinges and was slapping back and forth in the wind. With a kick, Zack had it off its hinges and landing on the muddy ground, stomping over it without a word. Not that either one of them could really hear anything through the storm had they tried to say anything anyway.

It was as eerily silent as always when they stepped in, dripping water and mud onto the ground. A layer of dust covered everything, just like in his memories. Zack looked to him expectantly and Cloud winced, taking the lead and cautiously heading upstairs. Monsters had infested the building the last time he’d been here, though so far there didn’t seem to be anything but cobwebs and a few spiders.

Nor were there any footprints left behind from Sephiroth. Nothing but themselves disturbed the dust. At the first landing of the stairs, he turned them to the right and to the main bedroom. It was burned into his mind where the trap door was in the stone wall and pushing in a block had it grinding and sliding back and away to show the broken stairs.

“Careful, they’re really old and I’ve had more than a few break under me before.”

“Guess you put on weight when you got older, huh?” Zack quipped and if Cloud hadn’t already started on descending the rickety stairs, he would have turned around and smacked his best friend a good one.

“Shut up.”

Cloud kept his hand on the stone wall all the way down, as there was no railing and he had no intention of falling the rest of the way. Just as before, the passageway down at the bottom was creepy and he could see the bats hanging off the ceiling now that he knew where to look. They eyed the two of them but didn’t seem inclined to leave their perch, especially since the sound of the rain traveled even all the way down there.

“I think we should wake up Vincent while we’re here.”

“Vincent? Who’s Vincent?”

“He’s a former Turk,” Cloud explained in a quiet whisper. “Hojo used him for some really nasty experiments, partly because he’d been in love with Lucretia. He’s blamed himself for what happened to her ever since.”

Zack grabbed his arm as he was about to start walking again. “Okay, wait a second here. Did Lucretia love him?”

“Well…I don’t know. Guess it would depend on who you asked. Maybe, why?”

“Well…if she loved him and he loved her and Hojo didn’t like him…what if he’s Sephiroth’s dad? Is that possible?”

“Anything is possible,” he answered slowly. He’d once asked Vincent something similar in the past and had never gotten a straight answer…if getting a straight answer out of Vincent was possible at all. “I see…similarities between the two of them, some of them physical and others…” He thought back to Vincent and Cid’s relationship. They’d never said anything and nothing was ever really seen, but the two had been joined at the hip ever since they had successfully saved the Planet. And he’d always gotten a strange feeling about Vincent whenever he thought of the idea that maybe, just maybe, they might have had more than a friend relationship.

“What others?”

“Zack, do we have to talk about this now? We’re trying to find Sephiroth!”

“I have to know, what others?” There was a stubborn glint in his friend’s eye and a smile lurked around his lips.

“I’ll only say this, think what you want about it: I can’t imagine Sephiroth ever being…on the bottom between us, okay?”

“Now wait one second here, are you saying that they share that? Men and positioning? Didn’t you just say that he loved Lucretia?”

“Zack!” he snapped quickly, kicking his friend’s ankle hard and watching the man jump about in pain. “Shut up about it, okay?!” With the threat of more violence, Zack let it go, but he could see an amused grin on the man’s face.

They quietly headed down the long passageway, Cloud pausing them at the first, halfway hidden door. Zack glanced at the other not a few paces away, but remained next to him. “This where that Vincent guy is?”

“Yes. Help me open this door, I don’t have the key.”

Zack dragged his sword from over his shoulder and jabbed it hard at the lock with such force that it split some of the wood. Another powerful kick and it swung open with a shattering of the old, rusty metal. Grinning in triumph, Zack strapped his buster sword onto his back again and motioned for Cloud to go first, as one would with a date after he’d opened the door.

Idly glaring at Zack for his teasing taunt, Cloud hesitantly stepped into the room. The coffin was still closed, but he knew that Vincent couldn’t have missed the noise as Zack broke the door. Trying to be polite, he knocked on the lid. No answer was forthcoming so he awkwardly pried it open and peered in.

Red eyes were already open and giving him that disapproving stare that he’d learned so well. “Hi, Vincent.”

“Is your name Cloud?”

He blinked in surprise, glancing over at Zack. His friend shrugged. “Guess this isn’t normal either from what you remember.”

“Hardly,” he shot back. “I didn’t even meet him for months after we had escaped from the basement.” Turning back to Vincent, he shoved the lid off the coffin entirely. “How do you know me?”

“I had a dream that a young man named Cloud was going interrupt my sleep.” There was a pregnant, disapproving pause. “Looks like it was right.”

“What else did the dream tell you?” Vincent was as close to psychic than Cloud had ever seen, his sixth senses bordering on supernatural in that aspect and the last time he had woken the man up, he had stated that his dreams had already informed him of what was going on, to some extent.

“Nothing. My dreams tell me nothing, it is merely my interpretation of them. Now go away and leave me undisturbed.”

As Vincent reached out to drag the coffin lid back over top him, Cloud hurried to stop him, almost falling over top of the former Turk and giving Zack a good look at his metal arm. “Vincent, please don’t do that. We need your help.”

“What for?”

He glanced at Zack for help, but his friend merely shrugged at him. He wasn’t sure what to say to get Vincent to leave his coffin. The last time he had woken him up, it had been a combination of what Sephiroth had done and something about Hojo, neither of which he could rely on. “We’re looking for someone who might be your son.”

“I have no son.”

“So you’re sure you’re not Sephiroth’s dad then?” Zack asked, leaning in the doorway.

The name seemed to spark something in Vincent, a flash over red eyes. “I knew of a baby that was to be born that was going to be named Sephiroth, but he died in childbirth, along with the mother.”

“That’s what Hojo told you before he experimented on you?” Cloud asked, seeing perhaps a spark of hope of getting Vincent out of the coffin. He just couldn’t leave the man there.

“…How did you know about that?”

“I’ll explain everything later, I promise, if you come with us. Right now, I can tell you that Sephiroth is very much alive.”

“Yeah, you’re talking to his boyfriend right there.”

“Zack!”

Vincent stared at the two of them for so long without saying a word or moving that Cloud felt his hopes steadily sinking. He was about to give up on the idea of ever getting Vincent to agree when the hand loosened on the coffin lid. “I will come with you, if only so you can explain how you know my history and who I am.”

Though Vincent insisted that he didn’t need it, Cloud and Zack helped him out of the coffin to stand. As like other things, Vincent was the spitting image of the man in his memories. Swallowing thickly, he led the two of them into the basement library. This too was burned into his mind as it used to be, except that it hadn’t been converted into an experimenting room yet. There were no tanks full of mako or any syringes with Jenova cells in them anywhere in the room.

“He doesn’t seem to be here,” Zack commented as they scoured the small library anyway, the SOLDIER occasionally pausing to look at the book titles or pick up something from the floor here or there. “If he’s not here then where would he be?”

“At the mako reactor,” Cloud whispered, filled with dread. This was his worst nightmare. He didn’t even bother to wonder how Sephiroth might have gotten there. The fact that he wasn’t in the ShinRa mansion meant that there was only one other place that he could be and that was the last place he wanted his lover.

Redemption, Ch15

2008-08-25T15:03:21Z

I know, it's been almost too months since I posted anything. But I was working on my new job, and just when things settled down, I got sick. :/ The last week has sucked for me, coughing up my lungs among other things. Thankfully I think it's mostly over now. I'll try to work on the next chapter soonish and get it up.

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 3,201
Chapter: Chapter 15/17
Status: Complete
Rating: R
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

Cloud couldn’t hear anything past the roaring in his ears. If at any point in his life that he’d felt that what he’d done was wrong, it was now. It was barely a week after his birthday celebration and he felt the floor dropped out from under him. He was actually surprised his heart was still beating, given the terror and horror that touched him.

“What…did you say?”

“I said,” Zack repeated with happy glee, completely unknowing what was shredding up Cloud’s insides, “that we’re going to Nibelheim! And you’re going with us! Come on, look more excited here. We went to bat for you on this mission because we know you’re from Nibelheim.”

“Th-thanks.”

Wait, wait, wait! This isn’t supposed to be happening! It’s supposed to be sixteenth! On my sixteenth birthday! I just turned fifteen last week! This is all wrong, it wasn’t supposed to happen yet! Why is everything rushing so fast?! Sure, Cloud had considered himself prepared, knew that things wouldn’t go exactly the same way as before, but it was one thing to think it and another thing to know it. The fact that they were going to Nibelheim in two weeks had thrown all his carefully constructed plans into chaos. Is this my punishment for trying to cheat fate? How can I possibly keep Sephiroth from going insane now? When I’m like this? I don’t have the strength to keep up with him, fight him and hope to keep him from losing his sanity!

“Hey, Spike…you sure you’re okay? You’re white as a sheet. Did you not want to go back?”

Cloud blinked, seeing Zack staring at him in concern. He forced a smile, but he was sure it was obvious that it was forced. He didn’t feel happy, he felt stark raving terror. He’d been flying by the seat of his pants for a while now, but he’d always had some sort of guideline from his memories. The exams for SOLDIER candidates were still held on the same date, Zack and Sephiroth’s missions were still usually the same and at the same time… But this was a whole year early, which meant everything could be different. What if Zangan wasn’t teaching Tifa yet? What if…he had to wake up Vincent early?

“Why…are we going? Is it about…a mako reactor?”

Zack looked at him in misgiving at his smile and sat down in the well-worn chair in the small lounge area of the SOLDIER dorms on the first floor. “Nah, nothing like that. Far as I know, the reactor is working perfectly.”

Another difference… “Then why?”

“Well you know those corporate heads don’t tell us anything, but theory has it that it’s Hojo pulling strings. He’s got some stuff in the mansion up there that he wants brought down here, research and all that apparently.”

Cloud forced himself to sit down casually next to his friend. “Then why send—”

“A whole regiment, led by Sephiroth himself? Worried about the locals, mostly. Apparently the ShinRa mansion isn’t well liked up there, the people don’t want it there, and there was rumors that they tried to burn it down once for some reason, but couldn’t because of a freak blizzard that hit just at the time they were going to set it on fire. Whatever is in there that they don’t like, assuming there actually is anything in there besides rotting floorboards, Hojo’s all worried about the townsfolk taking exception and trying to destroy them.”

“What about the Turks? Aren’t they better equipped to handle a job like that?”

The black-haired SOLDIER snorted and waved his hand dismissively. “Like Rufus ShinRa would allow his precious Turks to do anything for Hojo. I don’t care what the books say, they’re more loyal toward Rufus than they are to that President of theirs and it’s well known that Hojo and Rufus hate each other about as much as Seph hates Hojo.”

“That…”

“…seems impossible, huh? But I’m serious. I caught them in an argument once, a real bad one. Tseng was in background as usual and Hojo and Rufus were close to a screaming match. Apparently Hojo had tried to filch one of the Turks for experimentation and Rufus took exception to his people being used as guinea pigs.”

He looked at the tabletop thoughtfully, tracing the patterns on it made by the wood of the tree left behind. Well that was an unexpected thought. He hadn’t known Rufus cared that much about the Turks or had that much of a heart. “I wonder why.”

“Wonder why what?”

“Why it bothers Rufus that the Turks could fall into Hojo’s hands. I mean, he doesn’t seem to care if other SOLDIERs do, or even Sephiroth. So why just the Turks?”

Zack eyed him a bit before shrugging. “Why don’t you go ask him? I wouldn’t make the mistake thinking he’s a good guy, he’s just as ruthless as his daddy in his own way, but he doesn’t seem quite as heartless just yet. I could be wrong, though. Still, even if he is, I have hopes that if he can get around some decent people, he might not become like his old man. He’s still young, only a few years older than you, so it’s not all ingrained into his brain yet that he has to be an asshole.”

Cloud thought of Rufus in his wheelchair, looking distinctly humbled by his experiences and his speech about repaying the planet, and most importantly his actions in trying to do so. He didn’t think he’d ever really like Rufus ShinRa, though he couldn’t actually pinpoint a single incident that really made him hate the guy. It wasn’t him that had dropped the plate on the second seven slums. With so many things changing, it was hard to know what to expect, really. Rufus could turn out to be better, or so much worse, than the last time before he’d gone back and messed things up.

“Maybe…”

“Maybe what?”

He blinked, drawn out of his thoughts to find Zack staring at him again. “Nothing.”

Another of those inscrutable looks were sent his way. “We leave at the end of next week. Theoretically, it’s only supposed to last a day or two, but you never know with a ‘Hojo mission’. So keep your eyes open, okay? I have a feeling that something might go wrong.”

Cloud forced a laugh. “You suddenly psychic?”

It didn’t help his state of mind that Zack didn’t smile like he was hoping and instead shrugged. “Nah, but sometimes I get feelings about a mission from time to time and when they happen, they tend to be right. Kind of like a sixth sense. You’ll get it too eventually, Cloud. A SOLDIER just learns these things after so many missions.”

Too bad I already know something bad is going to happen, he thought with an inward slump.

-0-0-0-0-0-

The week went by incredibly fast just because Cloud didn’t want it to. He felt disjointed from everything in a way. Sephiroth and Zack were the same as always, routines were still observed, and the executives remained as aloof as they had been, but to Cloud, it was as if he was standing on the sidelines. His mind was constantly at work, trying to figure out where this was all leading. He had to know where it was going to figure out how to stop it.

Maybe it was the ripple effect. He had thrown a stone lightly into a pond and one ripple started, and that started another, and another after that. It was the only way he could explain the deviation from what he knew. Cloud had always just assumed that the burning of Nibelheim was a constant, and would happen when he was sixteen, no earlier or later. Why he had thought that, he didn’t know, as he no basis for it, but it had just felt that way. Not once in his memory did he recall hearing of a mission to Nibelheim prior to what had happened when he was sixteen. As far as he knew, it had been the one and only time that Sephiroth, as a man, had stepped foot in the little mountain town.

That was all about to change.

His heart filled with anxiety, Cloud got into the truck with two Second class SOLDIERs, Zack, Sephiroth, and two regular troopers. It was the same one that he’d been in when he was sixteen. Everything about that trip was burned into his memory so that he even recalled the small dent in the back door.

He said very little, despite Zack, and even Sephiroth occasionally, trying to get him to talk. Cloud hoped they assumed that the pale color of his face was motion sickness and not nerves, because he wasn’t interested in being grilled about what his problem was, either in the truck or at the town.

Cloud was desperately paying attention to every detail and he had a laundry list of things that compared what happened before to now. The timing of it was different; the truck was the same; the crew was different; he was different; there was no attack on them by a dragon; the route was identical; the weather a perfect copy. It was the first time since he’d been sent back that he really had no idea what was going on. It was like someone had just pulled the rug right out from under him.

It was nightfall when they arrived, which was also different. Because there had been no delay from the dragon, they had kept at least an hour, perhaps more, of their trip from happening. His stomach tying itself in knots, Cloud stepped out of the truck and peered around him through the heavy rain. If things continued as it should in his memories, by tomorrow morning the rain would stop and they would have clear skies.

Willpower alone kept him breathing. For so long he’d lived with the knowledge that Nibelheim was gone. Even after they’d returned, chasing Sephiroth and the reunion business with the town rebuilt, it hadn’t been the same. It had been artificially populated with people who were paid by ShinRa or really had no clue what had gone on. ShinRa’s version of wiping clean the blemishes of history and it had sent a terrible ache through his heart. His own home had been rebuilt down to a T, but his room hadn’t been his room and the person living there wasn’t…

But the place he was looking at was the real Nibelheim. People he’d grown up with and knew all his life lived here. Sure they were indoors now and likely sleeping through the rain, but he could see it. The lived-in feeling of the town was as clear as day, from the not-quite-perfect roof of Tifa’s best friend, to the crooked chimney of the Inn. It wasn’t like the clearly patented ‘ShinRa attempt’ with pristine walls and perfectly placed blocks and utter lifeless expressions.

“Gonna stand all night in the rain, Spike?”

Zack’s jibe from where he stood in the doorway to the Inn caught Cloud’s attention and he realized that he was the only one still outside. The truck had been parked out of the way of traffic and everyone had gone inside except himself. He’d been lost in his thoughts on the town that he could see clearly even in the dark, amid the heavy rain. Sephiroth moved to join Zack in the doorway, his cat green eyes watching him in contemplation.

Maybe it was Zack’s ‘sixth sense’ kicking in, but somehow he had a feeling that they were going to push the issue during this trip. His denials and excuses and diversions were running out. He had none left to tell them that they would believe and they would not accept just silence or an ‘I can’t tell you’. They were his friends and they would help even if he didn’t want them to.

Cloud hurried from where he stood into the Inn and Sephiroth handed him a towel he’d obviously been waiting with. Though his expression was as always when he was in public, there was a warmth to his gaze when their eyes met and it sent a shiver of feelings through him. No, there was no way he could bear to lose Sephiroth, not now.

“You’ve got the pick of the Inn, gentlemen,” stated the Innkeeper, whose name he had, amazingly enough, forgotten. Forgetting those little details made Cloud worried, because if he forgot them, what else was he liable to forget? “There’s a room for the General by himself, naturally, and one for three of you SOLDIERs, and for the rest, another room.”

“It isn’t necessary to have a room by myself.”

Sephiroth’s statement caught the aging Innkeeper by surprise and there was a flash of…fear in his eyes, which made no sense to Cloud. Was he scared that if he didn’t give the famous General his own room that ShinRa would somehow find out about it and descend on him? Somehow shut him down or kill him? Were the people in Nibelheim always this paranoid or was this something else that was changing?

“I will share a room with my Lieutenant, and if you have a room big enough, the rest of my troop will share a communal room. That only uses two and is more economical and costs less.”

Cloud used the towel to dry his hair and the action hid his proud smile…not to mention his amusement. Watching the stuffy older man flounder for words was actually funny, though some part of him was horrified at himself that he dared find anything amusing about this mission. This was a very serious affair, one that would end up deciding the fate of the person he loved. He shouldn’t want to laugh!

A few more exchanges and finally the deal was settled, as Sephiroth had asked for it. Despite being soaked and mud coating their boots, they headed upstairs. He could tell that the two ShinRa troopers were tired, though he himself was feeling still vaguely energetic, likely from the mako injections. In fact, all the SOLDIERs present and Sephiroth included, seemed to feel the same as himself in that regard. One of the SOLDIER 2nd’s seemed to actually be fidgeting with stored up energy from the drive that he’d been unable to let out.

“Strife, come here. You’re a native here, aren’t you?”

Cloud detoured from heading to their new ‘barracks’ and instead followed after Sephiroth and Zack as they went to their room. If he’d been younger, it would have seemed odd to him, but he knew that it was mostly a ruse. Sephiroth wouldn’t need his ‘knowledge’ of the town or the landscape to find the ShinRa mansion, but it would also scream favoritism if he was asked just because to join the General and Zack, especially since he was only a SOLDIER 3rd rank.

As soon as the door closed behind them, a gloved hand wove it’s way into Cloud’s spiky blond hair and lips were on his. Cloud kept it more on the chaste side, knowing that Zack was there and grinning like a loon at them, which Sephiroth didn’t seem to particularly mind, so long as he was allowed to explore the insides of Cloud’s mouth with his tongue. He seemed to have a particular fascination with such deep kisses, which usually invariably led to something more.

“Well, when you two are finished making out over there—No, Seph, that does not require a correction, it’s a figure of speech.”

“I was well aware of that,” was the calm answer and Sephiroth let him go and headed for the nearest, and only, chair. Zack didn’t seem to care that he was left with one of the beds for a seating arrangement and flopped down on it hard enough to make the bedsprings creak in protest.

Cloud sat down on the edge near the foot of the other bed, but his throat closed on any words he might have wanted to say. They were watching him expectantly, clearly wanting him to explain something, but he had no idea what to tell them. He knew what they wanted to hear, they wanted to hear the unfettered truth, but…

“You’re not leaving this room until you tell us, Spike.” Cloud glanced for support from Sephiroth and only saw a firm nod in agreement to Zack’s words.

“I…can’t tell you.” It was the lamest thing he’d ever said, but it was the first thing out of his mouth. There were no more excuses coming to mind. Everything was a blank slate, something he’d already tried before. “And I’m not sure what it is you’re wanting me to tell you in the first place.”

“Okay then, we’ll narrow it down. How about starting with why you’ve been as white as a sheet since I mentioned Nibelheim a week ago?”

A moment of clarity hit Cloud and he almost breathed a sigh of relief as an answer came to him. “I have…unpleasant memories of this place. I didn’t really want to see it again.” And that was the utter truth…just not in the way that it would seem.

“Uh huh,” Zack muttered skeptically. “And your inexplicable knowledge of monster characteristics that you don’t generally read in books?”

“I listened when the other SOLDIERs talked.”

“What about your attitude?”

“Attitude?”

“You act like a SOLDIER 1st does, Cloud. You’ve got the same confidence, the same air. You know tricks that you only get from experience. You’re not even the same Cloud that I knew when he first joined. It was like he went to sleep one night and you woke up instead. I’m not saying that I don’t like you or anything, but I really can’t think of you and he as the same person—”

“Zack—”

“Cloud.” Sephiroth’s voice cut through both of theirs and he winced, reluctantly looking at his lover. Or rather, the General. It wasn’t his lover that was staring out of those green eyes, but his commanding officer. There was just that subtle difference, that shift, but knowing both sides, it was as clear as day to Cloud. “We’ve been patient, exceptionally so. We’ve waited for you to come to us. However, this has gone on long enough. Ever since Zack mentioned Nibelheim, you’ve been distracted. You randomly lose focus in practice matches, you get so lost in thought you walk right past your dorm room, and just now, you stood in the rain for ten minutes and it took Zack almost shouting at you to get your attention back. I can’t have this in my squad. Clearly whatever is bothering you is detrimental to your well-being and ability to function. Tell us what’s going on.”

“I don’t want to,” he whispered, one last hope. Cloud didn’t know what telling Sephiroth or Zack what happened would do. It could prevent the tragedy or it could expedite it.

“We’re aware you don’t, but I’m afraid you’ve left neither of us a choice except to take this route. What happened to make you like this?”

“…You killed everyone.”

Sanctuary

2008-06-30T17:58:13Z

More Mal and Tuari, finally! The last story that's written. Eight is in the works, but it's not done yet being written.

07 - Sanctuary

After dealing with Tuari's obsessive ex-lover, things are settling down. Malachai and Tuari are enjoying an extended stay in the luxurious and relaxing realm lorded over by Daeinde, the Daedric Prince of Companionship. It's a chance for Tuari to get to know Atrios a little better...

*Male/male sex - adults only*

Redemption, Ch14

2008-06-28T03:18:25Z

Ah, your third chapter today :D Hope this makes up for the long lack of the month. The story seemed to write itself at the moment and not wanting to lose momentum, I kept typing so I didn't lose it.

Also the last two pages are NOT WORKSAFE. :)

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 5,080
Chapter: Chapter 14/17
Status: Complete
Rating: R
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

By the time Cloud trudged forward toward the building that held all the SOLDIER dorm rooms from 3rd to 1st, even the General’s rooms on the top most floor, he was exhausted. He glanced only briefly at the sign next to the doors that opened into the lobby for building. It was called ShinRa 2-2, though no one could figure out why. Maybe when it had been built, it was the second building of the second something. It didn’t mean much anymore, as there were now so many buildings and those who lived there affectionately called it ‘the shithouse’.

He wasn’t sure why exactly, but it probably had something to do with Zack being drunk and ‘christening’ the building with its new name.

It was as he was digging in the pockets of his new uniform, the closest facsimile he could get to what he wore when he was actually twenty-three and get away with in ShinRa, for his keycard that he realized someone was standing beside it. A small smile, one he couldn’t suppress, touched his lips upon seeing the imposing figure of the General waiting for him. He saluted only for the benefits of those that might happen to be passing by. “Yes, sir?”

“Follow me.”

Cloud did so quietly and it was only when Sephiroth felt they were in a place that was watched the least, a not-many chance of being interrupted by others, that their superior/soldier ranks disappeared. He’d tried, at first, to balance it out with their relationship and ranking, but it never worked. Whenever they were together, either by themselves or with Zack, he found himself forgetting the fact that Sephiroth was his superior. For whatever reason, it seemed to please his boyfriend.

Three kisses later and several wandering hands later, their version of ‘hello’s finished being exchanged, Sephiroth finally got around to why he had been waiting for Cloud in the first place. “How tired are you tonight, Cloud?”

Before his mind had even begun to process all the various meanings of that question, his heart started to pound. The most obvious one, to him, made him silently gulp. “Not that tired,” he lied. Sephiroth gave him The Look when he knew someone wasn’t being entirely truthful and he finally shrugged sheepishly. “Okay, I was exhausted when I came in, but I think you kissed it and made it all go away. I may not be full of energy, but I’m not exhausted anymore either.”

He saw the smile that only someone he or Zack would be able to find on Sephiroth’s face at his words. Though he tried not to be silly, knew he had no time for such things in the face of his ‘mission’, if it got Sephiroth to show a rare smile, he’d do it whenever he could. It had become so important to him lately that Sephiroth smile, really enjoy their time together like Cloud did.

“Are you willing to visit my room with me?”

His mind said that clinched what the earlier question was about and a blush touched his cheeks. As if unable to stop himself, Sephiroth leaned forward and left a kiss on his heated face, which only made it worse. He didn’t know if his boyfriend knew just how romantic he often was. He rather doubted it, as Sephiroth seemed to be moved more with curiosity than anything else, wanting to explore things he had never done before, rather than the notions of ‘romance’ from books.

“Yes,” Cloud answered, just a bit breathily.

Sephiroth seemed pleased at the answer and he felt like he was floating a little with nervousness all the way through the elevator ride to the top floor. His room was on the bottom floor, as far from Sephiroth as it could possibly be while still being in the same building. It wasn’t surprising, he supposed. All SOLDIER 3rd classes were on the bottom floor. Second went to the second and third floors; First, fourth and fifth floors and the sixth was reserved for Sephiroth and a few of the higher ranked Turks that were given more room to accommodate their change in rank. Rumor had it that Tseng’s room, while not as large as Sephiroth’s, was on that floor.

Rumor also had it, if you knew who to talk to, that Rufus ShinRa knew the inside of that apartment by heart.

No matter how many of the handful of times Cloud had been in his boyfriend’s apartment, it never ceased to amaze him. How large it was and how it seemed to embody Sephiroth’s very essence: methodical, clean, and full of precision. Very rarely was anything out of place, except for perhaps in the bedroom from those times that Sephiroth was too tired to make his bed after getting up or just dropping something nearby to put away at some later point.

The apartment was dark when he stepped in, though that didn’t mean much, generally speaking, with mako-enhanced sight. Still, his injections weren’t nearly as much as Zack’s or Sephiroth’s, or when he’d been experimented on, so what would likely have been so utterly clear to either one of them, was still somewhat shady to him.

“Sephiroth, why are the lights off—”

“SURPRISE!”

Cloud gave an undignified shriek of alarm at the sudden banishing of the dark with a light switch and within a blink, found himself clutching at Sephiroth’s larger mass next to him before he’d even thought about it, fingers digging themselves into the leather. His eyes were as wide as saucers, skin white as a sheet, and Sephiroth peered down at him worriedly, asking, “Are you all right, Cloud?”

Zack, on the other hand, was laughing so hard, he was clutching his side and one good kick by an irritated blond had him rolling on the ground and crying, he was laughing so hard. “S-S-S-Spike… you s-s-scream like a g-girl! S-so funny!”

He kicked at his friend repeatedly, not hard enough to hurt, but just something of a reaction to let out his frustration at being laughed at, but Zack’s cackling didn’t leave him room to breathe, much less bat away his futile attempts at silencing the hateful sound. It didn’t help that his moment of fright had gotten Sephiroth concerned over him, when he wanted to impress his boyfriend.

“What the hell was that all about anyway?!” he demanded, when Zack started wheezing instead of laughing, trying to calm down and stand up.

“H-Happy B-B-Birthday, Spike!”

“Stop laughing, you ass!”

“T-Trying, but you’re so hilarious!”

It reminded him that it was his birthday, at any rate. He’d forgotten. After a certain point, he’d not wanted to remember how old he was, because that brought memories he hadn’t wanted to the forefront. And ever since he’d been sent back, he’d had little time to dwell on such things. Glancing at his reflection in the glass wall of Sephiroth’s apartment, he still couldn’t recognize himself. His blue eyes now had a little bit of green tainting their edges. Not a lot, but enough that it was there. There were dark circles under his eyes, but he was at least seeing a little of the definition of his face and hints of what it would be like when he became an adult.

“Hey, you with us, kiddo?”

Cloud blinked and glanced at Zack, seeing the concern behind the ever-present smile. “Yeah. You know, you really didn’t have to scare me like that. Unless you trying to kill me is your birthday gift.”

“But it’s so fun to scare you! Man, do I wish I had a picture of you, even on video, when you screamed and clutched at your lover like that. It was adorable, Spiky!”

“If I can pick my birthday present, can it be so that you aren’t allowed to talk to anyone for a whole year until my next birthday? Because that would be the best gift of all,” he shot back, but he wasn’t really angry. Zack was just Zack and despite looking very undignified in front of his boyfriend, he didn’t mind it. It was…fun, even if the jokes were mostly at his expense.

“Nope, you get no say in the presents. Now sit that pert little butt down in a chair, Seph’s chair even, and we can get started!”

Cloud glanced at Sephiroth, still not quite having had the courage to start calling his boyfriend ‘Seph’ like Zack. He’d finally gotten past the ingrained ‘sir’ part. Sephiroth met his eyes and shrugged, gesturing to the chair he habitually sat in. As far as he knew, no one had ever sat there besides the man himself, though Zack had confided in him that he’d been dying to know what was so special about it.

Cautiously he sat down and with his heightened senses, was almost instantly overwhelmed by the presence that surrounded him. Sephiroth had apparently used this chair for years, enough so that his scent permeated the fabric, shape perfectly molded to his every contour. It had him blushing red in seconds because it almost felt as if he were sitting in Sephiroth’s lap, arms holding him tightly from behind. It did little to help dispel that impression, as the chair was one of those high, wingback chairs and taller than him when he sat down

Zack was grinning like a loon, as if he had expected that reaction out of Cloud and he couldn’t help leveling a kick nearby that was easily dodged. Sephiroth, who had set out some drinks, disappeared into his bedroom only to come back a moment later dressed not in his habitual leathers but barefoot with a long-sleeved, white button up shirt on and some comfortable, black cotton pants. So used to it was Cloud that he didn’t even glance at the tattooed ‘1’ on the back of his lover’s hand.

“So, Spike, what’s it feel like?” Seeing his confused expression, Zack rolled his eyes. “Planet to Cloud, Plane to Cloud! Please come out of ‘Seph-lovey-dovey-world and enlighten us as to what the ‘holier-than-thou-that-none-but-Seph’s-ass-may-grace’ chair feels like!”

Cloud both blushed and tried to whap Zack for his cheekiness, even as Sephiroth’s expression didn’t change much, except for a faint crinkling of mirth at the edges of his eyes. “It…feels like Sephiroth,” he answered. It was the only thing that came to mind to describe it.

Even as Zack teased him about it, Cloud studied the room. Not much was changed except it had a bit more…color to it. There was a banner hanging over part of the glass wall, hung from hooks in the ceiling that said ‘Happy Birthday!’ in bold letters with a cake beneath it, candles all lit up. A table had been dragged between the two chairs facing each other and the sofa pulled closer to that so it all sort of clustered around the glass wall. With a well-placed, small Fire 1 spell Zack lit the fifteen candles on the cake that sat, in all its completely over-decorated glory. A few colorfully wrapped boxes sat nearby.

Though the black-haired SOLDIER tried his hardest, no amount of wheedling would get Sephiroth to even hum, much less sing, ‘Happy Birthday’ to him. He was somewhat grateful, as he thought his nerves might go into overload with Sephiroth singing at him with some silly but cute ‘happy birthday’ song. Not that that inhibited Zack much; he was singing with such gusto, Cloud wondered if any of the other inhabitants of the floor would come banging on the door to shut him up. It was getting quite late and some people wanted to sleep.

“Okay, Spiky! Make a wish and blow out them thar candles!”

Cloud laughed at the silly accent Zack used. He couldn’t honestly think of a wish, though. He’d basically gotten what he wanted right? A second chance for Sephiroth, for Zack, for Aeris, for everyone. Even for himself. He’d gotten that and it didn’t quite feel right, asking for more. Still, it was his birthday and birthday wishes were just words. They never really came true, far as he could tell.

All right then. I wish…that Sephiroth stays as he is now and doesn’t go insane, that Zack doesn’t die at Nibelheim, and that we can all be happy. In other words…that everything turns out like I hope it will.

Part of him half-feared that Zack would play a joke on him with those candles that could never been blown out, but he hadn’t. For all that Zack used him as a butt for his jokes, constantly teasing him even now, he still apparently wanted to this to be special to Cloud and it made a feeling of warmth grow in him. How he’d missed Zack so much before. Now he treasured every precious moment with both these men.

“So what did you wish for?”

He looked up at Zack’s curious question. Remembering that if you told your wish you’d never get it, and just in case it was true, Cloud answered with a grin, “For you to lose your voice for a year.”

“Hey!”

Getting in a good laugh at the mock-outraged expression, Cloud said, “Not really. I’ve already got my wish, so there’s nothing to ask for that I don’t already have.”

Zack blinked in surprise before gentleness tinged the edge of the teasing grin on his lips. “Aww, Spike! You’re gonna make me go all mushy! C’mere you!”

“Gah!” Cloud tried to struggle out of the sudden snuggling he found himself in. “Who said it had anything to do you, you teasing jerk!”

“Because you’re too kind a person to not have something to do with your friends, he figures,” Sephiroth said, sitting in the other chair and sipping at his drink. Though he wasn’t sure what was in it, probably water or the like. As far as he knew, Sephiroth didn’t drink alcohol. And he wasn’t of age either.

With a parting ruffle of his spiky hair, Zack picked up the first of three presents on the table and handed it to him. “This here is from me.”

Cloud wasn’t surprised to find that the most flamboyant wrapping paper was used and on top of that, Zack had drawn a multitude of smilie faces on it. It made him snort a little in amusement and he took his time unwrapping it. Gifts were so rare to him that he never just tore straight into them like he was sure Zack did. And yet at least Zack wasn’t fidgeting in his seat in impatience. In fact, he seemed to enjoy watching Cloud unwrap the present as much as Cloud finding out what it was.

He hadn’t ever let on that he knew that Zack knitted, as he figured if Zack had wanted him to know, he’d tell him. As far as he knew, the only person that had been aware of such a gift that the black-haired man possessed was Sephiroth so he was surprised to find that inside the box in his lap was a hand-knitted, pale blue sweater. On the front hovering over the right most corner of his shoulder was a little chocobo head. Suspicious now, he flipped it over only to find it a mimicry of Sephiroth’s: there was himself on the back, chibi and next to him…

“You just can’t help yourself, can you?” he muttered with a rueful grin as Zack howled in laughter, for on the back of the sweater next to his chibi self was a baby chicobo chewing on his hair and his chibi self was sitting on the ground looking highly disgruntled.

“Did you…knit this?”

His careful question was returned with a smile and a nudge of his knee with Zack’s bare foot. “Yeah. Seph told me that he told you I knitted and since I figured you knew already… Been workin’ on it for a month or two in my spare time. Wasn’t planning on really giving it to you until Seph spilled the beans that you were told. So now you two are the only ones in the world besides my mother that knows I knit. This is a state secret, more important than even President ShinRa’s honeybee underwear collection!”

Cloud laughed hard, remembering his own experiences in the ‘group room’ of the Honeybee Inn and getting a pair of underwear for all his effort just to rescue Tifa. “Thanks, Zack. Really.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Cloud grinned as he caught the slightly red color of Zack’s ears, a sure sign of embarrassment, as the man reached over to hand him the second box before taking up his customary seat on the sofa.

“That’s from Seph, but he can tell you the story himself.”

It was a small box, about the size of his palm with single-colored wrapping paper. He unwrapped that just as carefully. A black box sat in its place and he carefully opened that, eyes widening at what he saw before looking up at his boyfriend, eyes clearly questioning.

For one of the earrings was an almost perfect replica of the wolf stud earring he had worn before he’d been sent back. The other was a small, dangling buster-shaped sword, rather tiny and a short chain so it didn’t get in the way. They were obviously a set, as the wolf’s eyes were the tiniest sets of rubies and on the hilt of the sword was a small ruby as well.

“Zack showed me a detailed drawing he found in your room a few months ago when he helped you move to your new dorm and said that he saw several like it. You obviously liked it very much. And given your favored weapon…” When he trailed off, Zack nudged him to continue. With a slightly annoyed glance at his unrepentant friend, he added, “I owe Tseng a favor for it, but he was the only one that knew someone that could get the pair made in time for your birthday, with the quality that I demanded. If you don’t like them, they can always be exchanged.”

“No! No, not at all!” Cloud interrupted, holding the box tightly. “I love them, truly.” He had always had a soft spot for that wolf design and he had missed it. Whenever he was bored, he had found himself sketching the design of it onto any piece of paper within reach.

“Go on, Seph, put them in!”

Sephiroth set his glass down and stood up, walking the short way over to the chair. “Would you like me to?”

“Y-Yes, please.”

The silver-haired man knelt before him, picking up the sword and ever so gently threading it into the hole in his ear. Getting his ears pierced had been a ‘graduation present’ from Zack when he’d first joined SOLDIER and enough months had passed that he could take out the standard studs that he’d had to wear to make sure they didn’t close up again.

Those fingers were cool but firm as the pushed the back in to hold it in place and the sword felt like a ton of lead on his heated ears, cheeks also flushed red with a blush. Zack was snickering quietly, but nothing penetrated when his eyes met Sephiroth’s. Watching those long, slender hands pick up the wolf, another hand tilted his face to the right so that Sephiroth could see his left ear better in the light. Cloud could feel the calluses on his boyfriend’s hands from the sword work despite the fact that he wore gloves and it made him shudder a little.

“Are you all right?”

Cloud opened eyes that had instinctively closed, meeting Sephiroth’s gaze as fingers still idly traced the wolf that now rested in his left ear. “Couldn’t be better,” he answered just before he was tugged forward. Firm, chiseled lips brushed over his and he opened his mouth in an invitation that was immediately accepted by a long, slender tongue. Strands of silver hair fell over his shoulders as Sephiroth tilted his face up a bit more, looming over him even though he was bracing himself on his knees. Sure, Cloud knew that he would get taller as he got older, but for now he was still so…tiny in comparison to Sephiroth.

The kiss ended naturally, much to his surprise. Zack had given them ‘privacy’, of a sort, staring off into a direction that wasn’t at them and letting them have their moment. Though his friend didn’t see it, Cloud sent him a grateful smile anyway and relished the hands still holding his face before they let go and his boyfriend was moving across the room and back into his chair again.

Zack continued on as if the intimate moment hadn’t happened in his presence, not wanting to intrude on something that he had no business being in really. “Ah, and the last present! This is from the both of us.”

This wasn’t like the not-quite-useful but wonderful presents of before, such as Zack’s hand-knitted sweater or the earrings. This was a cellphone. Zack leaned forward and explained some of the buttons on this newer model that he wasn’t familiar with.

“This is so you can get in touch with us no matter where we are. The first number for quick dial is Sephiroth’s phone. The second one is mine. And don’t worry about not being able to afford it on your salary, it’s linked to both our accounts so we can take care of it.” Seeing his expression, Zack shook his head. “This isn’t because we’re babying you, Cloud. We just want to make absolutely sure that if you’re in a bind that you can’t get yourself out of, you can get to help no matter what. We’ve always got our phones nearby. And as soon as you get higher in rank and more pay, we’ll transfer it over to your account so you can pay it. Right now, you can’t afford this and don’t try to pretend you can.”

Cloud had been afraid of this. Not the phone, but the reason behind it. They didn’t know what he knew since he wouldn’t confide in them, but they were determined to help in any way they could. He could see the many reasons for such a thing as a cellphone and though it made him happy, it also made him more determined than ever to get past his sixteenth year without the burning of Nibelheim. He couldn’t allow himself to entertain the thought that it could happen at any other time. Nibelheim. Sixteen years old. Fire. Insanity. Death. It all happened at the same time and if he could just get past that…

“Thanks,” he said with a grin, tucking it away in his shirt.

Zack watched him seriously for a moment, as if he’d read every thought that had gone over his calm face before smiling. He knew his friend was disappointed even if he couldn’t see it, but that Zack was willing to let it go made him love his friend even more.

The ‘party’, as it were, lasted only an hour or two longer before Zack excused himself with a sizable amount of cake and headed back to his room, leaving him alone with Sephiroth. He didn’t know if Sephiroth had planned another ‘present’ for him or not.

“Would you like to stay?”

Cloud swallowed and nodded. “I’ll just take a quick shower, I’m all dirty from the Slums.”

Sephiroth had barely time to nod before he’d beat a hasty retreat into the bathroom. His heart was pounding hard against his ribs and he could feel his face heating up. He wasn’t sure now, if he ever was, what Sephiroth had planned for that night. Still, he was covered in grime and was grateful enough to wash it off his skin and beat the dust off his clothes. He took his time, hoping to calm his nerves, but they never settled down.

His boyfriend was sitting in bed reading when he hesitantly appeared in the doorway. No matter how many times this had happened, albeit not a lot, he still couldn’t quite enter the bedroom with any degree of confidence. As he always did, Sephiroth lifted his head and smiled slightly.

“I kind of borrowed your shirt.”

“I can see that,” Sephiroth answered, eying Cloud wearing a shirt much a clone of the one that the silver-haired man currently wore except it was dark blue. “I don’t mind, before you ask.” He paused, seeing the slightly nervous edge to his movements as he stood there. “If you’re not comfortable, I wouldn’t hold you to stay…”

“It’s fine,” Cloud answered, though in truth, his heart was fluttering so fast he feared he might have a stroke. Setting down his clothing in a neat pile on a chair near the door, he turned and headed for the bed.

Sephiroth pulled him close as soon as he was in reach, a gradual but strong motion, always leading but never overbearing. Lips were on his again within moments, but this wasn’t the kiss of a few hours ago. This was motivated not only by feelings but also by a physical passion. A passion he found himself responding to, straddling wider hips and feeling muscular thighs beneath him as he sat down.

The position didn’t last long before Sephiroth had rolled them over until Cloud was lying on the bed beneath him. It appeared to be the silver-haired man’s favorite position and it wasn’t long before those enticing hands had wandered under the shirt he wore and was stroking his burgeoning desire.

“I find you arousing wearing just that shirt,” Sephiroth whispered hotly in his ear and Cloud shuddered. Hands tugged his boyfriend out of those black, cotton pants and a low moan was the only sound of the pleasure that he induced.

Sephiroth was always quiet when they pleasured each other, elegant even in this, though Cloud always enjoyed seeing the expressions going over his boyfriend’s face. Sephiroth didn’t hide them from him, letting Cloud see what he was feeling. It was a point of trust that made the butterflies in his stomach go wild with happiness.

His hips were lifted a little, erections pressed together and the rocking of their hips created delicious friction that made Cloud gasp and cry out a little. He never got used to this no matter how many times they did it. However, it was also the first time in such a casual, no-rush moment. Neither of them had anywhere to be. There was no work waiting for Sephiroth to finis before the end of the day; there was no class or evaluation or minor mission that Cloud had to go on. It was just the two of them, relaxing and able to take their time.

It was the most that they’d been undressed with each other. Much like the reason they were always hurried, clothes were often never had a chance to be taken off. Cloud took the opportunity and tentatively unbuttoned that white shirt, Sephiroth shrugging it off in a motion that he barely seemed to notice, attention mostly on kissing Cloud’s neck. His eyes took in every rippling muscle before him.

Sephiroth’s leather armor gave hints as to what he looked like beneath it, strong hints, but still… Seeing the man with his whole torso bare was a something he’d never expected and it was beautiful. Skin wasn’t pale but wasn’t bronzed either; fingers found and traced scars left behind from battle, things that didn’t heal quite properly despite accelerated healing and cure Materia. His arms slid around to feel that moving spine as their hips thrust together into Sephiroth’s hand. Power was coiled in every muscle of Sephiroth’s body, the very definition of ‘masculinity’, for despite his long, silky hair, this man could in no way be called feminine or anything related to it.

Though his memories of the time before, when Sephiroth had gone insane, were still very much there, other memories amid that of gentle kisses, hugs, touching, and talking pressed them back. They gave him hope for this new future to be better than the last. Even, perhaps, give Rufus a chance and see what he might do with ShinRa before it was defunct. After what happened with Kadaj, Cloud had had little choice to acknowledge that Rufus’ intentions at least had been pointing toward the right thing, at any rate even if he didn’t agree with the methods. Of course, he could be wrong; it could be only that the near death experiences he’d had had changed him, but Cloud thought perhaps it was more than that.

Cloud hadn’t been paying attention to where Sephiroth’s other hand had gone until he felt a wet finger pressing against his ‘entrance’ that had always been an exit until now. He wasn’t stupid; he had done his research on how men had sex and apparently so had Sephiroth. It made his heart flutter a little in his chest, wondering if they really would make that final step forward in their relationship. Part of him felt that they needed to wait, that he wasn’t ready for it, but still another portion screamed out for that completion.

It felt awkward and strange, but Sephiroth was gentle, using kisses to distract him as he slid in a second and gently worked him wider. “Sephiroth…”

“Don’t worry, I used the lotion on the table.”

Ah, he hadn’t noticed that. Still…he clenched around those fingers as they started up a gradual, piston motion into him to match the thrusting of their hips, still creating that pleasing friction. Something sent a blinding surge of pleasure through him when those fingers found his prostate and he cried out as he climaxed, making the shirt he wore sticky. His own completion triggered Sephiroth’s and they panted against each other’s lips, taking soft and almost chaste kisses.

Fingers pulled out of him and a tissue was grabbed, the silver-haired man cleaning his chest before pulling off Cloud’s shirt and putting it in a hamper that he had never noticed, sitting in a darkened corner of the room. He blinked in surprise when Sephiroth came back only to pull the sheets over them both as he climbed into bed.

“Sephiroth?”

“Sleep, Cloud.”

“But…”

“Another time. There’s no rush.” Even as his eyes slipped closed, his exhaustion catching the better of him, he heard whispered into his ear, “And I don’t think you’re ready for it just yet.”

Redemption, Ch13

2008-06-27T19:52:12Z

I actually intended this chapter to be the birthday celebration, but it turned into something else entirely. I wanted a serious moment between Zack and Sephiroth, to show it all wasn't just fun and games, and I think it turned out exceptionally well :D

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 2,581
Chapter: Chapter 13/17
Status: Complete
Rating: R
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

“Cloud’s birthday is tomorrow, you know.”

Sephiroth lifted his attention from the never-ending stack of papers he had to sign. In a few hours his wrist would start to cramp and a few hours after that, his back would ache. By the time midnight came around, he’d probably end up getting antsy to walk around and the paperwork would never get done. Then again, it never did, there was always more to do. However, that wasn’t now. It was only two in the afternoon and his lieutenant had taken to lounging on the sofa set against the wall. He’d not wanted it really, as that encouraged people to stay, but Zack had insisted.

“And?” Already he was getting a bad feeling about this…

“And it’s customary to throw a party—”

Oh no. He had to head this train off at the pass before it got momentum. “No.”

Zack gave him puppy eyes. “But why not? He’s your boyfriend and all, even! People do that for the person they’re dating!”

“I doubt Cloud would appreciate being shoved into a room with many people that don’t even know his name any more than I would.”

Even as he turned his attention back to his paperwork, he could tell by the way Zack was breathing, that he wasn’t going to get out of this so easily. Already he knew a headache would likely be forthcoming, but there was little to stop his lieutenant when he got something into his teeth.

“But it wouldn’t have to be a party like that! You can have a small party.”

“How small?”

“Tiiiny! Itty bitty even!”

“How small?” he repeated, eyes suspicious at his friend.

Zack grinned, as if he’d just won the argument. “Three people. You, me, and birthday boy!”

He was already starting to wonder what the catch was. Zack didn’t do things by half. If he wanted to do something, he often went all out for it, so him suggesting a three-person, intimate party was ringing alarm bells in his head. And yet, try as he might, he could not find a single ‘wrong note’ about the suggestion. Nothing untoward leapt to mind, no little trick Zack was trying to play that would embarrass the two of them. He did care for his friend and trust him, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t very aware of his behavior.

“What does Cloud say?”

“Well, ya see…” Oh no… “I was thinking it’d be a surprise party. You know, where the birthday person doesn’t know that we’re planning it.”

Sephiroth’s eyebrows hiked to his hairline. “You want to throw a party for someone without knowing if they’d even appreciate it?”

“Come on, it’s his fifteenth birthday! His first one in Midgar, even! And he’s passed the exam, making it into SOLDIER all by himself, with not even one single hint from us!”

That was true, he thought, leaning back in his chair and tapping his pen idly against the paper on his desk that he was currently supposed to be perusing. Cloud had been determined to make it on his own. Not once had he ever asked for their advice, council, or even for special training. In fact, the only spar Cloud had allowed was that one with Sephiroth. Any attempt for a rematch, mostly suggested by Zack, had been declined. Nor would he allow Zack to help him study his books or material. Everything he was focused towards, he wanted to do by his skill alone, without any outside interference.

He couldn’t help admiring it.

“It won’t hurt anything! Spike will be gone most of tomorrow for a trip down to the Slums and we can set it up in your apartment long before he gets back. Then when he does, you can go down and ask him up, you being his boyfriend and all—”

“Only because he’d suspect something if you asked him.”

“—while I set up the ‘surprise’ portion!”

Zack was so excited over his idea, he’d gotten up off the sofa and was crowding Sephiroth at his desk, leaning over it until their faces were inches apart. His pen continued to tap on the desk, eying his lieutenant and friend with a jaundiced eye. “Why my apartment?” he asked at last.

“Because yours is the biggest and the only place that no one will interrupt, even for curfew. You know that Cloud is sharing a room now with another SOLDIER 1st and it’s barely bigger than a shoebox. My apartment is way too messy and cluttered and likely the guys on my floor would hear and want to join in. Yours is the best place for it!”

Sephiroth was weakening in his resolve and Zack smelled it, like a predator on its prey. “Come on, Seph. It’ll make him happy and you know it. I don’t think this place feels like a home to him yet and we’ve finally gotten him to relax around us. And maybe he’ll be relaxed enough that we can get what’s bothering him out of him.”

“No alcohol,” he warned emphatically. “You will not get him drunk to pry him open like that.”

For once, Zack looked affronted, as if what he’d said truly hit him and made him irritated. “Of course not, Seph! He’s like my little baby brother! I want him to tell us willingly and without resorting to trickery like that! Do you really think I’d get him drunk for that?!”

He relented at the slightly angry expression on Zack’s face and admitted, “No, I don’t.” After a minute, he sighed and closed his eyes, rubbing the bridge of his nose and trying to think it through. He didn’t want to upset Cloud. Some instinct told him that Cloud had had enough of that in his life and he didn’t want to add more to whatever burden the young man was carrying on his shoulders. It was another reason why, as much as he wanted and needed to, he was holding off taking their relationship to the next level.

Sephiroth was very aware that their bodies wanted more than what they were getting, and their emotions wanted a deeper connection, but he was putting off having sex for as long as they could both hold out. He cared, perhaps too much, to push it right then. Cloud was irresistible, not just because of his ‘young-boy’ cuteness, but the maturity he saw there drew him like a moth to the flame.

There was no denying, at least to himself, that without that maturity, he didn’t think he would have felt anything, at least on an emotional level. Sure, he was and likely would be physically attracted to Cloud no matter what, but it would not have engaged his emotions, were he one of those childish recruits that idolized him from a distance and stammered whenever he got close, as if they didn’t have a brain in their heads. When he looked into those amazingly deep sapphire eyes, he saw equality there. There was the youth, but also an amazing wisdom and calmness. It was as if he was an adult in mind, if not in body. Age had trouble coming into play between the two of them.

The more he saw, the more he wanted, with a passion. He wanted to know what was beneath the mask. Cloud was a delicious set of contradictions and an amazing well of emotions that Sephiroth couldn’t help desiring to see all the days of his life. He never knew what to expect out of the young man and was often constantly surprised by his changing, never-still mind. He was like a drug to Sephiroth, dragging him further into a madness of a sort. Not the madness of a drug or crazy, as he was both wonderfully clear-headed and yet brimming with emotion when he was around Cloud, but something that couldn’t be defined. Was this what love was like?

“Hey.”

Sephiroth opened his eyes at the prompting, to find that Zack was sitting at his side on the edge of the desk and staring at him with serious violet eyes. That was rare and he wondered if the lapse into his thoughts had been that long of a pause to cause concern. “Yes?”

“In all seriousness, Seph. Do you love Cloud? To the point that the thought of him being gone in any way makes you a bit out of breath?”

“…Why the question?” he asked in curiosity. Zack was usually never this probing, for all the fact that he was constantly throwing them together and urging more. It was done more in a playful sense than really wanting to meddle.

Zack watched him for a minute, before he knelt, crouched down next to the silver-haired man’s chair and holding his gloved hand. A thumb ran over the mark ‘1’ that was tattooed there, though he couldn’t see it. “You know I support the two of you all the way—”

“Zack, the cameras—”

“Fuck the cameras, Seph!” The harsh voice was serious, staring up into cat-green eyes. “I need to know this, when it’s just you and me. It doesn’t matter if they find out because Cloud isn’t a shrinking violet. He can take care of himself in a physical sense and he’s got protection from SOLDIER now. They can’t do anything to hurt him in terms of kicking him out. I love you both, you know that. Not romantic, but love in its own way, okay? And I need to know.

“Seph, you’ve never really interacted with people on a social level other than me until recently and you’ve never dated anyone before either until Cloud. I want to help if you have questions or don’t understand something, but most of all, I want you to know what you’re feeling. The expression on your face just then…”

“What did it look like?” He had to ask. He had never seen Zack so serious before, or at least on very rare occasions. He might not look it, but the black-haired SOLDIER was extremely protective of his friends, to a frightening degree.

“I’ve…never seen the like of it on your face, ever. I’ve been with you since Wutai, and I know you. I support you two wholeheartedly, you know that. You’ll probably not find someone who wants you two to be happy together more than me. It was just…it floored me a bit when I saw that expression because I realized that…that whatever it is, you felt deeply.

“I’ve never seen your expression so soft in my life. Whether you know it or not, you’ve always got this ‘business’ kind of face, definitely military. As if you’re always thinking of tactics and what has to be done. Stiff, even. It usually makes your face look a bit harsh, like you were chiseled by someone out of marble but they didn’t smooth out the rough spots with a soft cloth. Right then, though… You looked so perfectly at peace and happy and the only thing that has changed in your life to cause that have been Cloud. You were so relaxed, and a real smile, not one of your tiny ones either, showed up. You were, in a word, beautiful.

“I’m just worried that you’ll feel a bit overwhelmed because you don’t talk about it and then…I don’t know, panic or draw away from Cloud without warning and hurt the both of you.”

Sephiroth stared at Zack in contemplation. He could see the anxiety in his friend’s eyes and knew that it was pure concern driving the man, not the desire to meddle. He’d never known Zack to pry if Sephiroth really didn’t want to talk about it. If he was very against sharing something, Zack never pressed forward anyway. He always backed off. That he was asking this now meant that he’d reached the limit of his worry and couldn’t hold back.

A surge of affection touched Sephiroth for Zack. There was no one like him anywhere else on the planet and Zack had been the first person that he’d ever gotten close to. His feelings were genuine and not because he was ‘the General’ and his superior. It was because they were friends and because of that, he would share his feelings, just to put aside the worry he saw there.

“You don’t need to worry, Zack. I’m well aware of my feelings and I can handle them. I don’t feel overwhelmed at all. To be honest, it was a very gradual change that prevented an ‘overwhelming’ feeling. I…love him now, but I didn’t before.”

“When you first met him, you mean?”

Sephiroth nodded. “At first, I thought it was a game he was playing. An odd one, to be sure, but a game nonetheless and I played along, wondering what the point was. I couldn’t help getting drawn in, though. The more I learned, the more I knew that I didn’t know anything about him. It’s the maturity that I see there that draws me to him. I don’t think I would have…fallen in love with him had he been the typical teenager. However…”

“You’re worried about him,” Zack supplied. “As worried as I am and have been ever since you two met.”

Reluctantly Sephiroth nodded. “Yes. He seems…a little better lately, but there are still things I would like to know. Like how he knew so much about Behemoths during that fight a few days ago. Most of that knowledge can be found in a text, I grant you, but not the ones ShinRa hands out. It can be gotten to, just not easily with a busy schedule like he has. He was also almost too detached in that fight, as if he’d done thousands like it.”

Zack’s expression was grim. “I want to help him, but we can’t do anything if he won’t tell us what it is. It’s like he’s got some sort of self-imposed mission. It’s still going to take a lot of time, if we try it the natural way. We’ve just got to gently weasel it out of him through patience.”

“Which, as I recall, has never been your strong suit.”

That smile came back in full force, the serious moment shattered. Sephiroth blinked when Zack surged to his feet to hug him and pat his head before dancing out of reach of any retaliation. With as much dignity as he could muster, Sephiroth fixed his mussed hair and glared at his lieutenant, but there was no real heat or anger to it. They were back on the easy ground, where their friendship lay. To an outside eye, with their little exchanges it might not seem as if they were really friends, but they were. Sephiroth could honestly say that he’d miss Zack very much if he were ever gone.

“So can we?”

Sephiroth blinked, having forgotten what they were talking about before. “Can we what?”

“Have the party for Cloud!”

He groaned a little, going back to his work as Zack nearly bounced around his office like a ping-pong ball. “If you are absolutely sure that he won’t dislike it or get angry, and if there is no alcohol in sight, then yes. You are free to ruin my apartment…within reason,” he added, pointing the back of his pen menacingly at his friend’s figure.

Zack’s joyful little crow of delight made him worry for the state of his home by the time tomorrow was done with.

Redemption, Ch12

2008-06-27T17:31:08Z

I am honestly so sorry it took so long to get this chapter out. And this time it wasn't because the story was being a bear about it. :( I had a temporary job to do (hey it got me money to upgrade my computer wheeee!) and it completely ransacked me. I was so exhausted every night, including weekends, that I couldn't write at all. In truth, this chapter only took me very few days to write, it was just this temp job. It had to be done in one month, of a job that usually takes three, so...

Really sorry :(

~*~

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 4,261
Chapter: Chapter 12/17
Status: Complete
Rating: R
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

Sephiroth, Zack knew, was used to the stares he got from others. Especially from Scarlet. The woman had never quite forgiven the General for turning her down. It hadn't helped, really, that he had done so right in front of the open doors to the canteen and about a cumulative amount of people ranging from grunts to cadets to trainees to First Class SOLDIERs had been there to witness it. As usual, his commander had said it point blank with all the bluntness of a train at high speed. Zack didn't think he'd ever forget the way Scarlet's face turned as red as her dress and likely it had only been survival instincts kicking in that she hadn't slapped him.

Nobody hit Sephiroth.

Her looks since then at his superior had always been both slightly lusty and full of loathing. Sephiroth hardly cared and his green eyes never glanced her way during the habitual meetings that the man was forced to go to. Very rarely did Zack go as well, hearing about what happened through the grapevine. For executives of ShinRa, there was little to do but gossip and secrets didn't last long, usually. Except when you were part of, or witnessed, something to do with the Turks; it was often more than your life was worth to gossip about them.

Today was unusual. President ShinRa was in one of his planet-almighty-grouchy moods where no one anything did was good enough. He even snapped at Sephiroth, the golden boy, which caused the powerful General to raise one eyebrow and the atmosphere chill a little in the room with distaste. You didn't control Sephiroth, and he, despite being a General and a SOLDIER, didn't take orders well. It was likely because of Hojo, because as a child, Sephiroth had been ordered to do everything and since he hated Hojo, he hated orders. Not to mention there was no real ‘fondness’ between him and President ShinRa.

Scarlet was eying Sephiroth instead of with hatred and lust, something close to contemplation and a sadistic sense of humor. Zack would have bet his ranking in SOLDIER on the fact that by now every executive in ShinRa knew about Cloud. They likely didn't know what the nature of the relationship was, but they did know that the General was getting close to someone other than Zack.

Not that there was much to worry about now, though that didn’t stop the two men from doing so anyway. As a SOLDIER, even 3rd class, Cloud had protection that being a grunt or candidate hadn’t given him. Not to mention the day right after he had qualified and been given ranking, he had started his mako injections and even the lowest SOLDIER 3rd could easily physically crush one of those lofty executives.

Despite Cloud being of those people that didn’t fair well with the injections, body reacting to push out the ‘poison’ more fiercely than others, he didn’t seem alarmed by it. In fact, much to Zack’s suspicion and worry, he seemed far too at ease with it, mentally ignoring the pain after his injections with the experience of veterans. And yet he knew that Cloud would not have gotten injected before; candidates and grunts weren’t allowed near the stuff. After all, why waste precious mako on grunts that were mostly fodder anyway, right?

At least that was the excuse given by the higher ups and scientists.

Still, six months into his new rank and Cloud was doing…mostly fine. Zack did worry about overworking; Sephiroth did it all the time, but he was built with stress in mind. And no matter what had happened to change Cloud, to Zack he would always be that small, somewhat-helpless cadet that was shy and needed a friend. By no means had he given up on finding out what had happened to change all that overnight. Which was why he was currently working hard on his plotting with Sephiroth.

~*~

Cloud glanced at Sephiroth and Zack out of the corner of his eye as they conferred nearby, away from the new SOLDIERs. Every ranking was taken out a few months after their advance to find harder monsters to fight. Even second and firsts had their own groups at different times to fight things on their new level. At least he assumed they were talking about the mission.

It hadn’t escaped his attention that Zack hadn’t given up his desire to know what it was that Cloud did and he was running out of ways to get around it. So far he’d managed to dodge the ‘bullet’ several times now for one reason or another, but it appeared as if his frustration was growing and he was trying to recruit the General into his plan as well. When those two worked together on something, completely agreeing on a goal, the whole planet trembled. They were a force to be reckoned with and Cloud worried over the power that would come to bear.

He didn’t fear violence or physical torture, but more the emotional pressure. He knew they were worried about him and just wanted to help, but he couldn’t tell them. Not when things were still so new and in a flux. It wasn’t even a year since he’d been sent back and he couldn’t risk it.

Not yet.

Their superiors headed back, Zack with his confident and cheerful swagger and Sephiroth with his military precision. Their eyes met briefly and Cloud fought hard to maintain his calm control and not smile a little. Things had been ‘going well’ between them, at least that was the best way to describe it. It had been a little frustrating to him lately, just a little, not that he’d tell his boyfriend that.

Frankly, being in a body that was just a few days shy of his fifteenth birthday meant that he had raging hormones that he hadn’t been plagued with for a long time. Twenty-three years old with a mako-tainted body that had been experimented on for five years before that and several near death experiences had caused him to ‘even out’. Even young men in their twenties were often subject to their sexual desires, but after all he’d gone through, he had never been controlled by his body’s needs.

This was entirely different. He’d forgotten how potent those feelings could be until now and back then, he’d not even had the ‘incentive’ toward it. Sephiroth was beautiful and their kissing didn’t take much to get him aroused. His body craved more than the touching, but Sephiroth seemed content to go at his own pace. Indeed, there was even the vaguest of hints that the older man wasn’t going to allow sex until he was sixteen. And while his mind was grateful so he could get used to this new relationship, it made his body ache with frustration.

“All right, you’re going to be split up in threes,” Zack announced, “for a total of three groups and be given a direction. As soon as—”

The sound of panting interrupted Zack and he grinned at the new SOLDIER 1st that came running up. “Sorry I’m late.” He bowed to the General, who was frowning at his tardiness. “Heidegger gave me the riot act for some of the equipment. Guess I was the only one he could catch for that.”

It eased some of the unhappiness on Sephiroth’s face, as everyone in ShinRa knew what a Heidegger rant was like. There was no escaping until he started wheezing when he was out of breath and gave you an opening to run. Heidegger didn’t run well, being extremely overweight, so once it got to that point, you were generally free.

“SOLDIERs, this is Phillips. He’ll be going with group three. Did you think that we’d leave you all alone out there?” Zack teased, seeing some of the anxious looks on a few boys faces relax. “We’re not going to let you all die, but don’t make the mistake of thinking we’ll just jump in when you’re about to get a paper cut. You start relying on our presence at all, we’re liable to let you get hurt just to teach you a lesson. Now, you know your assignments, get moving!”

Cloud figured he was the one most at ease of the three of them as they were set off in a northerly direction. It was probably because he knew Sephiroth intimately and was used to the overwhelming presence of the General. They didn’t know where he was, couldn’t see him at all, but just the fact that he would be the one watching their group didn’t seem to do the other boys’ nerves any good.

His hand lifted to grip the hilt of the sword at his back, ready for anything that might jump out at them. The mako injections were, as much as he hated them, a necessary evil for First Tsuguri to be held. Oh, naturally he didn’t have it now. That would be a bit much to explain how he’d gotten such a well-made sword in his hands at this ranking and little money and it would be rather useless anyway. Though with the mako injections, he could simply hold the sword for awhile, he still didn’t have the necessary strength to wield it for any length of time. Just a few swings tired him out to the point his arms started to shake.

The plus side was that focusing his energy and goal onto lifting First Tsuguri, probably one of the heaviest swords ever made with as many blades that actually made up the whole, meant that he didn’t even notice that he could use most other blades without a problem, despite their weight.

“Did you hear that?” one of the other boys whispered, hefting the long sword up that he had chosen to specialize in.

The other, a hand-to-hand combat specialization, winced at the mention of something out of the ordinary. They were both as tight as bowstrings, ready and waiting for something to spring out at them and try to gut them. Despite a residual feeling of nervousness, Cloud was as relaxed as anyone could be. Monsters didn’t frighten him, at least mentally. Still, he worried about the other two. Being tense like that ended up for even more injuries. Even as a SOLDIER, they weren’t immune to accidents. If something showed up and knocked down one of them, the chances a broken limb would result were heightened.

“Don’t worry,” he told them, trying to be comforting as best he could. He wasn’t used to this sort of thing at all. He’d only really become a leader out of necessity during the whole debacle with Sephiroth. It had never been something he’d wanted to do. “We’ve got the ability in our heads, we’ve just got to get that knowledge to our fingers, right?”

They looked at him with relief, probably at the reminder that they had passed their training and that according to that, they could do this. Cloud was honestly so far removed in his mind from such things that he found it a bit hard to relate. He’d fought Ultimate WEAPON, a being born of the planet itself, so not many random monsters out in the area around Midgar or elsewhere could really scare him.

Nothing could dent the hopeful seed in his mind, ever since he had made it into SOLDIER. He had failed before, abysmally even. This time he had made it! Sure he hadn’t been the top of the top, but that hadn’t been his goal. Even if he’d passed with middle-of-the-road scoring, the fact that he passed at all caused him untold happiness. Somehow what he’d been running towards all this time for almost the whole year seemed more realistic. Before, he’d been working at a fever pitch for every scrap he could get, just hoping to get over the first hurdle of getting into SOLDIER. There was no other greater turning point in his life and if he’d been sent back to before the trials, surely that was one of the things that had to be changed under any circumstance.

A rustle of the bushes to his left caught Cloud’s attention, but he didn’t blink nor shift his stance. ‘Never acknowledge that you’re being watched unless you can drive some tactical advantage.’ The theory was sound, though it was somewhat hard to put into practice, given human nature. He would have told the other boys with him, but he feared they would become so jumpy that they’d attack something that wasn’t a threat.

Cloud didn’t need to worry about it much longer, since the colossal roar that rent the air let everyone within thirty feet know what was happening. The rustle of the bushes turned into a stampede as four clawed feet ground it into the ground when the Behemoth came into view. It snarled at them, bearing glistening fangs that were dark with some substance that could have been blood or poison. He’d never known a Behemoth to poison, but if this one was sick or deranged…

Somehow he didn’t think this was what their superiors had in mind that they test their mettle against, but he also figured that there would be no rescue immediately. Like any commanding officer, he was sure Sephiroth was holding back to see what they would do and how they would do it. After all, this was an evaluation.

“What the hell is that?!” demanded his comrade with the long-sword, voice hitching higher an pitch or two in fright.

“Behemoth,” Cloud answered automatically. “They’re tough, but not unbeatable. Just watch out for its horn lift, that packs a whollop and you’ll feel it for two weeks after…if you survive it at all.”

He’d not thought to hide his knowledge, the thought that Sephiroth would hear him with information not generally public knowledge and could only be gained by experience not coming into play. There wasn’t time for such contemplation in the face of this creature that was looking at them like they were its next meal. He was, to the others, remarkably calm and indeed, he felt that same detached feeling he had in battle before with random creatures: step back, analyze what you know about it without feelings getting in the way, and determine the best course of action.

With another roar that shook the leaves on the trees, the Behemoth charged straight at them with a single-minded intensity. They scattered in separate directions as they were taught, Cloud getting in one good whack at its head as swerved left. Its tusks were longer than most, but also chipped, as if it had gotten into more than one fight with the adventuring type and had been the victor despite the scars and wounds received in battle.

That made this harder because it knew how a human fought, generally speaking. In its little monster brain, it had at least some understanding of what a small being like they were would do in a situation such as this. It wouldn’t have survived so many encounters without learning something.

It was the first time he’d fought like this in years. The other members of Avalanche could all detect his movements to varying degrees, knew what he would do, and act accordingly. Sure, some could tell more than others. Tifa could because she knew him very well; Vincent had always anticipated most of his moves just by being observant; Nanaki read him much like a book; Cid, even, had a decent grasp on him probably owing to more instinct than anything else. Barrett, for example had never grasped the fine art of it, but he did at least pick up a few things. And if they weren’t there, Cloud always fought alone.

To fight with two other people that didn’t know what his every move indicated before he did it, to not know that when he moved left, they moved right, was a unique experience and one he didn’t relish but had to get used to. In SOLDIER, you were never assigned with a permanent group, or at least rarely. ShinRa liked to shift things about so no one ever got too comfortable.

Very narrowly did the martial artist of their group avoid a horn lift, owing mostly to a clumsy trip-turned-flip. Finally catching the other swordsman eye, Cloud and he rushed forward at each side. The Behemoth knew they were coming, he could see the knowledge in that beady eye, but with such a huge bulk, there was no moving to avoid it.

It roared in pain, rearing up on its hind legs as they danced away, out of reach of immediate retaliation. The victory of any hit at all cheered his comrades, but Cloud wasn’t so easily reassured. Yes, they had damaged the Behemoth, but the sheer size, strength, and intelligence of the creature would make this a long battle.

He was right. Fifteen minutes later when they were sweaty from anxiety and exertion, the Behemoth was only barely nicked and bruised. They weren’t doing so well either. For all their agility being much higher than the monster’s, and that they were smaller and quicker, that was no guarantee against injury. The longer they fought, the smarter the creature seemed to become, anticipating their moves four out of ten times. Their hand-to-hand specialist was gored from a tusk from thigh down; the other boy with the long sword had a dislocated shoulder from a harsh encounter with a tree as he was tossed to the side like a rag doll. Cloud himself faired little better for all his knowledge. His body just wasn’t what he needed it to be, and he was sporting several bruises and all around pain, though nothing sharp like the other two. He’d at least managed to ward off most of the really debilitating injuries.

Seeking to cover his comrade with the gouged leg, he dove in front with a burst of flame from the level one Spell material he’d been given before they’d left the barracks. A Behemoth didn’t particularly have any weaknesses that he knew of, but anything that made it back off with a roar of pain like that was good in his book. Gripping the light buster sword tightly in his hands, he focused hard, trying to find any one of his limit breaks. Naturally he wouldn’t have his precious Omnislash, but even a simple Braver or Cross-Slash would be a big advantage.

Feeling the pressure swell inside him, knowing by instinct it was Braver, he leapt up into the air and brought down his sword in a chopping motion toward the Behemoth’s head. It probably wouldn’t do much to the monster in terms of taking a lot of damage, but it would at least make a dent.

Like he had expected, it didn’t cleave the Behemoth in two, he couldn’t be that lucky, but it did sport a long slice from the top of its head to its snout. Tasting its own blood like that seemed to drive it wild, into a rage that surprised Cloud. That he hadn’t been expecting. It also headed for their ‘weakest link’ and try as he might to drag himself away, their martial artist was never going to move fast enough. Cloud dived forward, placing himself in the path and braced his sword out horizontal to the ground in a guarding motion. He hoped he had enough bracing in his body to absorb most of the damage, though it would hurt like hell.

It never touched him.

The sound of leather hit his ears just before an even louder scream of pain from the Behemoth shattered the stillness of the air. Cloud blinked, having forgotten all about the fact that Sephiroth had been following behind them. The long blade of the Masamune was stained with the monster’s blood and it backed off briefly, its tiny brain coming out of its rage long enough to recognize a predator much more experienced and dangerous than itself. Instinct seemed to be kicking in and it was backing away, readying to run.

Sephiroth wasn’t about to give it that chance.

It was beautiful to watch the General fight. His movements were like a dance with a rhythm known only to battle and the man himself. He wielded the long, seven-foot blade as if it was an extension of his own arm. Anyone else would have found it unwieldy, an awkward thing to hold to when something was the same height as yourself, give or take a few inches, but for Sephiroth…

The battle didn’t last long after that, just a few seconds as the legendary man himself dispatched the Behemoth with a long, deep slice to the throat. And with a trick known only to himself, he managed to dodge in time to avoid having any of the blood splatter on him or his leather armor. Cleaning the blade on the purple fur of the dead creature, he strapped it back in its place along his back and turned to the new SOLDIER firsts.

To Cloud, his comrades’ fearful idolization was as clear to him as day over night was. He could sympathize with them, as he’d held that same emotion before towards Sephiroth. As their eyes met, cat-green to sky-blue, Cloud thought he would always feel some sense of idolization for the man, but it paled in comparison to everything else. Sephiroth had become a friend, and something far more, in the almost-year since he’d come back. He had yet to tell the man, of course, but what he’d told the General all those months ago wasn’t true anymore.

He knew what he was feeling now. The steady changing of his feelings, like a river moving inexorably downstream toward the ocean, was painfully clear. He didn’t question it anymore, how his idol-worship had changed to friendship then to like then to love. He had come into Sephiroth’s life and had a place beside Zack, seeing things no one else did.

The hidden, small smiles that were so clear to him thrummed through every inch of his body when he saw them. The quiet, amused laughter when he found something funny were as loud to him as Heidegger’s guffaws and a thousand times more pleasing. And sometimes he found himself staying up most of the night watching Sephiroth sleep on those rare occasions they’d fallen asleep on the same bed after a heavy night of touching, kissing, and talking.

He often found himself thinking that his life before, the one where he didn’t know Sephiroth, to be unbearable. How could he ever stand to live without this man? The one that was awkward but warm in his feelings to those he felt he could trust with his life? Cloud suppressed a chuckle when he thought back on the things that went through his head. Only someone as besotted as himself would dare think such things about the great General, wanting the man as his own with a possessive streak only a lover was capable of.

His introspection did last as long as he thought, the meeting of their eyes only a split second that had felt like eternity to him, and Sephiroth was gliding forward to assess their injuries. With a studying glance at the gored thigh, he cast a Cure 3 and then moved on to the dislocated shoulder.

“This will hurt when I relocate it,” he warned and only waited long enough for the boy’s nod of acknowledgement before pushing it back into place. There was a cry of pain and Cloud was rather pleased about that, as he wouldn’t like to see more injury done if the young man had bit his lip instead and tried to keep quiet. He’d have likely pierced the skin trying to keep quiet and ‘dignified’.

Cloud was the last one Sephiroth checked, getting down on one knee to be as level with Cloud’s crouching as he could. He could see in the man’s eyes why he’d been kept last: to avoid playing favoritism. The worry and caring was there, the urge to linger and check every bruise. He wasn’t sure what feelings Sephiroth had for him, if they’d changed at all in the last almost-year that they’d been ‘dating’, but the fact that Sephiroth cared to that extent over him, wanting to fuss just a little over his injuries, sent a thrill up his spine and warmth filling his belly with pleasure.

“I’m glad you’re all right,” Sephiroth whispered to him. “I was worried and couldn’t stay behind watching any longer.”

He narrowly avoided having a blush show on his cheeks. They’d both agreed to keep their relationship quiet until he was at least first class and blushing in front of others like that would have given it away instantly. Still, he aimed a small smile at Sephiroth, seeing a quickly aborted move of the older man’s hand, probably to pat him on the head or something.

“One day you’ll have to explain to me how you know so much,” Sephiroth added. “That sort of knowledge is based on personal experience…of many battles with such monsters.”

Even as Sephiroth stood and addressed them as a whole, telling them they were heading back to the meeting point to go back to Midgar, even though he was filled with pleasure at the little gestures and whispers from Sephiroth, a cold pit of worry slid into Cloud’s stomach amid the butterflies.

His secret might not last as long as he would hope.

Redemption, Ch11

2008-05-09T00:00:51Z

I hope this chapter makes up for the gap between 9 and 10, and the somewhat shortness of the last one. This one didn't turn out the way I expected it to, but I'm happy with it. The beginning was great, but after a certain page I didn't know what to do and inspiration struck when I thought of putting in THE INCIDENT pt2 :P I felt it was necessary to show rather than tell what was going on. Given the story, I'm thinking of marking this as the end of part 1 of the story and the next chapter might start maybe several months or even a year down the road. It's starting to bog down again and I don't want to lose momentum.

And on a more personal note: IT'S HOOOOOOOOOOOT MAKE THE SUN GO AWAY! :P

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 4,657
Chapter: Chapter 11/17
Status: Complete
Rating: R
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

Cloud wasn't sure how he did it, but he managed to land on his feet in a crouching position. It made his ankles fiercely protest, sending spikes of pain up his legs all the way to the knees before settling down to the muted ache as he rested there, trying to catch his breath. This hadn't gone right at all. It wasn't supposed to happen this way. Of all the things he'd hoped to accomplish, this wasn't exactly working out the way he'd planned or dreamed about.

Sephiroth stalked towards him and Cloud felt a shudder go down his spine when their eyes met. What had made him think he could do this? That he'd ever succeed? He'd been foolish, extremely stupid. As stupid as an adult as the young body he inhabited that had once been his own. The Masamune lifted almost in slow-motion, older mind calculating the angle it would land and dodging out of the only way he had.

After so long of fighting Sephiroth, he knew every move as intimately as he knew his body. It was likely the only thing that was keeping him one step ahead of his mentor. What on earth had possessed him to even suggest a spar between the two of them? Especially on a day that had been bad to start with? It was just one of those days where nothing you did went right. He'd gotten out of bed late, kept being distracted by memories of the night before, gotten called out by two teachers for his mind wandering, and had caught Tseng and Rufus in a compromising position and had listened to the quiet threats of not to reveal what he'd seen to anyone otherwise he'd find his life expectancy cut to a few seconds rather than a few years.

He'd always suspected the two had something going on, especially seeing them as he'd suspiciously watched the leader of the Turks care for their boss, but seeing Rufus pressed against the wall with Tseng's hand down his pants and making him pant hadn't been high on his list of priorities.

Not to mention he was still just a bit too dazed, perhaps even giddy, over the night before. Things had gotten right back into the routine after Sephiroth and Zack had returned from the trip to North Corel and Costa Del Sol, or so he had thought. He'd just started getting back into the swing of things when it was not Zack, but Sephiroth that was changing things about. It had been small things at first: an extra nod as they passed each other in the hall, the occasional agreement with Zack for the three of them to go out drinking, or a small container of lotion left behind for the back of his ankles that were rubbed raw from his socks and his boots after basic training out in the wilderness left him too exhausted to even shower.

Last night, however, had been different. Usually Zack was always somewhere in the mix or the background, smiling indulgently over the two of them and all but shoving themselves at each other. It hadn't escaped either of their notices that Zack was their biggest 'cheerleader' in terms of their relationship, urging for more when they were content to just take it small steps at a time. That was why he'd been surprised to find Sephiroth waiting for him outside his room door by himself.

Swords clanged as Cloud managed to keep one step ahead of the General in their spar, mostly due to his knowledge of how his mentor moved. Not unlike the graceful movements of the night before, Sephiroth managed to turn combat into an art form, more beautiful than the finest dance wearing the best of silks and velvets. Focusing on the sweat running down his face and neck kept the blush from appearing on his cheeks.

He could see now what won the war in Wutai. Seeing the beautiful man in action when insanity wasn't clouding his eyes was a very unique experience, though his body rather wished he wasn't on the receiving end. It was obvious to Cloud that the man was holding back at least some of his strength and it wasn't surprised. You didn't start getting mako injections until you were accepted into the SOLDIER program. Even candidates didn't get any and for Sephiroth to go full out on someone that had none yet in him was unfair in the extreme. Especially since this was meant to 'evaluate' him, not kill him.

Somewhere in the empty room he knew Zack was watching, but he couldn't take his eyes off the intense green gaze that burrowed into him, analyzing his every move and breath, learning details of what Cloud was about to do from the simplest of twitches of his lips. Cloud had an advantage though, one he wouldn't have had if he wasn't conditioned and hadn't experienced all the hardships he'd gone through before.

He knew how to bluff.

To Cloud, no matter where else, they were equal on the battlefield. Even if he couldn't hope to match his idol now, in this body, at that moment, to him they were still equals and though he revered him as much as always, he wasn't allowing that to get in his way. It wasn't the easiest, nor the happiest thing to do. He had to remind himself what the insane Sephiroth had been like, dredge up that old determination and hurt to beat off the good feelings he felt for the man before him that wasn't like the one he'd killed three times.

The cadet knew what would happen before it was done, but he was helpless to stop it when that much larger body whirled with too fast a move to follow with the eye and lashed out at his blade, one leg going behind his to trip him up. It was a move he'd seen done, had used on him, and with his older body he could have avoided it, perhaps even managed to turn it to his advantage, but it relied on conditioning to complete. He just didn't have the reflexes in this body to combat it.

Cloud landed hard on his back on the mats beneath them, the sword provided for him by Zack, a decent but lighter buster sword, landing somewhere behind his head. The Masamune touched his neck gently before pulling away, a silent but clear 'it's over' in the simple gesture. Silence reigned for a moment before clapping shattered it and they both looked over to the side at Zack's huge smile before he sauntered up and hauled the teenager to his feet.

“Great job Spike. You kept up with him almost twenty minutes. For someone your age and size without mako, that's a hell of an achievement. Yeah you lost and you weren't doing more than defending really, though you did get in a few jabs, it's still something worth praise. Can't wait to see you two fight when you get into SOLDIER.”

“If,” Cloud corrected, wiping sweat off his face and sighing.

“Don't be so down on yourself. He'll get in, right Sephiroth?”

Much to his surprise, Sephiroth tilted his head and thoughtfully nodded. “You were not exceptional in the standard definition of the term, but there is definite potential. It almost seems as if the knowledge is there, you just haven't been able to pull it off.” Cloud swallowed thickly at the heavy, almost suspicious pause that followed before the man continued. “I was wrong. I believe you do have what it takes to pass the tests. You're still rough around the edges, but you're a fast learner, agile, and quick thinker. We could use that in SOLDIER.”

“What Seph means,” Zack interjected before Cloud could ask, “is that we've got loads of jocks. Hell, even I'm one! I'm bulk and while I'm faster than most, I'm still a hard hitter and generally can a take a lot of hits before I go down, but I don't dodge well. I rely on the strength I've got. With very few exceptions, that's what everybody in SOLDIER is like. Only Sephiroth and a few others are as agile as you. Seph is unique, yeah, because he can hit as hard as fast as he can dodge, but we don't have any quick but light hitters, which is likely what you would be. You're fast and while you might not have the muscle to withstand a lot of hits, you'd likely rely on your agility to not get hit at all. We don't have many like that and it is an advantage. Most of light hitters go to the Turks before they get to SOLDIER because they need the light, subtle people.” An arm was thrown over his shoulder and he gasped at the tight, friendly hug he was pulled into. “But don't worry, we won't let the Turks get ya. We all know that your wants are with Seph and that nice, masculine sword of his.”

Seeing the lecherous grin and knowing that Zack wasn't referring to Masamune made Cloud turn red and he kicked hard at a convenient ankle. “Zack!”

“OW! Spike, stop the beating, I'm delicate!!” The black-haired SOLDIER ducked and dodged away from a raging blond-haired cadet and though he was perfectly capable of staying far out of reach, he was too busy laughing and enjoying the rise he'd managed to get out of his friend with his teasing. “Come on, Seph, help me out! Restrain the boyfriend!”

Sephiroth crossed his arms. “No. You deserve this for that crude comment.”

“Crude? It wasn't crude. Now if I had said co—”

Zack didn't remember much after that since both Cloud and Sephiroth had managed to deck him one something hard before he'd finished his sentence.

~*~

“I apologize if I made you feel awkward last night.” Cloud turned around in surprise, staring at the taller man as they stood at the cadet's door, and as he watched, red flushed up the young boy's cheeks in remembrance. “I heard that you've been distracted today and if it's because of what I did, then I apologize.”

“I-It was, but there's no need to apologize!” Cloud's outburst caught some passing Turks attention, most notably a very red-headed Turk with red tattoos on his cheeks and a lecherous smile was sent their way before they were alone. To spare what dignity he had left, Cloud tugged Sephiroth inside his room. They'd already dropped the unconscious Zack back at his own place, but since he'd been loathe to break their time apart and the rare moments the cadet had been fairly open with him, Sephiroth hadn't suggested they hurry.

He frowned, trying to figure it out though. “Then I should not apologize? I thought it was something that you wanted. You seemed to like it.”

Cloud's blush turned darker and he sat down on the edge of the bed. “I-I did like it, yeah, but it's not something that...I just wasn't expecting it is all and I've never...it's been a long time...”

“Does it embarrass you? Should I refrain from doing so in the future?”

He was just trying to understand and not trying to make Cloud have an aneurysm over it, but after their kissing, he hadn't missed the slightest bulge in his 'boyfriend's trousers the night before and had just touched him. Cloud had seemed to really enjoy it and the taste of the cadet as he'd licked his fingers hadn't been bad at all. He was far aware of his troops under his command and that even those men that were not attracted to other men often found company with them since ShinRa, with the exception of the Turks, never accepted women soldiers. Seeing some of the fierce female warriors in Wutai, Sephiroth had been spending much of his time trying to make his superiors see that it was in their best interest to allow women into their ranks, but for that they would not bend, not even for their precious general.

“I just...” Cloud licked his lips in nervousness and ran a hand through his spiky hair, trying to compose whatever was in his mind into words. “I liked it a lot, si-Sephiroth. I just wasn't expecting and nobody's ever done that to me before. It's natural for someone to feel embarrassed when someone they...like does that to them.”

“Like? I thought you said you loved me.”

At Sephiroth's confused expression, there was a small bout of helpless laughter. “I think...well...sometimes like is used instead of 'love' because 'love' can be a bit awkward to say for someone who's shy. Or if they find it a bit embarrassing to say if they're put on the spot like this.”

For a moment, he didn't say anything. He wanted everything settled in his mind before he dived into such a potent issue like Zack had been urging him to do. Their relationship had been very ambiguous. Even when they'd started doing more 'romantic' things as his lieutenant called them, they'd never really established who's feelings were what. Sephiroth hated ambiguity. It made it hard to act, to see what your opponent was up to.

“Do you love me or do you not? You said so in the hospital, but that was nearly four months ago and if I'm not incorrect, I think things have changed for the both of us. It is necessary to find out where we stand with each other.”

Blue eyes looked up at him rather helplessly. “I don't know. It's not just that I idolize you, not anymore. I really do like you, like kissing you, but I don't really know for certain what it is I feel. Sometimes I think it's just friendship; sometimes I think it's more than that. It's just moving really fast at the moment and I'm trying to keep up. I don't know if it's love because I don't think I've ever been in love in a...romantic way before.”

Sephiroth nodded slowly, recognizing several of the things Cloud had said corresponded with himself. He was unsure what he felt for the cadet. For the longest time, the only one he had ever really cared about more than as just a soldier to another was Zack. They'd always covered their backs, were equals, friends. Zack he trusted beyond anyone else. He had thought that's the way it would always remain until he'd met Cloud. Cloud was different to his feelings than Zack was. They weren't the same person and that was logical, but what wasn't logical was how his mood and emotions varied so often.

“I suggest then,” he stated at last, “that we remain as we have been. The pace is acceptable and we can take our time.”

“Not if Zack has anything to say about it.”

A small smile touched Sephiroth's lips. “Well we won't ask him, will we?”

Cloud blinked before laughing a little, a sound that Sephiroth had determined the last few months that he liked hearing. Perhaps it was so unusual and gratifying to hear it because the blond rarely did it. The smiles were slowly becoming more plentiful, but laughs were still so scarce. The haunted looks were retreating in number too, though they were still there when the cadet thought no one was looking. No one being Zack and Sephiroth. He didn't seem to care if anyone else saw them, because no one else cared either. They were just trying to survive their own lives, and had no attention to spare to anyone else.

What Cloud didn't seem to realize was that there was never a point when one of them wasn't watching him. Zack hadn't given up his mission to figure out what had changed his friend and Sephiroth was still very intrigued by the mystery of the person in front of him. Despite his appearance, it was hard to think of him as a boy. His bearing, his thoughts, his words all suggested someone older and sometimes it caught him by surprise when he realized just what age he really was.

Sephiroth leaned down, pressing their lips together and cutting of the sound of laughter. It was a bit on the abrupt side, Cloud not expecting it, but it had become something of a vice to the General. There was something vaguely addicting about kissing the young man, the way he'd moan softly and open his mouth to let their tongues meet, how he'd melt into Sephiroth's arms, giving as well as receiving, not willing to let Sephiroth lead entirely.

That was, maybe, another thing that Sephiroth really liked it and made it so enticing. Unlike others who'd entirely defer to him, Cloud accepted Sephiroth's lead but that didn't mean he wasn't contributing. Sometimes the cadet's enthusiasm surprised him and others he seemed to be struck with shyness. It was always a new reaction when they did it and he found himself just as interested in doing it for that reason, as well as the pleasure it caused.

The silver-haired man knew that if he let it go on longer it would just be a repeat of last night, but arms were sliding around his shoulders and there felt a degree of...comfort today. Unlike so many times before when they'd done this, Cloud was tense to varying degrees, as if he was thinking of a hundred different things. To Sephiroth, whenever they kissed the world narrowed to just the simple act so he could truly enjoy it, but until today, it hadn't seemed to be that way to Cloud.

Bending in half wasn't doing his back any good and so Sephiroth eased them back onto the bed, covering that smaller body with his own. He didn't think Cloud noticed, as his blue eyes were closed during their languid, pleasant kiss. It was nearly a continuous motion, only breaking apart to breathe when it was necessary and their movements so like a dance that the breaking seemed just as casual as everything else.

Aware of his strength and body mass compared to the small but sturdy cadet, he kept most of his weight on his arms. Cloud's legs shifted apart instinctively when he got settled, almost as if he didn't realize he'd done the movement, and Sephiroth smiled inwardly. This was rare and wonderful. Cloud wasn't tense in the slightest, as if he was, for once, living in the now and not thinking of anything else. Oh, he had no intention of progressing to sex at this stage, as he liked to take his own pace on things, but lying like this and kissing was something he was enjoying more than usual.

Awkwardly pulling off his gloves, Sephiroth let his hands wander and judged by the sounds of the male beneath him what he liked and what he liked better. Eyes were still shut, but the aura around Cloud said it was most likely because he was feeling too good to bother opening them. Sephiroth had half-feared that maybe they had stayed closed because Cloud didn't want to see what was going on and get tensed up, but given the completely relaxed body beneath him, that obviously wasn't the case.

What Cloud had been of no mind to notice last night was that Sephiroth had been in much the same situation as him and it was presenting itself again. He was definitely as physically attracted to Cloud as his mind was embroiled in the strange young man. Thankfully his leather had been tailored after years of fighting to be almost like a second skin so it wasn't too restricting with a slow hardening of his lower half was felt.

Leisurely kisses were becoming something altogether different, Sephiroth comfortable with taking the lead. In all honesty, he wasn't sure he'd be comfortable being led anywhere. For years, he led troops in battle, was at ease in the role of making decisions. This was much the same thing, though he never did anything he was unsure Cloud liked or wanted without making sure first. This wasn't precisely the same kind of leadership as in battle.

Blue eyes slid open gradually, looking soulful in their depths and something altogether too old for the cadet that Cloud was. Sephiroth could feel an answering desire pressing against his own, but everything ceased at the moment. Even though it had admitted he'd liked it last night, given how the other had acted, he wasn't sure if it was okay to do that again.

“Cloud, do you want me to touch you?”

A blush flooded the man's cheeks, reality seeming to come back a bit, but when Sephiroth tried to sit up, the arms around his shoulders tightened. Settling back down in curiosity, one leg wrapped around his hip. “I want you to touch me.”

The words were whispered, no doubt in the shyness that caused the blush to appear, but they were a positive answer and before he'd even thought about it, Sephiroth's hand had expertly unbuttoned Cloud's pants. He hadn't realized until that moment how much he enjoyed seeing Cloud's face flush with pleasure until he had the opportunity to see it again. Slowly he pulled the young cadet out, thumb moving to shift over that sensitive head and he smiled when he heard a moan of desire.

Lips moved down to curiously taste along the column of Cloud's throat, taking the time to explore and do things he hadn't done before. He soothed a small patch of red his kisses had made with his tongue, feeling a shiver go down Cloud's spine. Never before had he expected that his boyfriend would be so sensitive on his neck, but he was getting to see far more reactions between that and his stroking than he had the night before.

So busy was Sephiroth watching the expressions crossing Cloud's face that he was taken by surprise when a hand gently rubbed him through the leather of his pants. “Can I touch you?”

Sephiroth had no want to say no so he nodded. He found it rather amusing to watch Cloud struggle trying to loosen the leather while attempting to think around what the older man was doing with his hand. Sephiroth wasn't letting up and nibbled the edge of the cadet's jaw with relish, pressing his thumb a little more firmly into the bundle of nerves right beneath the base of his head and hearing a faint cry at the action.

Finally, though, hand and eye coordination seemed to coincide and Sephiroth let a small puff of air in a gasp when fingers stroked his heated flesh. He'd touched himself a few times before, but not often. Most of the time he was too tired or annoyed or had no free moment for it, and he hadn't realized until just then how good it felt for someone else to touch him. Especially a cadet that had he was starting to like to an almost frightening degree.

Their fingers were as slow as their kisses had been before, taking their time. Cloud liked to play with his hair and though he usually disliked anyone touching it, he made an exception. A smile formed on the lips he was kissing passionately. “Never doubted your color was natural, but nice to know I was right,” Cloud murmured quietly, his eyes seeming to twinkle a little in happy amusement.

Sephiroth chuckled, feeling slim fingers exploring around his base where his hair was, twirling the silver around before sliding back up. Given his height and girth, naturally Sephiroth's desire was equally large in size, but once Cloud seemed to get over at least some of the embarrassment, Sephiroth was happy to see that there was no comparison going on.

He would have liked to stay there like that all day, just exploring and experience such wonderful pleasure, but he had work to do, unfortunately, and his body was complaining loudly. When his hand sped up on Cloud's erection, so did Cloud on his. Sephiroth was quiet, his faint gasps broken up only by low moans. This sort of moment was private and he had no wish for anyone, Turks or otherwise, to hear what was going on. He doubted a Turk would say anything, though. He and Rufus had an...understanding about their personal lives. The Turks obeyed the Vice President more than the person who signed their checks and if Rufus wanted to keep anyone from finding out about his relationship with Tseng, he knew better than to let his Turks gossip about any relationship Sephiroth might engage in.

Cloud whimpered and Sephiroth found the sound so cute that he squeezed tightly-but-briefly again, feeling the cadet arch into his touch. Legs wrapped around Sephiroth's waist and he shifted his position just a little, thrusting into hands that had somehow managed to go around and press their erections together. The friction was absolutely exquisite and he found himself leaning toward perhaps sex a bit more in the near future than he'd originally planned, if it would be better than this.

The only thing that stayed that thought was the fact that he wanted to wait until Cloud made it into SOLDIER first. Sephiroth had no doubt that he could do it and it would make a nice 'congratulation' gift. If things panned out, anyway. That sweet little mouth was whimpering nonsense words and he couldn't help taking them in a powerful kiss, his free hand coming up to hold Cloud's head still as he passionately plundered his mouth of the tastes and sensations.

Cloud pulsed against his hand, letting him know how close he was so he was prepared when the young man cried out his completion into his mouth. Sephiroth broke apart only to lift his hand to his mouth and lick the sticky substance off them, despite the blush it gave Cloud as he watched. The hand that had been playing with his hair came down and Sephiroth groaned when both were wrapped around his desire and stroking him for all they were worth.

If he didn't know better, he would have thought Cloud was smirking when he came, but the expression when he was able to see clearly again was the same one as always in situations like this so Sephiroth chalked it up to his imagination. Their kisses turned leisurely once more as they rested in their orgasmic glow, Sephiroth leaving more kiss marks behind. Cloud seemed to melt beneath him at all the attention, arms draping themselves casually over his larger shoulders.

“Okay, which one of you was it that knocked me o—oh.”

Sephiroth glanced toward the open door at his lieutenant who stood there in a dumbstruck state. In fact, if Sephiroth wasn't mistaken, that had to be the first time he'd ever seen Zack at a loss for words. Cloud turned an even darker shade of red and buried his face in the silver-haired man's shoulder to hide from the teasing words as soon as Zack got his wits together.

A grin slowly formed on his friend's face. “Seph, didn't know that was your natural color—”

Zack would have one helluva a headache, Sephiroth thought, watching the man fall unconscious to the floor after being hit with a heavy, hardbound book detailing tactics that had been sitting on the desk. Ah well, a few more hours of quiet time. It wouldn't last, it never did, but for now... he smiled and went back to kissing Cloud, even if the young man was as red as a tomato.

Maybe because he was as red as a tomato.

Right Where We Belong

2008-05-04T23:03:55Z

More Mal/Tuari-ness finally got proofread!

*Note: contains extended scenes of m/m sex. Not for minors or homophobes.*

06 - Right Where We Belong

Summary: After even just a short time apart, Tuari and his huge lover, Malachai, miss each other terribly and cannot wait to get back in each other's arms. First, however, Malachai needs to help Atrios recover from the massive rage that caused the firball which wiped out the small settlement of Border Watch. In his weakened state, the Flame Atronach is safely guarded by the massive Xivilai.

Redemption, Ch10

2008-04-17T00:34:30Z

Yes, I do realize this might be considered a 'boring' chapter by some, but I honestly struggled something awful with it for the past two months, ever since I posted chapter 9. It's a turn-over point where nothing really happens and as such, writing slowed to a crawl. And of course it didn't help that I'm immersed into writing Oblivion stories, as those who visit this journal know. I'm hoping chapter 11 will be better...once I can figure out what happens. I've got the whole ending of the bloody story planned out, or mostly. I know what happens there. It's just this middle area that's unsure. Sorry it took so long to post, and I'll try to work on it more frequently, but in the midst of 3D modeling and other stuff, I forget a lot. :P

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 2,275
Chapter: Chapter 10/17
Status: Complete
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

Sephiroth had never been fond of Costa Del Sol. Too many gawking tourists and the heat always made him irritable. Even Zack kept his antics to a minimum, not wanting to rile the silver-haired General into a bout of irritation that would only end up with several bruises on his head, among other things. It was supposed to be a thinly veiled 'vacation' for the star of ShinRa, but the bigwigs had no idea that it was the exact opposite to Sephiroth.

Zack usually took the brunt of his friend's bad mood, but on this trip he had decided to do something different. Usually he tried to distract Sephiroth with sparring, but this time he had another option available: Cloud Strife. He'd been working hard, exceptionally hard, at getting the close-lipped man to tell him what happened that night before they left, but Sephiroth had always waved him off before with a blurb about duty and all that.

Now that they were in Costa Del Sol, though, they both knew that technically they weren't on duty. It wasn't that he thought Sephiroth was trying to evade telling him what happened, but his friend was the General and took his responsibilities seriously. Because of his focus on what he had to do, many trip-ups by executives trying to make him look bad had been thoroughly trounced by the facts.

“So, Sephiroth.” A wary glance was sent at him as they made their way to the mansion that the company owned. It was technically the President's, but nobody ever told the man that they used it whenever they were in Costa Del Sol. Even the Turks appropriated it when they were in town and since President ShinRa rarely left Midgar, he never knew.

“What is it, Zack?”

“You gonna tell me what happened now with Cloud or not?”

Sephiroth sighed, keeping Zack in suspense until they were inside the mansion and their small platoon of soldiers were squared away in the guest rooms or the sofa. Every trooper knew better than to mention to anyone else that they'd been in the house, because if they did and someone who wasn't supposed to hear caught wind of it, there would be no nice trips through and they liked their rare comfort.

“There is not much to say, Zack. He came up, we talked, I sent him back when it was late.”

“Then why, pray tell, was Cloud's face red and he wobbled a little when he came back to his room, huh? I was there waiting for him and he looked like a cherry! Even my teasing didn't get a reaction, so you must have done something big.” He didn't think it had been anything physical, it wouldn't have occurred to Sephiroth to do anything, really, but Cloud had locked himself in the small, adjoining bathroom to avoid Zack's questions, so he knew it was something 'important'.

There was a slow dawning of realization of what Zack wanted to know about on Sephiroth's face and he shrugged. “I kissed him.”

“You what?!” Seeing heads turn at his loud, incredulous voice, Zack tugged Sephiroth to a small corner to continue the discussion. “Say that again.”

“More accurately, he kissed me first. Seeing the awkwardness of it and lacking finesse, I showed him how it was done.” A faint smile touched the General's lips. “It was quite...nice.”

“You can't be serious!” Zack muttered, brain spluttering to a halt. “Cloud kissed you first?! The little chocobo head? The one who doesn't talk, the one who thinks over for a year before he does something, the one that practically worships the ground you walk on, that Cloud?”

Sephiroth sighed and rolled his eyes. “Private Cloud Strife, yes.”

Zack giggled with glee that turned into howling laughter and he had to clutch the taller man to keep from standing. Suddenly the young cadet's reactions and what he had done made so much more sense. Cloud was never going to hear the end of it, ever.

Not if he had anything to say about it.

0-0-0

Cloud was rather proud of how well will could play a part in something. He wasn't sure if he'd be able to hold First Tsuguri for any length of time, but sheer will amid the slow toning of his body during basic training had allowed him to get the entire full sword into the air for a minute or two. Many might not consider it a great achievement, but considering what he'd started out from, he was quite happy.

And more than determined not to let what happened before happen again. He wouldn't be unprepared this time. Even if it happened again, even if they were sent to Nibelheim again, if he was a good enough fighter, he might be able to at least keep up with Sephiroth a little. Between himself and Zack, they might have enough expertise to bring Sephiroth down enough to get through to him before his mind was completely corrupted.

He wasn't entirely sure what it was that JENOVA had done to Sephiroth really. Naturally knew that his mentor had gone insane, but he wasn't sure of the specifics to combat them. What should be done differently? Would, for example, having a 'lover' make any difference at all, or was it something else that JENOVA exploited, promised to Sephiroth that the Great General never had?

For all that everyone thought Sephiroth was more than privileged with what he was given, Cloud knew that the man he looked up to had less than most normal people. Material things he was given after he'd proved himself during the war, but before that, it was just years of torture in the name of science at the hands of Hojo and nothing given to him that he had as his own. Constantly told he would be a weapon, allowing no one but Hojo to see said weapon when he was young and easily influenced... There was so much that Sephiroth never had.

It just made Cloud want to kill the scientist even more. He'd entertained the thought of putting Hojo through all he'd given to everyone else, but he wouldn't put it past the greasy man to enjoy being tortured or even ordering others around for their incompetence while being strapped to a table with needles sticking out of every part of his skin and orifice. Seemed like the kind of thing that would get Hojo off.

Cloud had never really remembered what happened during his training because of his incarceration at the hands of Hojo for five years; it had made his memory more than a little hazy, but even if the experiments hadn't happened, there was hardly anything to remember. Day after day passed by without so much as a blink, like a gray endless cloth with no designs or landmarks to identify that space as any different than the one preceding it or after it.

By the time two weeks had passed, he was near climbing the walls. He hadn't realized how...dreary life was in the ShinRa military without a smile around. Zack gave life to the place, which made it small wonder that next to Sephiroth, the black-haired man would be next in line for being the ShinRa's poster boy in terms of recruiting others. Zack had a natural charm that he was quite willing to spread on anyone regardless of rank or duty. Very rarely had he seen that smile waver or an angry expression or harsh words on his lips.

Nor had Cloud been able to deny that he missed seeing that flash of silver hair around a corner when he might be walking in the hallway at the right time. For the past few months, he'd gotten rather used to being around the General. It wasn't quite so hard to talk anymore, at least if he wasn't looking at the handsome man. If he did, though, he'd get tongue-tied as always, like he had the night before the two had left with a small platoon on their field mission.

Thinking about it, naturally, led him to think about the kiss and he blushed to the roots of his hair again. He might not be so in body, but his mind was that of a twenty-three year old and still he blushed over something like that! There was just something about Sephiroth that always got under his skin. He was never able to ignore the man, before his insanity or after. Jibes always found a mark and he was never able to look away. Even being calmer and older in his head, knowing the horrors that he'd gone through that had aged him exponentially and took away a childish innocence, if he'd ever possessed one, could not change that fundamental reaction. He felt young around Sephiroth, yet that all-encompassing aura of the General's was so confident that you were sure nothing could ever happen to you around him.

His lips tingled a bit in remembrance of a strong, chiseled mouth against his own. Never, even with his long hair, could Sephiroth be called anything but masculine. He was handsome, not pretty. The sharp features, the strong bones, and eyes. He was gorgeous but nowhere near feminine. Nor, he thought idly, was that body anything close to it. Muscles were sharply defined, with a chest that was rather incredibly deep and impressive, and still he managed to look sleek. There was no one on the planet that looked even close to Sephiroth. Even Vincent, who Cloud had considered to be one of the most 'handsome' men in terms of elegance, paled to that of Sephiroth. At least to Cloud.

He wasn't sure if it was because he was lost in thought or because SOLDIERs were trained to be quiet, but he didn't even know he wasn't alone in his little spot out by a tree, the barracks building behind him. It wasn't until violet eyes were suddenly staring at him that he blinked and realized he had company. Spiky black hair seemed exceptionally lively that day as Zack asked instead of hello, “Thinkin' about that kiss?”

“GAH!” To Cloud, such a startled shriek was a rather justified reaction, but Zack laughed so hard he landed on the ground at it. He kicked his bigger friend repeatedly for both scaring at him and cackling before something else hit him.

If Zack was back, so was...

“Hello, Cloud.”

Swallowing, he looked behind him. There was no wind to blow silver hair out like a flag, nor ruffle the black leather coat like he thought should have happened, but the General still stood there, watching them calmly. And he swore there seemed to be a hint of amusement at the edges of cat-like green eyes.

“Hello...sir...” It was clearly obvious, by the duffel bags at Sephiroth's feet, that Zack had forced them to detour from their heading toward their apartments upon seeing a spike of blond hair amid the grass. Zack wasn't able to resist any impulse, like that of a child, so it was at Cloud's expense that he was currently finding severe amusement. If that was the right term for his friend laughing so hard that he was crying.

“How was your mission, sir?”

Sephiroth shrugged, stepping forward to join the two on the small hillside that could be considered part of the training grounds if it wasn't so far away and too hard to get to with a regiment of forty clumsy teenage recruits. “There was nothing particular to report. The reactor is functioning well, most of the inhabitants of the town accepting of it.” Though nothing was indicated toward it, there was a faint air as if Sephiroth believed it to be a waste of effort for the travel.

“Come on, Seph,” Zack contradicted, seeming to at least get control of himself. “You know it was an exercise so they could rightfully consider giving you a 'vacation'.”

“I would hardly consider going to Costa Del Sol as a vacation, Zack.”

“Everybody but you would, Seph. That's why the morons upstairs sent you there, because they don't know you.” Turning to Cloud, he grinned. “See, Seph hates Costa Del Sol. Too hot and noisy and every other bad thing someone could possibly hate he considers is there. Except Hojo. If Hojo ever vacationed at Costa Del Sol, that would mean the world was coming to an end.”

Remembering finding Hojo surrounded by three 'beauties' on the beach in his lab coat at said resort town made Cloud snicker, much to his own surprise. For so long, everything regarding saving the world, even the happiest of moments when they tried to forget about the reason they were all together, was such a serious affair to him. It was hard to imagine laughing about anything until now, and he still wasn't sure why. Maybe it was because, being in this time, he was so far removed from it.

One day, he thought as he watched Sephiroth corral Zack into picking up his bag and beckoning Cloud over as they headed back to the cluster of buildings in the ShinRa compound, he would allow himself to forget. When everything was over, when the most critical of time was passed. If he could pass through the age of sixteen and the incident with Nibelheim never happened, then he could allow those awful memories of death and horror and grief to fade.

Yes, that will be a wonderful day indeed.

Wanted

2008-04-05T16:12:35Z

Despite being generally exhausted from all the 3D modeling I'm doing and all the writing for Oblivion, I'm still alive. I am, also, working on Chapter 10 of Redemption, but it's slow going when I have the time. I got an awful lot done today so in a day or two, I'll go back and read it over, see where I need to add, then continue on. In the meantime, here's another story:

Wanted

This takes place sometime after a story written with arty and AlienSlof, Breaking and Entering, that arty and I wrote together after that. Read it if you wish to, it is a very good story, though there are no specific references to it in Wanted except a very minor one.

Summary: Vesper, the white clouded leopard, was having a nice run and things were going so well until a chance encounter lands him with a spitting, hissing problem. He meets another Khajiit and at first sparks fly, but soon they realize that they're in the same heap of trouble and the only way out might be to help each other...

*Note: describes male on male sexual activity. Adult only.

Rutendo is my character, and Vesper is arty's :) Some screenies of Ru are here:

Rutendo1
Rutendo2
Rutendo3
Rutendo4
Rutendo5

Breaking The Cycle

2008-03-16T23:11:51Z

Despite being bloody exhausted after working a double shift at the hospital, I'm here to give you more stuff to read :D This is another series that Kikai and I are doing that have no relation to the other stuff.

Summary for the series: A curious spawnling and a lovelorn elder stumble upon each other in the endless wastelands surrounding the fringes of Mehrunes Dagon’s realm, the Deadlands. V’sraek is about to face his biggest challenge yet: raising a Frost Atronach spawnling.

01 - Breaking The Cycle

Hopelessly Addicted & The Coldest Night

2008-03-13T02:42:40Z

The second and third in the Ut/Ri stories:

Hopelessly Addicted

&

The Coldest Night

Show Me Love; Dangerous Heat

2008-03-10T23:15:58Z

More story of Malachai and Tuari. And a very clear warning that must be said from Slof's site, before people read: *Note: Both these stories contain male/male sex and Dangerous Heat contains torture and sexual violence. Not for the faint-hearted or homophobes.

Show Me Love

Summary: While Atrios and Malachai are away dealing with the problem of Endryn, The Daedric Prince, Daeinde, has to keep young Tuari occupied.

Dangerous Heat

Summary: Tuari's former lover, Endryn Andaren, made a terrible mistake when he sent the Dark Brotherhood assassins after Malachai. Now, the angry Xivilai wants revenge, and he intends to extract it with extreme prejudice.

Wherever I Roam + pix

2008-02-29T22:42:20Z

More story, this time of a different pair. Written with Kikaimegami.

Wherever I May Roam

Summary: Riordan seeks ever more powerful foes to see who can take him down, but when a particularly hard battle forces him to summon a Xivilai, he finds that maybe it's a blessing in disguise.

Some pics:

This Road I'm On; All I Need

2008-02-26T16:49:24Z

Ah for those of you a fan of my writing, and are waiting for more Redemption, I'll get back to it, I swear. I've just got too much at the moment. Because you see, I was not idle the last few weeks ;) I've been writing nonstop from the moment I get up until I go to bed on some Oblivion stories with a few friends. Since they said it was okay, I'll post linkage to them so that you can read them.

WARNING: They are male on male in nearly all of them, with lots of smut amid the plot. This is on the highest NC-17 scale and not work safe. You have been warned :P

01 - This Road I'm On

Summary (written by AlienSlof, since I suck at them): This started out as an email roleplay by Sen-Chan and myself as we liked each other's characters; it later evolved into a little story. It follows the chance meeting of Tuari, a lonely Dunmer man and Malachai, my wandering, ever-horny Xivilai and the budding friendship that blossomed between them.

*Contains m/m sex in detail. Adults only.*

02 - All I Need

Summary: Tuari meets an ex-lover, the one who caused him so much pain. Where is Malachai when he needs him most?

*Contains male/male sex in detail.*

03 - Our Solemn Hour

Summary: This is the third story in the Malachai/Tuari saga, and this time, things take a turn for the worst as Tuari's past catches up with them in the worst way possible. There are many changes in the air for our boys.

*Note: This story contains graphic male-on-male action and is not for minors, homophobes or delicate dispositions.

There are other stories that come after this. The fourth to be proofread, and the fifth to be finished. Sixth must be written and seventh needs to be edited.

An illustration picture: Malachai and Tuari Malachai is AlienSlof's character, and Tuari is mine.

There are other stories as well that I'm working on with another friend, but those haven't been edited yet either so they're not done yet. Again, I stress that these are male/male in detail, nor for the faint of heart. In later chapters of the story, there is also detailed torture. Do not read if you have issues with violence and rape (again in later chapters). You have been warned.

I also advise that the later stories be read with a lot of time. The fourth is 88 pages in Word and it will take you a while to go through them. Oh, and as there are several different kinds of talking, I'll list what they mean here in case it's not clear in the story.

"blah blah blah" <-- means speaking in the mortal language
"blah blah blah" <-- means speaking in the Daedric language
/blah blah blah/ <-- this and any variation with the slash in front means speaking telepathically.
blah blah blah <-- thoughts

EDIT: For those of you like misuki_ferret that have trouble accessing the links, try this:

http://www.slofshive.co.uk/index.php and Enter it
On the left should be navigation links, so please find "Fiction" and go there. Up near the top are quick-links for authors, so you can find "AlienSlof & Sen-chan's Stories" or "AlienSlof, Kikaimegami & Sen-Chan's Stories". You might have to scroll up just a little if it overshoots it, there are only three on there now.

The site is best viewed in Firefox.

Redemption, Ch09

2008-02-02T06:58:58Z

I know, it's been a long while since I've posted something, but I've been exceptionally busy with RL, Oblivion, and 3D modeling. However, I hope this chapter more than makes up for the wait. I'll explain in 10 how Seph gets his knowledge ;)

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 3,758
Chapter: Chapter 9/17
Status: Complete
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

Though Cloud was the first to admit that he was rather excessively paranoid, he would swear there were more Turks around than before. He couldn’t prove it, nor could he actually prove that they were there watching him. They never looked at him, they were just themselves, but there seemed to be more in the corridors than he was used to.

Or it could be his paranoia talking again.

If he was right though, he knew why he might be watched. ShinRa was, if possible, even more paranoid than himself. They had security cameras everywhere and had security cameras watching the security cameras practically. They surely would have noticed by now that Sephiroth had finally taken an interest in someone other than Zack Fair.

Or not. There had to be over a hundred cameras, maybe twice that, in the whole building. He couldn’t imagine someone being physically able to watch all those monitors for twenty-four hours and spot everything going on. Even Sephiroth couldn’t do it. Maybe nobody was even paying attention and no one knew about his sudden invitation to the General’s apartment.

And maybe Hojo would grow a heart and kill himself to spare humanity. ShinRa wasn’t stupid. They liked their power and what kept them in power was their General. He would be surprised if they didn’t know everything the tall man did.

That then begged the question of why he wasn’t interrogated. Maybe they knew, but didn’t dare interfere? Sephiroth wouldn’t put up with that and they wanted to keep the man happy. So what did one do to make sure they kept their General from anyone gaining influence over him and yet not meddle too much and risk the wrath of said General?

Watch the new variable like a hawk, that’s what. Cloud knew that it wasn’t because he was special. He was sure that they had done the same thing when Zack had become Sephiroth’s friend and most likely had tried to interfere and had been figuratively back-slapped by their prize war machine. Unlike the ranks themselves, the ShinRa brass didn’t care if Cloud was a lowly recruit. They had no concept of favoritism when it came to Sephiroth, so long as they didn’t lose him.

Of course, there was no way to prove any of his conjectures, but Cloud’s twenty-three year old mind was pretty sure that’s what it was. And who better to watch than their precious Turks, trained for subtlety? ShinRa didn’t skimp on their weapons: SOLDIER for up-front combat and Turks for silent assassinations and things that didn’t need to be shown on the news.

He had to admit that the Turks were good at what they did. If he hadn’t been as paranoid as he was, he wouldn’t have even noticed the slight extra and they’d done it so gradually over the last few weeks that he didn’t even detect the change until after he’d left Sephiroth’s office.

Over the last few months since he’d been ‘sent back’, Cloud had learned one very important rule: Decide what’s most important. Which meant when he saw something like this, he asked himself could he do anything about it? Not really. And since he couldn’t, there was no point in worrying about it. He had enough to do as it was, without adding more to his plate than he already had. Instead, he looked forward to spending more time with Sephiroth that night, even if he doubted they’d have a lot of time.

-0-0-0-

“Don’t worry Cloud. So long as you don’t sit in Seph’s Favorite Chair, you’ll be fine. No close encounters with Masamune, no death glares, no saluting. Come on, he’s trusting you enough to let you into his home, even if it is in the ShinRa building, so he’s obviously not going to kill you for doing something stupid.”

Zack’s reassurances weren’t as reassuring as he thought, but Cloud clung to them with all the strength of will he had. Now that he was actually outside Sephiroth’s door, he was having second thoughts. It had seemed like a good idea at the time. Actually, no. It had seemed like a great idea at the time, get in as much time with the general as he could and hope it would change things.

But like all things of this nature, when the time came, it seemed like the exact opposite of a great idea.

The idea of going back, however, was even less appealing. Given the suspicious and incredulous stares he’d gotten from the guards he’d passed and the card that had been scanned repeatedly to let him pass on to the higher, VIP floor, he knew they’d think that Sephiroth had kicked him out and that would destroy what little ego he had left.

So he persevered and knocked on the door.

If he had expected to wait long, which he hadn’t, he would have been surprised at how promptly the door had been opened. He didn’t have any time to think that Sephiroth had been waiting just for him, since the items under his arms were clearly going to be packed into a small duffel bag. The door must have been on the man’s way.

Cloud blinked when he realized that Sephiroth’s eyes were cataloguing him and he looked down to see why. He had chosen to forgo his military uniform, in hopes that it might, just a little, ease the atmosphere for himself. He didn’t think it would mean much to Sephiroth, who was always ‘on duty’, but it would be a reminder to himself that he wouldn’t have to salute to everything the general said in his presence.

“Come in.”

“Almost finished packing, sir?” he asked as he came in and let the door whoosh close behind him, feeling remarkably proud of himself for keeping a straight, calm tone of voice instead of speaking with the butterflies in his stomach.

“Yes.” As always, Sephiroth was so efficient that Cloud didn’t get a chance to see the miscellaneous items he had packed away, all neatly ordered, though they both knew that in five seconds of being in a duffle bag, they’d be tossed around mixing with other things.

Wondering which chair was ‘Seph’s Favorite Chair’ and consequently the one to avoid, he glanced around the apartment, noticing how sparsely furnished of personal items it was. It had all the state of the art equipment, but there didn’t seem to be a single thing there that said clearly who that person was. Oh, you could tell someone spent time there, but it didn’t feel lived in.

“Does it meet with your approval?”

Cloud blinked to realize that Sephiroth was looking at him again. More precisely, he was looking at Cloud looking at the apartment. In another time, as another person entirely, a younger Cloud would have stammered a yes immediately and stared at his feet, heartily embarrassed and horrified at being caught staring and making judgments about his idol’s life. Now he merely shrugged.

“Feels lifeless,” he said truthfully. “There’s no little things that says this is somebody’s home.”

“And tell me, Cloud, what makes a place feel like somebody’s home?”

He never got used to Sephiroth saying his without malice or the desire to cause pain. His name was free of those emotions, now tinted with curiosity, amusement, and a hidden knowledge that Cloud didn’t have. It unnerved him as it always did, sending little thrills down his spine that he didn’t want to exam too closely, and stepped over to the wall that was made of glass. He actually liked heights a lot, something he had in common with Vincent and Cid. It had helped the three of them bond when it had become absolutely necessary.

“Well…like a coffee mug sitting on a table that hasn’t yet been cleaned up. Or a book that hasn’t been put away. Furniture moved slightly so that it's not perfectly symmetrical. A bit of dust that’s accumulated when someone hasn’t gotten around to cleaning it.” He paused before continuing, realizing that he was speaking of his own room back in Tifa’s Seventh Heaven in Edge. He hadn’t realized the similarities until now. The image of the room came to mind, perfectly clear, and he began to talk of what that room had missed.

“Pictures of people that you care about.” Tifa had pictures in her room, but though she’d given him a copy of each, he’d never gotten around to getting a frame and putting it up. “Stuff that says what hobbies you like.” Denzel had started taking up fiddling with mechanical things and was always there whenever Cid came to visit. Little parts were scattered all over the bar and rooms, even in the bathroom…except Cloud’s room.

“Things people have given you as a gift.” All the things he’d been given he always took with him because he needed them in some way. The one time Marlene had given him something he didn’t need to use, he had left it in the church for Aeris’ spirit to play with. “Items you use a lot but haven’t put away yet because you just bring it out again.” Everything he’d ever used was always carried on his person so never put anything away in that room. “Little touches to decorations, like maybe a little figurine you got as a prize one time or something pretty you bought and couldn’t let go. Things like hairbrushes to set on a dresser or watches and things to set down next to a bed.

“A bed that’s slept in but hasn’t been made after you get up.”

A quick flash of light from one of the beacons nearby against a lower-floor window shattered his revere and he realized that Sephiroth had been listening attentively while he’d packed up the rest of his things he’d need for his mission. Suddenly embarrassed, he shifted from foot to foot until the older man gestured for him to sit down in the left-hand chair near the glass wall.

There was an awkward moment of silence, at least to Cloud’s end, as he fumbled for something to say, but Sephiroth beat him to it. And oddly enough, the slight shifting of focus in the subject managed to dissolve the discomfort of the moment.

“Given that you know Zack as well as I do, I had assumed a different answer. I have seen his rooms and they take what you described to the extreme. I wish I could inject him with an ounce of cleanliness with his mako injections.”

Cloud chuckled, for he knew Sephiroth spoke the truth. The first time he had ever seen Zack Fair’s room, he had been absolutely horrified. Cloud had always known he had a rather strong ‘neat’ sense, but anyone with any hint of orderliness would have panicked at the sight of that room. Clothes were tossed haphazardly, dishes still left out and waiting to be cleaned, books and materia littering the floor like confetti paper.

“Zack’s room is the incarnation of chaos,” he said with a smile, eyes staring over Sephiroth’s shoulder. He wasn’t quite sure he dared look at the General directly just yet. If he did, he feared he might lose his wits entirely and become unable to speak. Even with a twenty-three year old mind, the true Sephiroth was still able to make his mind go all gooey and mental and his mouth tongue-tied and silent.

“I have seen worse, but not by much,” Sephiroth commented, zipping up his duffel bag and dropping it by the door, probably for a quick and easy grab on the way out.

“And back to the original subject. I don’t use this particular room much. ShinRa gave me nearly half this floor, that’s how large this ‘apartment’ is, but I’m not here often enough as it is, and what time I am here is spent in other rooms that I find more preferable.”

“You don’t like heights?” he guessed, just wanting to say something so Sephiroth would talk more. It didn’t matter what, just anything at all.

The silver-haired man moved over to stand at the glass wall and looked down at the expansive buildings of ShinRa’s military base and shrugged. “I neither like nor dislike them. They don’t mean much to me.”

“Then why don’t you like the room?”

Sephiroth looked faintly puzzled, tilting his head in a way that Cloud had never seen and that he thought was adorably cute. His hair shown prettily in the light and caressed his cheeks and when Cloud realized the turn his thoughts were taking he had to bite the inside of his lip to keep his blush from appearing.

“I can’t explain it. I have been trying to figure out why I don’t like this room for awhile now, and I have yet to come up with an answer that is satisfactory. I just…don’t.”

He was sorely tempted to say that someone like Sephiroth probably hated not knowing why he felt a particular way, but a niggling worry that he might overstep his bounds kept the comment silent and unrealized in words. Sephiroth shrugged off the topic with a move of his big shoulders and it was then that Cloud realized something else.

Sephiroth wasn’t wearing his usual leather.

He’d never seen Sephiroth wear anything else.

And he certainly had never see Sephiroth wear downy-gray, knitted sweatshirt with a tiny Masamune sewn on the shoulder. Even the black slacks didn’t drag his attention away from that little sword and it was inevitable that Sephiroth would glance down to see what he was looking at. His comment to such staring was merely…

“Ah.”

“Uh…sir…where—?”

“Would you be surprised if I told you Zack knitted it?”

That floored him. He had never been so surprised in his entire life. His jaw dropped in an unflattering way and Cloud was sure he was looking like a fish gaping on shore as it tried to breathe. “Z-Z-Z-Z…”

“Zack,” was the calm, supplied word with a hint of amusement.

“Zack. K-K-K…”

“Knit.”

“Zack. Knit. S-s-s…”

“Sweater.”

And for the first time, he heard Sephiroth laugh. Truly laugh. He was sure that Zack had been the only one to ever have that pleasure before and he could only gape at how…wonderful it sounded. Like the most well-trained and well-disciplined singers could only dream of, music in a way that he couldn’t describe. And if it came because of his stupid expression, well then…he’d wear all the stupid expressions he could to hear it again.

“It is something that Zack tries to keep quiet. Apparently his mother insisted upon him learning the art even though he was not the girl she was hoping for. He made it for me after the Wutai war. At that time, I…wasn’t really feeling myself. After all that had happened, I was losing faith in everything, even myself. I have never felt so…depressed before or now than I had then. I suppose he did it to make me laugh. Who else would knit me a sweater with Masamune on it? For once I was grateful for my long hair, because it hides what’s on the back.”

Now Cloud’s interest was piqued and though he didn’t say anything, apparently his expression begged enough for him that Sephiroth sighed in amusement, turned around, and lifted up his hair.

Cloud nearly choked.

It wasn’t that it was Sephiroth wielding the Masamune that caused the reaction. No, it was the fact that both the Masamune and Sephiroth were chibi. They were no bigger than a baby chocobo and twice as wide and the attempted fierce expression on the knitted face of Sephiroth just came off as adorable. For the first time in Cloud’s life, he understood the urge of girls such as Aeris who would suddenly burst out with, “How cuuuute!”.

Instead he coughed a little as the general let down his hair again, but there remained a curl at the edges of his lips that said he was in a good mood.

And after that, like all good things, time sped up because Cloud didn’t want it to. Before he knew it, their conversation that had ranged over all sorts of topics had come down to Sephiroth suggesting that he should head back to his room soon. And of course ‘soon’ meant ‘right now’.

It was only as he reached the door that he paused. He paused because Sephiroth had said something that he didn’t expect and his ears turned bright red. He felt like a damn teenager again as he stared at Sephiroth, who apparently thought he didn’t understand him and repeated it.

“If this is a date, isn’t it customary for the two participants to kiss before it ends?”

Zack was obviously having a great deal of effect on the general, even if it appeared as if the silver-haired man was only asking and not indicating that he was about do anything at all.

And yet the question brought to the forefront the things that Cloud had spent all their time avoiding in his head: he had asked Sephiroth for a date and that date was in Sephiroth’s room, and this was not just a ‘friend’ meeting. If there was any point that he was going to really push this into a relationship, it had to be now. Part of him told him that he wasn’t ready for it, that he didn’t want to do this, to take the safe route and just be friends, but Cloud knew that the moment he had met his idol again, his idol that wasn’t insane, it was too late for the ‘safe’ route.

How fine a line was there between idolized worship and maybe something nearing love? Because at this point, it was hard to see the difference, especially after that night. Hearing that laugh, seeing the way Sephiroth’s green eyes tended to sparkle a little when he was amused or happy. The way his lip curled up at one edge when he found something someone else did funny, but didn’t want to say anything. The way that voice softened just slightly when he spoke of things he liked, and people, hinting at how fond he was of them.

“—ld? Cloud?”

Cloud started when he realized that because of his silent staring, Sephiroth had come up to him to see if he was all right. It only made the heat radiating off his ears that much hotter and his heart felt as if it would pump itself right out of his chest. He was focusing on things he shouldn’t be if he wanted to actually talk. His eyes were glued to Sephiroth’s rather extremely good-looking face and his throat became as dry as Cosmo Canyon.

And then he did the worst thing he could have done. Cloud eagerly blamed the stress of the moment on his action later when retelling it to Zack. That was, of course, after Zack had heard the whole account from Sephiroth’s point of view, which was probably far more accurate than his was. And that was entirely the problem.

He leaned up on his tiptoes and pressed their lips together. It wasn’t a good kiss, a few strands of Sephiroth’s hair had gotten between their mouths, and it was quick because he was unbalanced and suddenly aware of what he was doing. So he stumbled and the doorknob jammed into the small of his back and he winced at the annoying pain it produced, his already heightened nerves making it seem worse than it was.

Sephiroth didn’t seem all that…well…his expression hadn’t changed and Cloud feared for a moment that he had ruined everything. That he had made Sephiroth insane himself from that unexpected but stupid act.

Then the man sighed and shook his head. “Cloud Strife, you are terrible at kissing. I shall have to teach you.”

He barely had a chance to register that curl at the edge of the General’s mouth before an arm had snaked around his slimmer waist and pulled him up close to the hulking mass of his superior. And in even less time than it took to blink, Cloud was being kissed again, but it wasn’t like before. The two before, one in the hospital room and the other just seconds ago, were pale imitations to this.

I know that Zack said that Sephiroth hadn’t ever dated anyone but in Aeris’ name, how did learn to kiss so damn well?! Indeed, Cloud’s knees were going weak, and it didn’t help when Sephiroth’s limber tongue had managed to pry open the cadet’s mouth and dove in. Not that it took a lot of urging, Cloud was putty in the General’s hands.

Had it not been for the fact that Sephiroth seemed to have the situation well in hand and knew when Cloud’s lungs were about to explode from lack of air, he probably would have suffocated to death. Not that he would have objected to dying at that point. That would have been an excellent way to go.

“That is a kiss, Cloud Strife. Now go back to your room. We both need sleep and I have to be up early in the morning.”

Cloud only distantly registered Sephiroth gently pushing him from the apartment. In fact, it was only later that he recalled the details his mind had stored because it hadn’t been able to take it all in. Like the sensation of Sephiroth’s tongue and how it had been so soft, despite all the tongue-lashings he gave the recruits, grunts, and military officers alike. How their lips had that one-second awkwardness before Cloud had tilted his head and their mouths seemed to just click and became one perfect pleasurable moment. The warmth of the taller man’s arm around his back that had held him up so effortlessly when he’d melted against that well-muscled chest and how those lips had stretched into a smile during the kiss.

It was at that moment that he realized something. Cloud had assumed that Sephiroth would be rather…passive in a relationship simply because perhaps a lack of knowledge in how one interacted with someone they were dating. He knew now this was not the case. Sephiroth may not understand romantic love, which brought the question of who did understand it, but he certainly wasn’t the type to just let things happen.

“Oh…dear…” he muttered at the thought that maybe he was in over his head and he slumped down to the floor.

He’d go back to his room…when he had his knees again.

Redemption, Ch08

2008-01-12T22:39:08Z

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 2,047
Chapter: Chapter 8/17
Status: Complete
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

“Zack. Five minutes.”

“On the dot.”

“…Your punctuality is only remarkable when you have chosen the wrong place to use it.”

Zack only grinned and wormed his way under Sephiroth’s arm and into the apartment his friend and superior had as his own. Even if 1st class SOLDIERs got luxurious accommodations compared to the rest of the army, it was absolutely nothing compared to this. ShinRa gave absolutely everything they could at the drop of the hat for their precious, five-star General to make sure he was happy. State of the art technology; a kitchen about the half the size of the cafeteria; a bedroom that would put the president’s to shame; lights and furniture of all different shapes, sizes, and strengths. They’d even given him his own private workroom with weights and all sorts of things specifically designed for his strength alone.

Sephiroth never used even half of what he had.

His general didn’t know how to cook, as that wasn’t something necessary to warfare, and the recreational items were rarely used since Sephiroth was hardly home at any decent hour. And only one chair did Sephiroth ever grace with his presence and not even Zack had ever been allowed to put his butt there to find out what was so special about it that made Sephiroth like it so.

“What are you doing here?”

“Bugging you, what else? You and Cloud left and you thought I didn’t notice. I’m hurt!” he teased, looking over his shoulder at his frowning friend. Only in his apartment did Sephiroth don anything other than his customary leathers and his favorite kind of shirts tended to be soft, long-sleeved turtlenecks, usually in the somber colors of dark navy blue or black. Today was black, to match a corresponding pair of soft pants that weren’t really sweats, but they weren’t slacks either.

“I went. I saw Ms. Gainsborough. I didn’t see any other reason to remain around and isn’t it customary for the ‘extra wheels’ to leave when a couple is out on a date?”

Zack frowned as Sephiroth moved back to his favorite chair placed right at the side of the glass wall that looked down over the whole complex of ShinRa. To be brutally honest, Zack had never been fond of heights in any way, shape, or form and though he didn’t fear them, he certainly wasn’t comfortable next to that fragile glass that seemed it would break if he so much as tapped it with one finger.

“You two will never be extra wheels, you know. I wanted you two to have fun too and Aeris is great fun! She knows all the best places, especially those that haven’t been found by ShinRa. Little pockets in Midgar where stuff grows and you can have wholesome entertainment. Plus, she’s a great cook.”

Sephiroth sighed and though he opened the book he’d been reading before Zack had invaded, his eyes didn’t seem to be moving over the words, so Zack knew that he still had all of Sephiroth’s attention. It wasn’t easy to pick out these tiny nuances of his friend, and he always prided himself when he did. Not because it was some sort of prestige to know them, but that he was happy Sephiroth trusted him enough to show him. He was sure that Sephiroth had never once let anything show around someone like Hojo.

“I would prefer to stay in my apartment and read in silence. This is something that I would consider fun, though I do realize that you, who I am convinced was injected not with mako but pure sugar, don’t sit very well or be quiet very well at all.”

He laughed and sat across from Sephiroth, firmly not looking out the window like his friend was so happy to do. “So.”

Sephiroth had never actually, to his knowledge, ever said the words ‘So what’ in reply to something like that, but Zack could practically hear it in the silence and the turning of a page.

Really, Sephiroth needed to have something in this apartment that made noise, because it would drive Zack mad if he had to live here with all that silence.

“What’s up with you and Spike?”

The subject of Cloud, as always, caused Sephiroth to look up. Zack wasn’t sure his superior even knew he was doing it. Wasn’t sure he knew the way his cat-like, emerald eyes focused with sudden concentration. Probably not. In some ways, he’s just as bad as Cloud is and yet he’s also completely different. Cloud may not act on them, but he at least knows what he’s doing. Sephiroth probably has no clue that he’s gotten really fond of Cloud. Or…at least I hope he’s fond of Cloud.

“The question is quite vague, Zack. Could you be more specific?”

Zack considered the taller man for a long moment, weighing the chances of his continued good health versus actually asking a very loaded question. True, he could dodge a Bolt3 with fantastic reflexes, but that wasn’t what he was concerned about. He was more concerned about lasting effects of an emotional nature.

“Well, he asked you out. You said yes. And yet you two haven’t gone on one single date or acted like you’re actually lovers.”

“That is because we aren’t. Nothing physically—”

“Lovers isn’t just a term to describe physical things between people. It also means emotional intimacy.”

“…Does this mean we are lovers?”

For once, that stumped Zack and he only stared at his commander, who seemed to think his question was entirely reasonable. “Uh…Seph…Love ya too and all that, but we are not lovers. We’re friends.”

“You described lovers as also being emotionally intimate. We are very close, emotionally intimate, you might say. Does that not make us lovers then?”

“Totally different thing. We’re friends, best friends, so naturally we’re emotionally close. We talk to each other a lot. Emotionally intimate with someone of a romantic nature is entirely different. It means you can talk to them about stuff you can’t talk to me about and we talk about stuff that you maybe can’t talk to them about. That sort of thing.”

Sephiroth frowned a little and looked out the window at the whole of the ShinRa complex below. It showed the barracks, training centers, cafeteria; all the buildings of ShinRa that dealt in even some miniscule way with the military. No matter what, he thought with irony, Sephiroth would always know what was going on with those under him. All he had to do was look out that glass-wall-window.

“Look, Seph, are you interested in Cloud in a romantic way at all? You said you’d go out with him, and yet you haven’t made the first move.”

“I’m still not convinced that he meant it in a romantic fashion.”

“Then why did you say yes?”

There was a puzzled look on his commander’s face and Zack guessed that he’d probably pointed something out to Sephiroth that he hadn’t actually had time to consider. “I’m…not sure. At the time, I wanted to see how he would react.”

“And now?”

“I don’t know. He’s a mystery, one that I find irresistible. I want to figure it out. You know I’ve always had a weakness for mysteries. I don’t understand him and I want to.”

“Then go on a date with him. Give Cloud a chance! You’re not going to find out what you want to know just by being his friend like I am. There are just some things that can’t be said to a friend, no matter how close, and maybe he’s waiting for that. Maybe he’s as unsure of your feelings about dating you as you are about his.” He paused, pursing his lips and leaning back in his chair. “During the war, you were praised for your ‘innovative strategy’ and ‘forceful moves’. And yet, right now with Cloud, it’s like you’re hesitating. I’ve never seen you hesitate on anything before.”

“I’m not hesitating.”

“Then how do you describe the fact that you still haven’t moved the relationship past friendship?”

For a long time, there wasn’t anything more said and Zack only sat there and watched his friend.

-0-0-0-

Apparently I wasn’t the only one Zack got to. I’m not sure whether to kill him or promote him. I’m definitely glad that he is not my enemy.

“Sir? If it’s not a good time for that—”

“Are you asking me out on a…date?”

Cloud shifted uncomfortably. “Well, Zack came to see me yesterday after that trip out with him and his girlfriend and said that I’d be waiting forever for you to ask me, so…” With a surge of courage, he straightened his shoulders. “Yes, I was.”

Sephiroth looked back at the pass that Zack had issued that allowed Cloud to get all the way up to his office without getting stopped and inwardly sighed in both relief and frustration. The computer screen at his left still showed him his schedule for the recent future in a placid way, as if it didn’t care that he was quite irritated with it, regardless of the fact that it wasn’t at fault.

“I must give you my apologies, Cloud, but I won’t be free for the next two weeks, neither for a date or our match. I’m being sent out to North Corel and then down to Costa Del Sol before returning.”

Cloud’s youthful face fell a little and he could see that he was obviously upset about it. Frowning a bit, he tried to come up with alternate solutions, but was coming up with nothing. It was either tonight, or wait for the next two weeks. They couldn’t have a match that night, there was no time to set it up and he didn’t wish to have an audience for something like this. He feared it might distract Cloud and that wouldn’t be a good way to determine his true ability and whether he could make it into SOLDIER.

“If I can offer a compromise,” he finally said, tapping on his keyboard and closing out his calendar. He’d almost swear those slightly drooping spikes of hair became lively again and interest flashed in the blue eyes that met his. “I have to pack for my trip and there is no time for the match, but if you meet me at my quarters tonight, we can spend a few hours talking. It’s the closest I can come to a…date for the next two weeks.”

He could see Cloud thinking it over. Honestly, he found it a bit unexpected that the cadet didn’t just jump at the chance, but he supposed he shouldn’t have been surprised. Cloud wasn’t someone who, usually was impulsive. In fact, the only time that Cloud had ever given him the impression of being impulsive had been in the medical bay. He thought of every single angle before making a decision and Sephiroth commended that.

If only that could rub off onto his Lieutenant. If only.

“I don’t know if I can make it to your quarters without clearances, sir, but I’d like to, if it’s all right with you.”

Sephiroth stared at the somewhat impish smile that had come over Cloud’s face and he seemed genuinely happy about the compromise. He couldn’t remember any time, notwithstanding Zack, that anyone had ever been happy about just talking to him when it couldn’t truly benefit them in some way. He almost smiled, probably would have if the hidden cameras in his office weren’t there. They were already recording his invitation to the cadet, no need to give it more ammunition and show just how…fond he was Cloud.

“I’ll take care of the details and pass it on to Zack to give to you later today. I’m…looking forward to it.”

In a single instant that he swore lasted almost a year, something old and painful passed over Cloud’s blue eyes. He had seen the expression there before, especially during their trip out with Zack and his girlfriend, but this time it had changed somewhat. There was something new amid the oldness and hurt: hope.

What Cloud was actually hoping for, he didn’t know, but Sephiroth felt a sense of satisfaction anyway. Could he be one step closer to the mystery?

Redemption, Ch07

2007-12-17T00:07:27Z

Wow, three chapters in one day, right? I did my best to proofread them several times before posting, so I hope I got any word and misspellings fixed.

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 3,076
Chapter: Chapter 7/17
Status: Complete
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

It was probably one of the hardest days of Cloud’s life, to accompany Zack, Sephiroth, and Aeris through the slums. He barely registered where they were going or what they were doing, only managing to give the most minimal of answers when asked a question. He was quite willing to let Sephiroth take the lead from their stance in the group. Though he’d anticipated that this was going to be hard when he finally gave in to Zack’s pestering, he didn’t have any clue how hard.

Aeris was as beautiful now as ever in his memories. He could see the life shining in her eyes so brightly that it was like sun and she was likely thinking about nothing more than her flowers and Zack. The dress was the same, the ribbon the same, the voice…That voice still haunted his thoughts, surrounding him with comfort but also well-known guilt at his inability to save her.

And yet for all the pain that he had over what he had failed to prevent, seeing her like this had managed to bolster his determination like nothing else could. Her and Zack…he loved them dearly, they were the people he was closest to in his whole life. This time he would not fail. They would not lose their happiness together; he’d give his life to protect it this time, because they deserved that much after what they had done for him.

Nobody seemed to notice his quiet preoccupation and for that he was grateful. He never would have thought he could be this quiet, but then, until he’d been sent to the past, he’d never thought a lot of things he was capable of. Battling Sephiroth so many times had tested his limits, but in battle. This ‘mission’ was testing not his determination, but his ruthlessness to complete it. What he would and wouldn’t do to see the ending he wanted.

A jog at his elbow made him blink and look up. Sephiroth gave the impression of being extremely put-upon, though his expression wasn’t that much different from normal. He glanced significantly at Zack and Cloud followed his gaze, noting the two lovebirds were in their own little world for a few precious moments. They’d dropped back quite a bit from the two, and though Sephiroth could never really “blend in”, they weren’t being noticed as much.

He didn’t understand what Sephiroth had planned for him to do, exactly, until he was quietly being dragged away, falling further and further back from the strolling couple, and darted into the shadows of two ramshackle buildings before it could be noticed.

“You were so lost in thought that I didn’t think I could get your attention in time to slip away. Of course, I could have left you there, but that would have been unnecessarily cruel.”

Cloud nearly chuckled at the dry humor, something he was sure only Zack had ever had the pleasure of hearing before. “Considering how Zack was so busy fawning over Aeris, I don’t think he’ll notice we’re gone for awhile, sir.”

“I would doubt that, but there should be enough lapse for us to get a safe distance away,” Sephiroth replied, heading down deeper into the tiny alleyway, only to come out on the other side amid stores. For a second he wasn’t quite sure where they were until he recognized Wall Market. The last time he had seen it…so long ago now, and it, like the rest of Midgar, had been complete wreckage.

“Are you going to head back to the barracks, sir?”

Sephiroth glanced around and finally shrugged. “It was the plan originally, but I wonder if that’s the first place Zack is going to look when he finds us gone and I’d rather not have to replace my door from his incessant pounding.”

He tilted his head to the side and finally got the courage up enough to ask, “Zack says the two of you are friends, but it always seems like you’re…”

“Like I’m insulting him?” Sephiroth shrugged, thankfully not taking offense to his question. Perhaps it was being too critical of the man, but everyone in ShinRa was well aware of how much the General valued his privacy above all else. “He’s a fine SOLDIER and a good person and one of…few people that I have come to rely on when I absolutely need it. But that doesn’t deny the fact that he can be relentlessly persistent and annoying when the mood takes him. For all that I am fond of him, he does irritate and annoy me to an unhealthy degree sometimes.”

The silver-haired man picked a direction and out of instinct, Cloud followed behind him. Whether that was an instinct of now as a commanding officer and perhaps friend, or an instinct of a future not come to pass where he had followed wherever Sephiroth had ended up to fight him, he wasn’t sure.

“Are you planning on taking the SOLDIER exams three months from now?”

Cloud looked up and met Sephiroth’s gaze with his own guarded one. He didn’t want his thoughts to be so easy to read, nor let this man have any guess as to what he knew. Granted, it was so far-fetched, no one in their right mind would ever guess the great General went insane, but the ‘great General’ was not an ordinary person. Disregarding his JENOVA cells, his intensive training, the tests performed on him, Sephiroth had a keen mind, one that didn’t miss much, if anything at all.

“Yes, sir.”

“You’re barely the age to pass. I’m not even sure how you got into ShinRa in the first place.”

“I’m from Nibelheim. There aren’t many things to tempt people to leave there, so I guess when ShinRa decided on their strategy for getting anyone to come here was not to mention the age issue.”

“Even so…” Sephiroth shot him a skeptical look, but didn’t pursue it. In truth, Cloud didn’t remember how he got into SOLDIER, being as young as he was. He had too many things he had to keep in mind as it was, and it wasn’t that necessary for him to know how he got where he was at, as it was to know where he was going and how he was getting there.

Perhaps from an urge to defend his decision, Cloud found himself explaining more than he would like. “It took a long time to get to be even considered a candidate for the exam itself. If I don’t take it in three months, then what would be the point of it all?”

“There are later times than in just three months.”

“Yes, but,” he argued passionately, “that’s nearly ten months after the three months and that’s not accounting for any scheduling changes. I don’t know what’ll happen in the future, or if I’ll get bumped somewhere along the line from the candidates back to the regular army and I’ll never get back in. I’d rather take the chance I get in three months than play the safe route and risk losing it all.”

“Even if you can’t do it?”

Cloud frowned at the question, but it was said with no inflection whatsoever and Sephiroth’s eyes were staring straight ahead, taking a path through the districts in a slow, methodical way back to ShinRa while leaving time for Zack to give up pounding at their doors and leave so they would have peace. “What, sir?”

“There is no denying that your instructors speak well of you, most of your subjects at any rate. And there is no denying that you do appear gifted in many respects. You outshine most of your classmates. However, I haven’t seen anything that would tell me you have real talent when put to the test. The exams are not like the training in the classrooms. Part of it is written, yes, but the rest of it is fighting, both in controlled conditions and out in the wilderness with difficult monsters and no backup to help you. Rigorous does not even begin to describe it and it is as much a mental battle as it is physical. ShinRa only wants the best of the best and if you aren’t that, they have no use for you and could care less whether you live or die. Are you willing to risk it knowing you could die in the process, from sheer exhaustion if nothing else?”

Though he held his tongue, he desperately wanted to say that he knew what it was like, had already done it, but he couldn’t. He had the stand there and act like a dumb, green but passionate recruit and maintain that silence. “Then can I show you, sir?”

“Show me what?”

Cloud had been so absorbed in their conversation that he hadn’t noticed how quickly they had ended up traveling and the doors to ShinRa were fast approaching. “Show you that I can do it, that it’s not just dumb luck that I’ve made it this far.”

Sephiroth finally looked at him again and though he seemed noncommittal, he was also vaguely interested. “Very well,” he replied, after a silence that seemed to last an eternity. “Next Saturday in the afternoon, meet me in the cafeteria and we will go to the gym and we will see.”

It was only when he was standing there by himself, Sephiroth having continued on into the building, that he realized what his hot-headedness had gotten him into once again. The first time, he’d said ‘I love you’; now the second was a fight that he had no doubt he’d lose with this body.

He felt like banging his head against a wall repeatedly. “What am I going to do with you?” he muttered to his brain and with a sigh, trudged through the doors back into ShinRa’s oppressive hell.

-0-0-0-0-0-

“AH HA!”

Cloud groaned as Zack got up from the floor and watched as he slid his keycard through the swipe and entered into his room. “What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be with your girlfriend? In fact, shouldn’t you have already been here and gone by now?”

Zack gave a hearty laugh and dropped down to sit on Cloud’s bed. “That means you followed Seph’s logic then. He wouldn’t hurry, hoping I’d be hotheaded enough to run ahead as soon as I noticed you were gone. But you see, I know how Seph thinks and I knew that was what he’d do, so I merely waited a bit more and then came back to give you two time to return. Had good timing too, I was only waiting there two minutes or so.”

Cloud gave him a look, and couldn’t decide whether he was amused or irritated. “I think everybody underestimates you a lot, Zack.”

“You’re finally noticing!” the SOLDIER crowed with a huge grin. “As for Aeris, I let her know. I’m not oblivious; I knew the moment you two left. I decided to pick you first and then I’ll go bug Seph after. After all, if I don’t give him at least five minutes to himself, I’ll get far too acquainted to the Masamune than I ever want to be.”

For a moment there was silence before Zack, a ball of energy confined in a human body, was on his feet again and bouncing around the room. “Well, what did you think?”

“Of what?” he replied, grabbing a book from the bookshelf and dropping down to sit on his bed to read it.

Zack immediately snatched it from him and sat on Cloud’s knees, effectively pinning the boy from leaving until his ‘interrogation’ was over. “Of what, he asks. Of Aeris, of course! She liked the two of you of a lot, you know.”

His mind went blank for a second that felt like an eternity before he could force his closed throat to move. “I think she’s a very nice girl, Zack. You two are made for each other, in fact, given that she understands and even encourages your evil sense of humor.”

Once again he was treated to Zack’s laugh and it felt like he could drown in it. Before he’d come back to this past, when was the last time he’d heard a laugh like that? Free and clear, with no cares, like none of the bad things that ever happened could touch him. As if that laugh were armor to ward away even the most potent of blows and remain intact after.

The depressing truth was, Cloud didn’t think he’d heard a laugh like that since Zack died, from himself or from anyone else, except for perhaps Aeris.

“Come on, Spike, you got to laugh more!” It was as if Zack had read his mind, but his common sense told him he probably just saw the thought in his face. He kept his blue eyes away from looking at Zack’s face, because he knew that if he didn't, he’d see that seriousness in the violet gaze, the sadness that he wouldn’t confide in his friend, the hurt that he couldn’t help with whatever bothered Cloud. And if he saw that, he wasn’t sure he could say no a second time. It had taken a lot, a helluva lot, to keep his mouth shut the first time Zack had asked and he didn’t know if he could test his courage to say no again.

“So?”

“So what, Zack?”

“So what did you and Seph talk about when you two were alone? Anything about the state of current affairs?”

Cloud blinked, looking at his superior in confusion. State of current affairs? “Well, not really. I don’t think he’d be interested to know what goes on in my classes—”

Before he’d even finished, Zack was waving his hand and dismissing what he’d been about to say with an airy gesture. “Not that state of affairs! Affairs! You know, dating and that kind of stuff!”

He could feel the blush go all the way up his neck to his ears and cheeks and he shoved the man hard onto the floor. “Zack! Would you stop asking me about that?!”

“What are you so embarrassed for?” Zack asked with a chuckle, but didn’t get up from the floor and trying to fend off being beaten to death with a pillow. “You already confessed your love and Seph said okay, right? So when, oh when, are you two going to go on a date? I hate to tell you, Spike, but if you’re waiting for Seph to ask you, you’re never gonna hear it. You have to take the bull by the horns if you want to get anywhere with that man!”

“Zaaack,” he said warningly, and held up the pillow threateningly, but it only appeared to make his friend laugh so hard he had tears in his eyes and could barely remain sitting up.

“I only want to see you two happy and frankly, Seph needs to start dating anyway,” was finally the halfway serious reply he got when Zack finally calmed down.

“I know you do, Zack, but frankly…” Cloud slumped back down onto the bed from his kneeling position and bit his lip. His answer seemed to intrigue his friend, who leaned forward and poked his knee when he didn’t continue immediately. And continued poking for every second gone by filled only with silence. He shot Zack an annoyed look, which was only met with an unrepentant grin. “I just don’t know why he even said yes to begin with. I mean, it’s obvious he doesn’t have any romantic feelings, especially at that time, since it was the first time he’d met me. So why did he agree?”

Zack seemed to mull it over for a bit, picking at the sheets underneath his hands as he leaned against the bed. “I’m gonna tell you the same answer I told Seph when he asked me if you were serious: I don’t know. I may be as awesome as the sunrise, but I’m not psychic by any means. I only know what you guys let me see and what I work out. Maybe, and I’m only guessing here, he said yes ‘cause he thought you were joking and was trying to beat you at your own game? I really don’t know, but I think it’s a good idea. The two of you are a lot alike and yet completely different in a lot of ways. You’d be good for each other.

“However, if either of you wants to really know the other for sure, and find out the answers to the questions you have, you can’t just sit here and do nothing.” Zack sighed a bit and stood up, dusting off his pants. “Both of you don’t act enough. You always sit back and analyze to bits before taking the slightest step forward. You need to sometimes just do something you’re not sure of instead of playing it safe all the time.” His trademark grin came back in full force and he headed for the door. “See ya, Cloud. Time to go bug Seph until he nearly kills me!”

Cloud watched him go in silence, trying to ignore the truth of Zack’s words and knowing he couldn’t. He had determined to himself that he was going to do everything possible to prevent Sephiroth from going insane again, but he’d been doing it from Zack’s position, from a friend’s position, in the General’s life. Unlike Zack, he had another avenue open that he could explore, tackle from that angle, but the mere thought of actually acting upon those hotheaded words and dating the man caused him to blush and nearly freeze up at the same time.

And yet, if he chose to ignore the path and he couldn’t stop the insanity from claiming his mentor, he’d always wonder if the road not taken would have been the one prevent it all. He chewed on his lip, staring at the book in his hands but not really seeing it. He could do it; Sephiroth was hardly anything less than stellar in the looks department and he did admire and like the man as a person…

Well, even if he couldn’t ignore this option, he could certainly ignore the faint feeling of thrill that went down his spine at the thought of actually dating the most perfect being on the planet. To date…the man in his memories.

Unconsciously, he began to smile.

Redemption, Ch06

2007-12-17T00:04:39Z

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 1,835
Chapter: Chapter 6/17
Status: Complete
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

Cloud left Zack’s quarters with a heavy heart and frayed nerves. He hadn’t expected to be put on the spot like that with everything. The word stressful didn’t even begin to cover it and he wearily made his way back to his own little cubical room to get a nap. He’d done nothing more than sit there, but he felt as if he’d ran ten miles at full speed, being chased by a dozen evil Sephiroths.

He knew Zack meant well, but he couldn’t tell him. How could he tell Zack that his mind was, in fact, twenty-three years old and came from a possible future? How he could tell the man that his best friend had gone insane, burned down Nibelheim, tried to kill him, and almost destroyed the planet? Tell Zack that Sephiroth had killed his beloved Aeris? He couldn’t, just couldn’t.

That future, the knowledge of what happened, was his own burden to carry. He knew that it would never happen again in that specific way, knew that should Sephiroth go insane again that though the end result might be the same, the journey there would be twice as hard. He knew this, but he still held the memory of where he had come from in the forefront of his mind as a reminder not to fail. As a reminder that if he had thought that was bad, it would be so much worse this time.

There was no room for failure. He could not be distracted. He had to get into SOLDIER and this time, he thought he could make it. He would do everything he could to make it.

Because things were different now. Now he knew Sephiroth and could have a dim glimpse of the pain Zack must have gone through in his heart when he had seen the General go insane. At the time, he had thought it was painful, how Sephiroth had once been his idol, but he had never really known him personally. The betrayal had not run nearly as deep in him as he had thought, as it would have for Zack. Now, he knew the man behind the legend.

He knew the half-smiles that legend wore when he was amused; the hint of humor lurking beneath the surface of his mouth; the perfect warrior that was just a bit clumsy on the social side; the awkward caring hidden beneath a cool exterior. He was seeing more and more of the person named Sephiroth, rather than just the idealized and far away General.

Cloud could not lose such a man like him. He truly was a leader, a powerful one. He was a…good man. The world needed someone like him, someone like who he was right now. Someone confident, someone who wouldn’t accept defeat, someone who could and would protect even if he might seem intimidating.

Things were changing, he knew this. It wasn’t as if he was psychic or had any given ability to know, but he just did, at least in himself. There had been a point shortly after this had all started that he wondered if he could ever stop the instinctive reactions, the urges to run for his sword, the confusion, but they were fading. More disturbingly, so were some of his memories of what had transpired. It wasn’t as if he were forgetting them, and some of the more potent were still like fire in his mind, but other things that happened were losing some of their clarity and details, becoming foggy in his memory as new things were pushing them back.

He frowned as he stepped through the door into his room. It was no wonder Zack finally called him on it today. He was so busy trying to just keep up with everything, do everything at once, that it was obvious that he had no time to enjoy anything. He glanced at his closet where his sword was, but decided it was better to catch up on some much needed sleep. If he didn’t, he’d start getting dark circles under his eyes and then it would be really noticeable that something was wrong.

-0-0-0-

“Come on, Seph!”

“No.”

“What’s the harm? It’s not like there’s anything here that can’t be done some other time.”

“What part of ‘no’ do you not understand?”

“…”

“Your ‘puppy eyes’ are not working on me. Turn them on your girlfriend.”

“Love to, Seph, if you’d just come with me!”

“I’m busy.”

“If for no other reason, be a chaperone for Cloud.”

Sephiroth sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose at Zack’s continued wheedling. Tomorrow was one of the few universal days off in ShinRa, owing to some-such nonsense as the President’s birthday or something. He couldn’t truly remember why, only that he got a chance to spend locking himself up in his room and relaxing. To avoid the insanity and verbal sniping of those around him; to dodge the incessant whispers and hideously clumsy recruits; to ignore the insistent messages of Hojo’s to come down to the lab.

“Zack. Tomorrow is a rare day off. Why would I want to come with you when you go visit your girlfriend?”

Zack leaned over his desk to annoyingly invade his personal space, snatching up papers Sephiroth had been working on finishing, much to his irritation. “Because I want you to meet her, you and Cloud. She’s been insisting on it, since I talk about you guys so much.”

“Zack, why on earth would you talk to your girlfriend about your superior officer and junior recruit so much that she would wish to meet them?”

Of course, this question prompted Zack to go into an overload of theatrics and Sephiroth wished he’d kept his mouth shut. “Because that superior officer, aka you and junior recruit, aka Cloud, are my friends. And friends meet girlfriends!”

“Have you even discussed this with Cloud first before trying to drag me into this war zone?”

“Aeris’ house is hardly a war zone.”

The silver-haired man frowned. “You didn’t answer my question. You didn’t ask him yet, did you? You’re making plans for him without consulting him, when he could have other things set in place.”

“Come on, Seph! This is Cloud we’re talking about here. He’ll probably just shut himself up in his room, like someone else I know here I might add, and read or something. You both need a break and Aeris wants to meet you, and for once, all three of us are off at the same time!”

Sephiroth knew that look in Zack’s eyes very well, which meant that unless he wanted to hear about this all day long in as high pitched voice as his second in command could do, he’d best give in. It went against the grain and he really didn’t want to go anywhere, but Zack knew all the right, or wrong depending on who’s side you were on, buttons to push.

“Fine, but only if Cloud agrees to go.” Zack gave him a long, insinuating look and he sent a blistering glare right back, as he had a very good idea what that stare was meant to say. “…What?”

“So long as Cloud agrees to come? Didn’t know you had it that bad for him.”

“Wipe that grin off your face before I do it for you,” he snapped, but Zack only smiled wider, as if he knew Sephiroth wouldn’t actually kill him just then. “I refuse to be the only one uncomfortable in this meeting.”

“Hmm, wouldn’t that make it a double-date though? Fun!”

“Zack! Are you even listening to me?” he demanded, but considering that Zack was almost literally skipping out of his office, he would wager the answer to that would be ‘no’.

Planet help me, what did I just agree to exactly?

And no matter how Sephiroth fervently hoped Cloud would have more success in denying Zack than he had, he found himself standing next to said cadet outside a two-story house surrounded by flowers in the Sector Five slums. Apparently Cloud had been informed of Sephiroth’s condition and he shifted his weight a little too often to be called anything other than ‘fidgeting’.

“Sorry, sir,” he muttered under his breath. “I tried to say no…”

“No need for apologies,” Sephiroth replied with an inward sigh. “I’d hoped you might have more success at resisting him than I, but I didn’t really expect it.”

If he wasn’t mistaken, the sound he heard was close to a chuckle and glanced down at Cloud at the corner of his eye. A secret smile touched his mouth and he stared off to the side, eyes not quite focused on anything, and Sephiroth would have given anything at that moment to know what it was he was thinking. He still was nowhere near close to unraveling the mystery of the young man and it was very much like quicksand. He was no closer to the core that held all the answers, but he could no longer find his way back.

“Zack!”

An enthusiastic voice made him look up, but by the time he’d located the window it had come from, the girl was nowhere to be seen. He didn’t have much longer to wait though, for a moment later, the door was thrown open and a blur of pink attached itself to his second-in-command’s chest. It was a wonder that the poor girl’s ribs weren’t broken, seeing as how hard Zack was hugging her.

“Heya, Aeris, I brought you a surprise! The one frowning and looking like his dog just died is Sephiroth and the one with blond, chocobo-like spikes is Cloud.”

‘Aeris’ was a lively girl. Her green eyes were vibrant and she wore a pale pink, button down dress and practical, brown boots. And though he’d never thought brown was pretty before, her hair color was the right shade between earthy and auburn. The ribbon in her hair matched her dress, and she studied him with the thoroughness of a general, though with nothing other than interest in her eyes.

“So you’re the amazing duo! When Zack talks about ShinRa at all, you two are the only ones he talks about.”

“So what do you think about a double-date?”

Her eyes went wide as she turned back to her boyfriend and seeing the slow gleefulness that was overtaking her features, Sephiroth could only hurry to set the record straight before something terrible happened that made him wish he were still on the frontlines of Wutai. “There will be no double-date, as the only couple here are you two.”

“Really? That’s a bit surprising.”

Sephiroth tilted his head just a little, green eyes narrowing in thought. “And why would you say that?”

Her gaze glanced between him and Cloud, who had somehow edged nearer and behind the bigger man at the scheming of the couple. “Call it woman’s intuition. It’s never wrong, you know.”

Somehow, he was getting a very bad feeling about the rest of his day.

Redemption, Ch05

2007-12-17T00:03:03Z

Series: Final Fantasy VII
Characters: Cloud, Sephiroth, Zack
Couple: Sephiroth/Cloud

Title: Redemption
Word Count: 2,822
Chapter: Chapter 5/17
Status: Complete
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: If I had the rights to this, I'd so remake the game with updated graphics and some SephyxCloud action. :p
Summery: If you could go back in time, redo the past and change the future, would you do it? Even at the risk that you lose every single hard-won victory you've had?

The cafeteria, while stocked almost wall to wall with people, could not hide Zack. He’d been told numerous times in his life that it wasn’t because he was tall or built, but that his personality had created some larger-than-life, invisible aura that had people noticing him and he often used it to good advantage when he wanted to find someone. His earthy-brown eyes scanned the crowd, pushing good-naturedly past all kinds of recruits, grunts, and SOLDIERs alike. No one seemed to mind too much, as it was hard to actually dislike Zack and his million-gil smile.

He spotted what he was looking for fairly easily, though getting there was a bit on the difficult side. It wasn’t a wonder, to him, that Cloud had managed to find a spot among the crush of bodies. He’d seen it happen so many times; being small could be used to one’s full advantage in situations like this. What did change this time was that, rather than find a corner for himself out of shyness like Zack had always seen before, was that he seemed indifferent to the rest of those around him.

“There you are, Spike! Oops, sorry, Cloud,” he teased, dropping down to sit across from the trainee. Spike was, of course, his favorite nickname for Cloud, but he rarely used it these days, lest someone else start picking it up too and he was a bit on worried side of what Cloud might do if that happened.

After all, it seemed Zack was still the only one Cloud would allow that name from, which swelled the SOLDIER’s ego.

Blue eyes looked up from his lunch and a genuine smile lit the young features, though it did plummet his hopes a little. Still that edge of wariness in his gaze, even as it mixed with joy. Still that…age there, as if he weren’t teetering on edge from kid to teenager, but twice that. “Heya, Zack. How’d the mission go?”

Zack flicked his fingers to the side with a grin, indicating it was hardly worth talking about, in terms of effort. “Easy as eatin’ Aeris’ pie! It was overkill to send both me and Seph, but the guy insisted he had to be escorted by the General of ShinRa or he wouldn’t come at all.”

“So why did you have to go?”

“Guess Seph wanted someone else to join him in the misery of babysitting.”

Cloud laughed and for all the worry he held, Zack still delighted in the sound from his friend. Even before the sudden change, Cloud had just never laughed enough, as if he’d had no reason to. Nobody bothered listening to Zack when he tried to explain that laughter was the cure for just about anything. It was where one could let go all the stress and burdens didn’t seem as heavy as before.

“Got a surprise for you, but you have to answer a question first to get it,” he said spontaneously.

Cloud’s eyes became wary, and almost fearful, for a moment and Zack wondered what question his friend thought he was going to ask that would cause such a reaction. He hadn’t broached the subject of The Change, as he called it, because he knew Cloud was afraid of that and he had no want to make the trainee uncomfortable.

Zack wasn’t as oblivious as everyone said he was, but it sometimes it worked to his advantage for everyone to think that way, so he never bothered correcting anyone.

“What question?”

“Do you really love Seph?”

“He…told you about that?”

Zack nodded and his grin came back, forming quickly, when he watched red swirl on Cloud’s cheeks in consternation and embarrassment. “I can’t believe he told you!”

“Well, what did you expect him to do? You confused Seph more than I ever could, which you should get an award for by the way, and he knew that I knew you before. He wanted to know if you were serious.”

“What’d you tell him?”

The SOLDIER shrugged. “Told him that I didn’t know, but that you weren’t the practical joke type. After all, it’s the truth. That’s why I’m asking you, because I just can’t figure it out. You say you do, but you don’t ask for a date or anything, and yet I’ve seen how you watch him and it’s not exactly, um…shall we say, innocent.”

Cloud squirmed in his seat, picking at his food and no longer truly eating. Zack didn’t miss the extra calluses, more than his friend should have with just basic training, nor how he seemed twice as exhausted as the schedule would normally have him be. There was just something he was missing about this situation and he knew that if he could grasp what it was, that if Cloud opened up to him, everything would just make sense. But unlike before, Cloud didn’t tell him much anymore like he used to and that hurt.

“I…”

“ ‘I…’,” he prompted when nothing more was forthcoming and stole some of Cloud’s lunch that was growing cold on the tray, acting as if it wasn’t as important as Zack considered it truly was.

“I don’t want to talk about it here.”

His gaze flicked back up, on Cloud’s face as it turned away, and though he felt a flash of disappointment, he also seized his opening. This opening that he could use to his advantage, not only for this question, but also for all the worries that plagued him. “So you want to talk about it in a place you feel is safe?”

“Ideally, yeah.”

“All right then!”

Cloud looked back at him and Zack reveled in his bewildered look. Now that was the Cloud he knew, the one that was young and inexperienced and had no clue what was going on. The look that made him so cute, like a plushie, that he just had the urge to hug Cloud all up until he burst at the seams. “All right what?”

“Then let’s go.”

“Go where?”

“To the place you feel safe!”

Understanding kicked in and horror filled those deep sapphire eyes. Cloud may have learned to control what went across his face better, but Zack knew that even before then, if you really wanted to know what the trainee felt, all you had to do was look at his eyes. They told you everything you needed to know. “Zack, no…I’m eating lunch and I have class.”

Zack flicked part of what was supposed to be a chocolate brownie on Cloud’s plate into his mouth and stood up. “Come on, I’ve finally got you cornered and you said you’d talk somewhere safe. And I know you don’t have class today, the instructor got sick. So, come on or I drag you.” He flashed his patented grin that didn’t fail, even now, to make Cloud relax a little. “It’s not like I’m going to eat you or anything!”

For all the fact that Cloud followed him though, he trudged in such a way as if he were going to his own funeral. Whatever it was, it couldn’t be that bad, could it? He gently shoved his friend into his room, where they could talk in peace. ShinRa might monitor everything in the compound and buildings, but being a SOLDIER 1st did give you some privileges and that was without cameras and bugs in his room.

“So, talk. No one’s gonna overhear us here.”

Cloud sank onto a comfortable chair, and Zack felt the blue eyes on him as he lankily stretched out on his sofa, ready for a few hours chat. Despite his looks, he was good at interrogation and that was what he was planning on doing here. Not with whips and rods, but with gentle friendship he’d get the answers so he could help.

“I don’t…” Out of the corner of his eye, he watched his friend and how he licked his lips nervously, gaze casting about to land on anything he considered possibly not detrimental for his state of mind and nerves.

“You don’t what? Love Sephiroth?”

“No…”

“No what? No you don’t love him, or no you do love him?”

“Zack, you’re confusing the issue!” Cloud snapped, causing Zack to raise an eyebrow. “It’s not as simple as a yes or no answer!”

Ah, the meat the problem. Now all he had to do was work it out of the blonde. “Then what’s the answer?”

“The answer is, I don’t know!”

“Then why’d you say it?”

“Because I…” He didn’t miss the fact that Cloud was shaking slightly and Zack watched so closely, he swore he saw the wheels in his friend’s mind turning as he realized that the SOLDIER wasn’t going to let go and he had to say something. “Because I didn’t want him to leave.”

“Why not?”

Zack knew better than to elaborate on his question, adding possible suggestions that Cloud could take whether they were true or not. Cloud was smart, very smart, and whatever secret he had, he wanted to guard it so firmly that he’d lie to protect it. Well, perhaps not lie, at least not to Zack, but latch onto any partial truth and use that as cover so he wouldn’t have to explain anymore.

It was as if he had a mission, maybe to himself, that he had to use any and all means to complete successfully without being caught. What worried him the most about that, though, was if Cloud was willing to sacrifice even friendships for the sake of that goal, lying to those he trusted most.

“Sephiroth is…amazing, Zack. He’s simply amazing. Not just in battle, but with everything. All the strain he has to go through, all the responsibilities… he doesn’t break under the pressure, but somehow seems to thrive on it. He’s the kind of person that, even if he had completed something he set out to do and had concentrated on that for years, when it was done, he wouldn’t feel lost and without purpose anymore. He wouldn’t feel like he didn’t know what to do with his life anymore after that. Wouldn’t feel like he was stuck in place while everyone else moved on.”

Zack sat up just a little, trying not to move or distract Cloud from his fixed stare on the ground. Finally he’d gotten his friend to talk and he didn’t want to risk anything to have him clam up once more. The words, he understood them, but not the meaning behind them. He didn’t know where they were coming from, even if he did get the sense that this was about more than just Sephiroth. It was like Cloud was comparing himself to the general, which was not unusual, true, but not in the sense of battle or position, but self-worth. And yet not. It was all very confusing.

Zack felt like there was a coded message placed in front of him that had all the answers, but someone had forgotten to give him the key to decipher it.

“I won’t deny that I truly admire him and maybe I do love him, in a sense. Love him for what he is, what he’s done, how he can do anything and give hope to everyone else just by being in his presence. Is it romantic? I…I don’t think so. If you had asked me when I said it, I would have said no. Now I’m not so sure. Now I’m questioning.”

Zack’s eyes narrowed a bit, as the last sounded somewhat of a cop-out. Now he wasn’t so sure? It seemed as if he said it because he hoped that with such a standard response, he would accept it. And though he didn’t think his friend a liar, that maybe Cloud really was questioning a lot of stuff, he didn’t think that was the main issue. It was as if Cloud had realized what he was saying, all the truths, and tried to divert it, wrap up the ending, with a half-truth. Not a lie, but not fully candid either.

“Is that all?”

Cloud blinked and looked up at him in surprise. “What?”

With a sigh, Zack sat up entirely, bracing his elbows on his knees and his usual congenial expression fading to seriousness. “Everything you are, lately, is all wrapped up in Sephiroth. I can tell that clearly, seen how often you stare at him. But is that truly all it is? You can’t deny, either, that you occasionally flinch when you see him, or at some things he says, for no reason that I can see. You’ve never met him before in person until that day.”

“What day?”

“The day you fainted against him a few months ago.”

There it was again, the Wise Cloud, not young anymore. He was assessing the situation behind the blank and pasted on, faintly surprised look. It was almost as if he and Cloud were now the same age, the same rank, and they were playing some war strategy game, each trying to outwit the other. The problem with that was, the Cloud he had known, wouldn’t even know where to begin. This Cloud knew all the rules, all the steps, in the dance and could do them with ease.

No instructor would have taught him such a simple and unspoken art. That sort of thing only came with age and battle.

Zack finally decided to be blunt about it, to hope that amid that age and wariness, amid the plans that his friend had and his self-imposed mission, that their friendship would prevail. “Look, Spike, I know something happened to you that night. You’ve been different since then, in a lot of ways it would take me too long to explain, and I think you know those ways anyway. You’re going to worry me to death, here, if you don’t tell me what’s going on. I want to help, you obviously need it.”

For one dizzying second, the calculated expression faltered and he saw the insecurity, the worry, the sheer mental exhaustion Cloud was feeling. And in that moment, he swore that the invisible, almost unnoticeable barrier between them had fallen and he was about to hear all.

The moment passed and with it, his victory. “I’m sorry, Zack, but I can’t tell you. I can’t tell anyone, it’s something that depends on me alone. There’s no way I can burden you with this. And I’m afraid that even if I told you, you could never fully understand.” Cloud’s head shifted minutely all the while he was speaking to stare down at the floor and he whispered thickly, finally, “I’m sorry.”

He could hear the tears in the voice, see how they lingered at the edges of his friend’s eyes, but they weren’t shed. Hands were clenched into fists on his knees, arms locked at the elbows tightly, his whole body stiff with self-imposed control that he would not break. And though he really believed Cloud was sorry, it hurt a lot when he was denied that bond he had fought so hard to make before, during their friendship.

But Zack couldn’t ignore how obviously his friend was in pain and he stood up, only to kneel in front of the young trainee so he could look him in the eye. “All right, but please, Cloud. Promise me one thing: if it ever becomes too much, don’t be afraid to run to me. Run to me or Seph. We won’t push you away; we only want to help, if you can just let us in.” A weak grin appeared as he tried to joke, “I mean, what can stand up to a Zack’n’Seph combo attack?”

Cloud bit his lip hard, so hard he broke the skin, and the wetness across his eyes was more noticeable, but his cheeks remained dry as he breathed shallowly, pulling on some inner strength formed by hardship that had appeared in the split second that Zack hadn’t been protecting his friend. A faint smile tugged at Cloud’s lips at the joke, but the heaviness in the atmosphere didn’t lift very much. In fact, it seemed to deepen that much more.

Sighing in sadness, Zack rested his forehead on the younger boy’s knees, feeling a hesitant hand touch his head as he did so. He hated this, hated it! He hated being useless. He was so powerful, almost as powerful as Sephiroth, so he liked to think, and yet he was useless to do anything to help. Where and why Cloud got the idea he had to have the world on his shoulders all alone, Zack didn’t know, but whoever had planted that idea really needed to beaten to a pulp.

In the silence of his room, he swore to himself that he would unravel this problem and make it go away so that he could see his friend be happy again. Smile without a care, and above all, trust.